


Frankly My Dear, I Don't Give a Damn

by MsHydeStylinson



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Famous Harry, Hand Jobs, Happy Ending, Holiday Fling, Las Vegas, Los Angeles, M/M, Mentions of Death, Musician Harry, New York City, Non-Famous Louis, Punk Louis, Rimming, Strangers to Lovers, Tattoo Artist Louis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-28
Updated: 2020-05-28
Packaged: 2021-02-28 19:41:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 45,482
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23442649
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MsHydeStylinson/pseuds/MsHydeStylinson
Summary: Harry wakes up with a god awful hangover and soon discovers there are pictures of him and a hot guy blasted all over social media. The problem is, Harry has no idea who this mystery man is, and doesn’t even remember meeting him...With their newfound compatibility and a dash of sexual chemistry, things quickly heat up between them. The plan was to have fun with the remaining days that Louis is in Los Angeles, nothing too serious, and get back to the real world in the UK. Well, sometimes things don’t always go as planned.Or,It felt almost impossible how swiftly and powerfully love had hit him when he finally had found the person to fall into it with. It was never meant to be like this. Three more days and Louis would be gone; out of his life almost as soon as he had appeared. From the beginning there had been this silent agreement about how their relationship would be and it had always come with an expiration date and at the time Harry had figured that it was better than nothing from Louis at all.But now, after his realisation, he wasn’t ready to give up so quickly. Harry decided in that moment there must be a way to change their trajectory.
Relationships: Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson, Zayn Malik/Liam Payne
Comments: 54
Kudos: 300
Collections: One Direction Big Bang Round 3





	Frankly My Dear, I Don't Give a Damn

**Author's Note:**

> “An AU where Harry is drunk af in a club and when he wakes up next day, there are lots of pics of him a man and the rest of the story is up to you”
> 
> This fic is based on this prompt tweet by justlikelou91 I saw on Twitter about a year ago. It took sometime to brew, but finally it’s here! 
> 
> Huge thank you to my wonderful beta and friend Jennie [Canadianlarrie](http://canadianlarrie.tumblr.com) for all the help you have given me through this process, once again. Also the credits of the two longer smut scenes in this fic goes for her. "You make them too short!", she said and offered to help. I was more than happy with that offer! 
> 
> The awesome moodboard and lovely polaroids are all made by Jazmin [jazhaza](http://jazhaza.tumblr.com) . She did a great job and I couldn’t be happier with her work. They fit perfectly to the story. Thank you for your co-operation!
> 
> And of course, I want to thank The Big Bang Mods for organizing this again this year, especially with everything going on in the world right now. 
> 
> Disclaimer: This is not real, never happened, complete fiction, etc. Please do not take any of this seriously, as it is all fake. Please do not translate or repost on any other site.

Harry woke to the sound of his own pitiful moan. And not the good kind. He first felt nausea slowly gnaw away in his chest, and that was soon followed by an incredibly foul taste in his mouth; like the cat had wee’d in it while he was sleeping. The room felt way too hot, the air too thick, and in his head, the pounding of his pulse felt as though he was beside an amplifier whose bass had been cranked up full force and every thump made his whole body quake.

“Ummfff…” Harry grunted miserably as the sun forced his eyes open and immediately flipped himself over, shielding his face with his forearm. Despite his weak attempt to escape the sudden brightness, the stubborn rays of sunshine were still assaulting him and made it impossible to sleep as the menacing rays pelted a kind yet unsolicited warmth at his face through the window.

He truly hated to sleep without the curtains drawn. He just felt far too exposed, afraid to wake up and find a drone buzzing just outside the panoramic window in his bedroom. He had definitely become more aware of his surroundings with the advancements in surveillance technology than he wanted to be, and nowadays he was overly cautious.

So now the question was, how fucking drunk had he been last night that he had forgotten to close the blackout curtains which protected his willy from the rest of the world before passing out on the bed… completely naked, at that?

Incredibly, if his pounding headache had anything to do with it. He pulled the duvet that barely covered a quarter of his naked body up over his head to hide his face from the punishing sunshine that made every blood vessel in his eyes feel as if they were unanimously exploding, along with the rest of his head. Although somehow, that thought felt oddly soothing because it would mean the end of his suffering once and for all.

Not five minutes later, he had to give up hope of an eternal afterlife because Harry had to find other ways to survive. If only to find out what the fuck happened last night.

“Fuck.” He mumbled and cursed inwardly why he had, once again, let Niall drink him under the table.

One would reckon over the past ten years they had known each other, Harry would have learnt that he, nor anyone else, should ever compete with Niall Horan when it comes to drinking. Whether it was his Irish heritage or his iron-clad stomach, he was always the last man standing when they partied, and his hangovers always seemed to be just a fraction as horrid as Harry’s.

Or maybe Niall was just so freaking good at faking he was feeling perfectly fine.

Whatever the reason, it didn’t comfort Harry right now. He was still waiting for the moment his head would do him in, with the taste of sour tequila still in his mouth as the rumbling in his stomach became heavier by the minute. It was just a matter of time until the contents of his belly would ascend and he’d have to rush to the loo to avoid the disaster.

Lying fully beneath the crème coloured silk sheet he was able to smell the awful waft of garlic from his own breath making his stomach turn again. Morning breath combined with the lovely mixture of garlic and old booze wasn’t something anyone would want from their lover, but as Harry now noticed, it was even worse when it seeped from himself. What the hell had he eaten last night? He usually tried to eat healthily but when he was high or drunk, he usually craved salty, greasy and artery-clogging junk food. Guess that had happened last night too.

Harry decided to be brave and move on his own accord before he was forced out of the bed by his retching guts. Carefully he slid his feet out from underneath the sheets, first one and then the other. Once they were freed from the tangled sheet, he swung them over the teak bed frame. The sudden movement caused his head to spin for a moment and on instinct, he slowed his movement. Once he was sitting up in bed, he stilled again for a moment before he cautiously pushed himself up and plodded slowly to the bathroom.

Fortunately for him, it was conveniently located in his bedroom and wasn’t far away, but it was still long enough for the contents of his belly to start doing unpleasant flips with every cautious step he took. He hastened his pace and just in time he crouched over the toilet seat and emptied his stomach into the porcelain bowl. Then he slowly straightened himself up to a standing position and flushed the toilet. But he didn’t have time to think about rinsing his mouth when the feeling took over him again. It felt like an eternity as he leant his hands against the plastic seat until he was sure nothing was going to come up anymore. Cold sweat glistened on his forehead as he hoisted himself up and with slightly trembling fingers he pressed the button to flush the toilet after having a wee.

He shifted gingerly near the sink and washed his hands before he brushed his teeth to get the gross taste out and gulped down two glasses of cold water along with a couple of painkillers. He shuffled himself back to the bedroom, closed the curtains using the control panel and crashed on the bed. He had no plans for today or for tomorrow, so he could just take advantage of it and sleep until his hangover was completely over. He reached for the remote, switched the AC on and set the temperature for optimal sleep. He closed his eyes and no less than five minutes later, he was sleeping like a baby.

He woke a few hours later feeling much better physically, but still completely knackered. Maybe he just had to admit to himself, he was starting to feel a bit too old to drink all night long. Well, twenty-five really wasn’t that old, but somehow his body seemed to disagree with him in this case.

Followed by a long sigh, Harry trudged himself to the shower and let the water wash away the remaining traces of the previous night. His dick twitched with interest when he let his hand brush over it while soaping up with mandarin orange shower gel, he usually loved it but now the scent made him feel sick again. He really could have used some good ol’ morning sex right now but after realising he was too lazy to even get himself off, he really started to feel he was approaching retirement age any day now.

Still drying himself with the fluffy towel, he padded to the walk-in closet to get himself some clothes. He dug out an old faded t-shirt and a pair of dark blue shorts without bothering to wear any boxers, cos free-balling at home was totally acceptable. Though he must admit, once or twice he might have left his underwear at home while performing too. Oops!

At that moment he noticed a bundle of clothes abandoned on the floor near the doorway. The disgusting smell of cigarette smoke was seeping from them and Harry quickly dropped them into the laundry basket, wondering when the scent had been absorbed into his clothes. He didn’t smoke, Niall didn’t smoke, none of the small group of people Harry had been with last night smoked, or if they occasionally did Harry never joined them in the designated smoking areas outside the clubs. Where the hell had been last night? He didn’t have a clue.

Nor any sort of memory of the previous night either, if he’s being honest…

Harry slipped his phone into his pocket and lazily padded downstairs to the kitchen. The first thing he saw when he stepped in was a huge pizza box sitting on the kitchen island and one-third of the pizza still uneaten. He hated to throw any food away but now he really didn’t have another option without knowing how the pizza got into his kitchen, by dropping the more than half-eaten pizza into the bio bin and the pizza box in the recycling bin.

Perhaps his hangover was finally passing as Harry felt his stomach grumble a little bit, and surprisingly craving food. He pulled the door of the sub-zero refrigerator open and took a quick look inside and decided on the safe option of bacon and eggs. But first things first. Harry measured out ground coffee, scooped it in the machine and flipped it on. Just knowing the aroma of freshly brewed coffee would soon float in the air made Harry instantly happier.

While the bacon sizzled in the pan it was almost ready to add a couple of eggs, but first Harry scooped a generous serving of Greek yoghurt into a ceramic bowl, drizzled on some honey and sprinkled a handful of fat blueberries on top. He leant his hip against the counter and kept an eye on the hob so he wouldn’t burn his breakfast; he ate a large spoonful of yoghurt and gave a satisfied hum. The berries burst in his mouth leaving the needed freshness behind but still, his body needed something salty and hearty. Once the bacon was crispy and the eggs fried just the way he liked them, he plated the food, took his coffee which had finished dripping from the machine and carried them outside to the terrace.

The sun shone brightly from atop the clear sky and the light breeze cooled the air. After all, it was only the beginning of May and even in Los Angeles, the weather wasn’t always as warm as many people believed it to be. The fresh air and proper food were exactly what Harry needed to get back to the land of the living. After he had finished his meal, he took the fluffy throw that was folded on the corner of the rattan sofa he was sitting on and wrapped it around his bare legs. He reached to grab a pair of sunglasses from Gemma’s collection that was laying on the low table and covered his eyes with them. Then Harry reclined in his seat and closed his eyes.

His thoughts drifted to the previous night. It was so embarrassing to remember next to nothing of what had happened since they’d left Niall’s house. They had been catching up there and had a couple of drinks, and most likely, a few after that.

Shit.

This hasn’t happened since adolescence. Well, after wild and crazy nights there might have been few gaps in his memory but now it seemed like the whole night had been erased. And what was even more concerning, Harry had a feeling that something significant had happened, but he just wasn’t able to dig it out from his memory. Hopefully, he hadn’t done anything too daft otherwise Jeff would kill him, that’s for sure. Harry loved him, of course, but sometimes he was just so incredibly uptight and nitpicky about everything that might be considered a threat to Harry’s public image. Ok, it was his job as his manager, but jeez, he should relax sometimes too.

His phone started to ring, breaking the silence. With a little sigh, Harry dug up the phone from his pocket and checked the caller ID before accepting the call.

“Hi, Niall.” He greeted the lad who definitely didn’t have any trouble relaxing and was carefree all the time. It was also one of those characteristics Harry had always admired about Niall; his positive attitude with everything.

“How’s your head, H?” Niall cackled on the phone way too loudly and without bothering to wait for the answer, he immediately continued. “Seems you had fun last night then.”

“Umm-mm.” Harry mumbled switching his phone on speaker hoping Niall’s voice would sound less ear-splitting on that. “Good. Just good.”

“Nothing to tell me then?” By tone alone, Harry was able to telepathically see the shit-eating grin Niall had on his face, and he already dreaded what was about to come next. Something in Niall’s tone told him there definitely was. Now he just has to wait. He wasn’t going to give Niall the satisfaction of making Harry beg him to spill the beans. No fucking way.

“Mmm… No…” Harry reached for his coffee cup and took a large gulp hoping it would blow away the headache he could feel creeping back in.

“Who was the bloke you were clinging to on a trolley in West Hollywood?”

“What…?” The question loudly escaped Harry’s lips before he was able to prevent it. The same thing happened to the coffee now splashing out of the mug and straight into his lap.

“Shit…” He mumbled and swiped the excess liquid off his shorts before it seeped through enough to soak his lap, but his mind was already circulating around Niall’s words. Flashbacks from his teen years were flashing in his mind. He was sitting in a “borrowed” supermarket trolley, but now instead of High Street Holmes Chapel, he was wheeling along Sunset Boulevard.

And apparently with some unknown guy at least for Harry.

It all made his stomach knot and this time it wasn’t just the booze talking. If Niall hadn’t been there while it happened, as it seems because he was asking who the lad had been, it could only mean one thing; there were photos.

Harry already saw his life flashing before his eyes because now it was certain; Jeff was definitely going to kill him.

“C’mon, H, you can tell me all the dirty details! You guys looked good together.” Niall persuaded from the other end of the line. Perhaps Harry would have told him if there had been something to talk about but right now it wasn’t quite that simple. He’d either have to cook up some convincing lie quickly or confess to Niall he might have had a teeny tiny blackout.

“Umm… Yeah. I—mmm…” Telling lies on the spot has never been Harry’s forte, and it wasn’t now either as he noticed he was muttering something unintelligible to his friend.

“H…?”

“Yeah?” Harry tried to sound breezy, but Niall didn’t buy it this time either.

“What’s going on?” Harry hated how well Niall was able to read him, even on the phone.

“Mmm—” Harry cleared his throat as he felt his nerves being pulled at with little invisible tugs. Finally, he breathed out a hasty confession “There’s an itty-bitty gap in my memory from last night…”

“Alright,” Niall responded, the laughter audible in his voice and Harry hated him at that moment. “and how ‘itty-bitty’ is the time gap we are talking about now?”

“I remember there were some tequila shots at your house…” Harry finally replied, pacing his words slowly. Even the mention of tequila made his guts flip in a nasty way. He reached for the big bottle of water placed next to the sofa and twisted the cap off. The water was way too warm to taste good, it must have been there since yesterday, but it was still enough to keep the contents of his stomach at bay. Niall had started up again with his obnoxious cackle and Harry wanted to kick him in the bollocks so he would stop it.

“It’s not funny, Niall.” Harry retorted. It might be later, but definitely right now, not so much. But as if Harry’s saying it had quieted Niall.

“Oh, yes, it is. Thanks to you, I’m probably gonna miss my next strike.” Niall laughed even louder if that was possible.

“You’re golfing?” Harry wondered aloud in amazement knitting his brows lightly. “How the hell are you able to that? I’ve been dying all day long, praying it would be a fast and pain-free end, and you are outside in the blinding sun fucking golfing?”

“Fresh air would do miracles for you too,” Niall announced without really answering any of Harry’s questions. Not that he was really expecting an answer. But there were other questions he absolutely needed ones for; and preferably very soon. Harry was positive he had numerous missed calls from Jeff already waiting for him but before he could even consider calling him back, he had to find out what the fuck happened last night. Niall didn’t seem to notice Harry’s problems and just kept chatting meaninglessly.

“What happened last night?” Harry finally breathed out when he couldn’t hold the question back anymore and as expected, it was responded to by Niall’s cheerful laughter. Guess it was funny to him, but Harry was starting to feel a bit annoyed and snapped at Niall, “I’m fucking serious, Niall. I need to know!”

“Don’t blame me if you got too drunk, H.” His best friend preached.

“You’re the reason why I took the tequila shots in the first place, Niall. So, perhaps you’re not as innocent as you think.” Harry reminded him.

“Well…” Harry swears he heard Niall shrugging his shoulders on the other end of the line.

“Just fucking tell me! Please.” He added so he wouldn’t sound too rude.

“After we left my house, we went to a bar and then you disappeared.” Niall started.

“And…?” Harry asked impatiently when the Irish guy paused his story.

“That’s it. I don’t know where you went. You said you were going to the toilet and I didn’t see you after that.”

“What?!?” Harry cried out stunned. “And you just let me go?”

“What else should I have done? I called you when I hadn’t seen you for a while and you said you were on your way to some club.”

“Again, you let me go?” Harry repeatedly rubbed the back of his neck.

“Why wouldn’t I? You’re an adult man, believe it or not.”

“Yeah and drunk as a skunk apparently.”

“You seemed alright to me. Over the years I’ve seen you in much worse condition, you know. Also, in that picture, you looked like you’d had quite a few drinks and were tipsy, but nothing else. Maybe it was just the tequila that took your memory.”

“Speaking of the photo…” Harry bit his lip and tried to encourage himself to hear the ugly truth. “How bad was it?”

“It wasn’t bad. You were just very clingy, the way you tend to be when you’re drunk. Hanging on his neck like a koala bear but you two looked cute together.”

“You said something about the trolley…?” Harry carefully asked, pinching his lower lip between his fingers. This next answer he was dreading the most, and he closed his eyes while awaiting Niall’s answer which seemed to take an eternity.

“Yeah, apparently you were on that party hopper trolley, the one that goes around in WeHo. At least your fans seem to think so.”

“Oh!” Relief went through his body when he heard Niall’s reply. “You’ve been lurking on what they’ve been posting?”

“Of course, I had to know where you’d been since you never answered my calls after that.”

“Hmm… Ok.” Harry didn’t know how to respond anymore.

“Look, H. I gotta go now; Shawn is giving me stink eye cos it’s my strike next. Just wanted to check that you got home safely. Talk to you later!”

“Bye...” Was all Harry had time to say before the line went dead. This wasn’t anything new, so he didn’t bother to analyse the quick hang up.

Instead, he opened Instagram on his phone.

***

“I can’t believe you didn’t know who he was!” Zayn laughed at Louis who was half sitting and half laying on the slate-coloured couch that has served as his bed for the last six days while he has been visiting with them.

“How would I have known that?” He retorted to his best friend maybe a bit too feistily. Luckily Zayn knew him better than any other person and didn’t seem to be offended at all; more likely he was even more amused.

“You asked me to take a picture of you two.” Zayn reminded him. “You live in England; he is from England. I bet he’s an even bigger name there than he is here, and he is here too. Even I remember him from the time I still lived in London. Plus, you have a ton of little sisters who definitely know who he is. So, of course, I thought you knew who he was.” Zayn pointed out. Well, he wasn’t wrong, but it didn’t change the fact Louis hadn’t any idea who he had spent the good part of the last night with, except the guy had introduced himself as Harry and had been hot as hell.

Maybe Louis should have felt embarrassed for not recognising him, but he was mainly feeling disappointed. Not because he had met Harry Styles, who apparently was a really big name in the music scene, but that is why he already knew he wouldn’t have any chance of seeing him again. And Louis had really, really liked him and not to mention he had managed to develop a wee crush on him last night. But maybe it was for the best after all. Now he could stop fantasizing that anything could or would happen again.

“There are thousands of artists in England and I don’t know all of them. I just thought he was cute and wanted something to remember him by. It was also meant to be a private photo.” Louis said sourly. The soft leather gave slight resistance under his weight as he hoisted himself up a little bit to reach the can of Coke from the table in front of him. It had started to warm a little but was still fizzy enough to be refreshing.

“Whoops…!” Zain grinned but didn’t show any signs of regret for posting the picture into his Insta stories because it was now spreading around the internet like an uncontrolled wildfire. It was a good thing he hadn’t tagged Louis in it, but apparently it had forced him to go private since Harry’s fans had started to DM him constantly. Louis couldn’t say he felt sorry for him. He made his bed and now it was time to lay in it.

“You could even try to look like you’re sorry.” Louis glared at Zayn who was still smirking at him for being foolish enough to not know who Harry was.

“I didn’t think much about it when they asked me to AirDrop the picture.” Immediately he realized he had said something he wasn’t supposed to and jumped up from the chair he had been sprawled on.

“Hold on!” Louis yelled with a magnitude that could probably get the attention of the whole damn neighbourhood. At least, it had caused Liam to appear in the doorway wearing only a pair of joggers that hung so low Louis had to quickly avert his gaze, otherwise, he would see something he probably shouldn’t, and Louis aimed his focus back to Zayn. “What did you just say?”

“Nothing…” Zayn shrugged nonchalantly and tried to escape the room.

“Nah mate, I’m pretty sure you mentioned something about airdropping my pic to someone else. You’re fucking with me, yeah?” Louis asked with narrowed eyes.

“Well—” Zayn grimaced while glancing towards Liam like he was begging him to help. He didn’t say anything but sauntered into the living room and sat on the armrest of the chair Zayn had occupied just seconds ago. His pants were still hung at an alarmingly low level exposing his extremely fit, tanned body. Despite his killer body, Liam has never been the type Louis was attracted to but clearly it was for Zayn who was openly gawking at his husband.

“That’s your answer? Well…” Louis jumped up to mimic Zayn’s weak voice.

“Ok, I didn’t think. You happy now?” Zayn snapped, widening his hands out to his sides. “The girls on the trolley just casually asked if I could drop the picture of Harry to them too. I thought he knew them, and I didn’t know who he was.”

“Oi, wait a second now! Just two minutes ago you accused me of not being able to recognise him, and now you’re saying you didn’t know who he was either?” Something wasn’t adding up in this story and Louis wanted to find out what it was.

“I recognized him soon after, you still wouldn’t have an idea who he was if I hadn’t told you.” Zayn accused him.

“Who are you talking about?” Liam interrupted them.

“Harry Styles,” Zayn said. “Seems our Louis here spent all last night with him and had no idea who he actually was. Now he has an enormous crush on him and is grumpy because he won’t see him again.”

“I like Harry. He’s always very nice and polite.” Liam said casually as he picked up the water bottle from the coffee table.

“You know him?!?” The other two men said wide-eyed and in unison.

“Yeah, he’s a regular that comes to our gym,” Liam stated like there was nothing weird about it and took a sip from the bottle.

“Why haven't you told me that before?” Zayn asked arms crossed on his chest.

“Uh oh,” Louis muttered quietly. He could have kept on arguing with Zayn, but Louis was curious to hear more about Liam’s Harry Styles connection. He reversed his way back to the couch and fixed his eyes on the now squabbling blokes in front of him.

Zayn, just like Louis, usually wore all black and this day wasn’t any exception; tight, ripped jeans and a faded band t-shirt were his choice for today. His hair was dark, almost black and numerous tattoos coloured his olive-toned complexion, some of them were actually inked by Louis. The bad boy image was completed with various piercings. But the deep brown bedroom eyes and the bone structure (those plastic surgeons used as a model for ‘after’ pictures) was enough to make women fall into him every day, but Zayn only had eyes for Liam ever since they had met for the first time a few years back.

If Zayn was considered rebellious on his looks alone, Liam was the total opposite. His clothes followed the latest fashion trends and his brown hair was always neatly cut and styled. Hazelnut eyes made him look like a puppy, soft and kind, and Louis was quite sure he waxed his eyebrows too. Not to mention the smooth hairless chest that was currently exposed for everyone. Even the thought of someone ripping off his chest hair made Louis wince and bring him back to the situation at hand.

“You know I can’t gossip about the ‘famouses’ who use the gym,” Liam explained agonizingly.

“But you just did.” Zayn stared at him with incredulous narrowed eyes.

“No—“

“And not only to me but to Louis too.” Zayn continued fingers angrily tapping against his left elbow.

“I— I’m just gonna get some fresh air.” Louis snatched the pack of ciggies from the table without bothering to check if it was his or Zayn’s and ran out of the door. They have always smoked the same brand, so it didn’t matter in that way either. Now his only thought was to get out of the apartment before the war began.

Louis ran down the two flights of stairs, pack and lighter in hand and right after he was outside, he dug one out placing it between his lips. After a few attempts, he was able to light it using his white Polari t-shirt as a shield from the wind. He sat on the stairs near the door, elbows propped against his knees, cigarette in his left hand. The calming smoke burned his lungs and the relaxed sensation filled him more and more with every drag he took. He didn’t rush and after a small break, he smoked another one.

He stumped the fag against the grey bitumen and reminded himself to take the butts with him before he’d go upstairs again. He estimated probably fifteen minutes or so would be enough time and he could go back in safely. Zayn and Liam’s fights were always quick but they were numerous throughout the day; and now after a week, it was getting tiresome. Although, Louis wasn’t surprised about their showdowns; so different they were. But they also were happy, and that was all that mattered in the long run.

When he finally went upstairs, he had two pairs of eyes studying him the moment he stepped inside.

“Good, you’re back. We have a plan.” Zayn said and from experience, Louis knew that never meant anything good.

*

Why did I ever agree to this, Louis asked inwardly, once again, while he was running on the treadmill to warm himself up. He swiped his already sweaty forehead with the back of his hand and prepared to increase the speed one more time. He knew Liam was observing him from the other side of the gym so even if he felt tempted, he just couldn’t give up right now. He wasn’t ready to hear all the chastising his surrender would bring.

And anyway, he had a mission in place too; although it felt quite impossible to complete.

He still couldn’t believe he had let Liam, and especially Zayn who for sure was the one behind this stupid plan, to persuade him into doing this. First, he hated going to the gym. And even more, there was only a very slim chance that the guy from Saturday night, Harry, would even come here. Liam had said he usually comes if he’s in the city but whether he was still in LA was another question. Louis just had to wait and keep running apparently.

He still couldn’t understand how someone could honestly say they enjoyed doing this. Louis had been on the treadmill barely five minutes and he was already so fucking bored. Not even the music blasting from his earbuds helped so he tried to keep his mind busy in other ways and for some reason his ‘other ways’ seemed to be the same for the past couple of days; thinking of a certain Harry Styles.

The memories he had weren’t as clear as he hoped they would be, thanks to the tequila shots in some gay club they’d ended up at. Louis was a bit embarrassed to admit how much time he had spent the previous days searching the various social media platforms and gathering information about Harry; only to notice he, in fact, was one of the main topics of the discussions. Why was Harry in a gay club? Who was the guy he was seen with on the party trolley? Was that guy the same guy Harry was later seen with in that club? Was Harry gay after all?

The last one was the question Louis wanted the answer to most because he had no idea what to think. Half of his fans seemed to be certain that he was in fact not straight, while the rest of them were assured that not only was he straight, but some kind of lothario too.

Louis himself was just fucking confused. He was quite positive there had been some sort of mutual interest between them but then again, it could just have been the side effects from his alcohol consumption. They hadn’t kissed, that Louis was sure about. But he had wanted to; Harry was fit.

Asking for Liam and Zayn’s opinions hadn’t been helpful either. Zayn was convinced Harry was gay but Liam, who actually kind of knew him said his gaydar hadn’t vibrated so far and to hear that had felt like a slap in his face. Maybe Louis’ feelings had been visible in his expression because, despite his feelings, he had promised to help Louis, or more likely forced him into this gym farce. Louis was sure he did it for Zayn and as a consequence, he was torturing himself on the treadmill.

The moving death trap finally beeped as a sign that his warm-up time had come to an end and Louis happily jumped off it. While wiping the sweat off his face he properly looked around for the first time. If gyms, in general, weren’t his place to be, this particular one was even less so. All the people around him looked like they had been ripped from the pages of Vogue; flawless makeup and every strand of hair styled perfectly, not to mention the expensive clothing brands they were sporting.

There was such a remarkable difference between him and the rest of the gym crowd. He stood out like a raven alongside peacocks. Over the years he had been used to it, he really was, but sometimes he would have just wanted to blend in with others and be invisible. Obviously, it was his own choice to wear eyeliner and dye his hair black, so maybe he should just accept that it would always garner people’s attention. His many tattoos and piercings didn’t help with that either.

He sighed and tried to ignore everything going on around him. He calmed his mind and walked to the section where a cluster of dumbbells was arranged in front of the room-wide mirror looking easy enough to start with. To kill some more time he was just taking a sip from his water bottle when a short murmur trickled throughout the room and the atmosphere radically changed. Instinctively Louis knew it was Harry, he couldn’t say why he knew it without even seeing the other guy, but he just did. In the same way, he knew if he screwed this up he would never get another chance.

It was now or never.

But now that the time was up, he had no idea what he should do to get Harry’s attention; or even more, to make Harry talk to him. Louis silently watched as he walked briskly in the direction of the treadmills. He nodded briefly to the beautiful blonde next to him before focusing on the control panel of the equipment. His water bottle was already in the rack and a small towel neatly folded on the handrail. He was wearing dark grey athletic shorts with a black hoodie with the text ‘Don’t Trip’ on the back and he had the hood pulled over his head.

Probably in an effort to avoid the stares from creeps like him, Louis thought unamused.

He turned his gaze away only to notice Liam on the other side of the room waving his arms in the air. Louis assumed he was trying to signal him to approach Harry but he looked more like a crazy beekeeper chasing his flying insects. Louis felt it better to ignore him this time so he wouldn’t be associated with Liam’s lunatic gestures. He was probably able to gain the same title without any help from his friend anyway.

Louis was trying to keep himself busy by doing some stretches and still strongly avoiding the organized line of various sized dumbbells. Finally, he gave up and picked up the set that looked suitable for his needs. He wasn’t a newbie in the gym generally speaking, but it definitely had been years since his last visit. He had always preferred outdoor sports like football, and even jogging in the fresh air would be ten times better than doing so on the treadmill. Maybe those were the reasons he somehow overestimated his strength, or more like his muscle endurance.

Normally, he would have just meekly changed the dumbbells he had for lighter ones. But it was just his luck that this was the exact moment when Harry noticed him, and he had no other choice than to keep on working out with those far too heavy weights until his face was crimson from the exertion. The first clue he had been caught was the unsteady noise from the treadmill and Louis saw Harry stumbling badly, fighting to keep his balance. He had pulled the hood down perhaps to see better and was now clearly peering at Louis through the mirror. Louis saw him frowning with his whole face like he was thinking really hard. Then he dragged his eyes away from Louis, just to make his whole body turn towards him. It seemed to be the final nail in the coffin and Harry slid off the running belt like in a slow-motion film. At the last second, he was able to jump off and make a quasi-graceful landing on two feet after all.

Harry looked embarrassed when everyone’s eyes were back on him again, now for a different reason though. For Louis, it gave him the opportunity to drop the dumbbells on the floor as no one paid attention to him right now. Louis didn’t want to laugh at Harry, but he just couldn’t help the grin appear on his lips. The ironic ‘Don’t Trip’ hoodie definitely didn’t help the situation at all.

Of course, Harry noticed that too and blushed vigorously making Louis feel remorseful. He sent Harry an apologetic smile and for a second, he thought he would be brave and go say hi to him. But before Louis had time to act, a buff-looking guy walked up to Harry. They greeted each other familiarly, and from the way Harry soon followed him to the other room, Louis assumed the guy must have been his personal trainer. Just before Harry disappeared around the corner, he gave Louis one more questioning look and then he was gone.

That was it then, Louis thought. The whole point of coming to the gym was to try his luck to see Harry and be able to talk to him again. He had seen him, but now what? Was he supposed to carry on his unsuccessful work out session until, or more like if, Harry would appear again and they would be at square one again?

Liam has disappeared somewhere, and Louis decided to use option number two and sneak out of the gym to the locker room to collect his stuff before he would come back and see that Louis was missing. He quickly placed the weights in the same place that he found them and sprinted through the room. He saw Liam standing behind the desk in the reception area talking to a member and was easily able to get to the locker room. How he would get out of the building was another problem altogether. Not that Liam would stop him or anything but seeing the sadness in his puppy dog eyes was something Louis didn’t want to confront right now.

So, he decided to wait a bit and take a shower instead. He wasn’t that sweaty but even the thought of walking around LA in his sticky gym wear sounded vile.

Afterwards, he felt himself again. Just a final stroke of eyeliner to replace what the water had rinsed away in the shower and he was back on track. He stepped away from the mirror he was standing in front of and took a look at himself from a distance. He was a petite man, there was no denying it.

Despite actually being 5’9”, he still appeared slight and lithe to anyone who meets him. He doesn’t have an inferiority complex although he wouldn’t have minded an extra inch or two on his frame to make up for his diminutive appearance.

The addition of a grey woollen beanie that sat artfully over his black hair created the illusion of those lacking inches. He was wearing his long black skinny jeans rolled at the ankles and the same coloured t-shirt with simple black Vans. Perhaps the dark colours made him look harsh under certain lighting, but they still weren’t able to detract away the almost imperceptible sadness in his eyes that seemed to be rooted there permanently.

Whether Louis wanted it there or not.

Louis had no idea what to do next, their ‘Operation Meet Harry’ plans had never made it far enough to take into account the possibility that it wouldn’t work. In his mind, Louis had known it probably wouldn’t have worked but still hadn’t made any plans for the rest of the day. Zayn was at work just like Liam, so there was no point in going back to their flat and sitting there aimlessly awaiting their return. Not that he couldn’t find anything to do in a city like Los Angeles, he just had to find a way to get around without a car.

With a laboured sigh, Louis picked up his phone to check if there was a Wi-Fi connection he could use. Of course, there was but it needed a password to be connected. Great… Louis stuffed his dirty clothes into his small backpack and patted his pockets to feel if his wallet was where it was supposed to be. When everything was accounted for he walked toward the door, his phone still in hand. He had barely touched the handle when someone pushed the door open from the other side causing Louis’ phone to slip out of his hand and spiral down to the floor.

“Oops!” A voice said from behind the door, obviously noticing the resistance on the other side. He had a contrite smile on his lips when he walked through the threshold and Louis realized who the morbidly low-voiced culprit was.

“Hi…” He breathed out, eyes aimed at the taller guy.

“Hi!” Harry sounded more delighted, but his smile quickly faded as he noticed Louis’ phone on the ground. “Shit, is it broken?” He asked and hurried to pick it up before he had time to react.

“Shit!” The curse escaped from Louis’ lips when he saw the smashed screen of his phone in Harry’s hand and snatched it back. “You broke my fucking phone!”

“Is it just the screen?” Harry asked, craning his neck closer to take a look.

“Just the screen…?” Louis repeated flatly. Maybe it was ‘just a screen’ for Mr Money Bags, but for Louis, it would be more than just chump change he’d have to fork over to get it repaired.

“I’ll pay for it, of course.” Harry rushed to say like he was reading Louis’ thoughts. “It was my fault after all.”

“I can pay for it myself.” Louis retorted.

“Of course you can. But like I said, I broke the phone so I should pay for it.” Harry said in a convincing tone. Louis knew he should just say ‘yes’ and let Harry take care of it, but he had always been way too stubborn, and this time didn’t make any difference.

“My travel insurance will cover the repair.” Louis said and added with a friendlier tone “Thanks for the offer though.”

“Let me at least help you to find a place where you can get it fixed.” Harry pleaded.

“Fine.” Louis gave in. He really didn’t have too many options right now. His phone was smashed and had nothing else to Google the repair shops with.

“Great!” Harry sounded delighted as he walked towards the lockers. “I’ll just grab my bag and we can go.”

“Go…?” Louis frowned.

“To take care of the phone,” Harry explained and took his bag out of his locker, placing the water bottle and the towel that was hanging from his pocket inside.

“Oh, yeah. Sure.” Louis shrugged. Maybe he should be screaming internally because this had been his goal; to meet Harry again and maybe spend some more time with him. But now it all just felt bizarre.

“I’m Harry, by the way.” Harry turned and stretched his hand to introduce himself.

“I know.” Louis grinned. “We’ve kind of met before.”

“So, it’s really you then -- the guy from the pictures on Instagram.” Harry blurted out, looking slightly abashed and refused to look directly at Louis.

“I guess so.” Louis laughed. “I thought you recognized me earlier.”

“I did,” Harry said quickly. “Or I thought I did. But then I wasn’t so sure anymore.”

“Ouch.” Louis held his chest pretending to be offended. “I thought I had made an unforgettable impression. It hurts a bit to realise that wasn’t the case.”

“I’m sure you would have done. That is if I could remember everything from the whole night.” Harry winced but Louis heard the muffled laughter behind the words.

“Really?” Louis laughed. “I didn’t realise you were that drunk.”

“Tell it to my hangover the next day.”

“That bad?”

“The worst I’ve ever had,” Harry admitted shaking his head.

“Oh, that sucks,” Louis responded. “But if it helps in any way, I wasn’t feeling so hot either the next morning.”

“At the time nothing would have helped if I’m honest. But I’m beginning to feel alright now.” Harry grinned. “Now, could you please tell me your name before I have to beg for it?”

Louis cocked one eye up before responding lasciviously but thought better of it and simply stated “Louis. My name is Louis.”

“Louis.” Harry tasted the name. “I like it.”

Then Harry took Louis’ hand into his own, pressed his lips carefully on it saying, “Nice to meet you, Louis.”

And then he was gone again, disappearing around the corner.

***  
Harry made a beeline back to the locker to collect his wallet and car keys. He tried to kill some time finding them from the almost empty locker and pulling the beanie on his head had never taken so long. But right now, he needed his moment, even if it would only be 20 seconds or so, to calm his heart down and fade the blush away from his face enough to show it again. He had never kissed anyone on the hand before, maybe apart from his grandmother, and had no idea where that had even come from. It was already too late to regret it, but it didn’t alleviate any of the embarrassment at his rather formal greeting.

But he couldn’t hide in the closet any longer without being even more suspicious. He inhaled a deep breath and let the air slowly flow out through his nose the way his yoga instructor would be proud of. He wore a gentle smile on his face and just then turned to meet Louis’ gaze again.

He was leaning against the wall, his backpack placed on the floor between his legs and eyes aimed at the bag. His posture was relaxed but his teeth sunken into a ring on his lower lip told another story. When he heard Harry shuffling towards him, he raised his gaze and gave him a timid smile.

“Ready?” Harry braved, cutting the silence between them.

“Yeah.” Louis nodded as he picked his backpack up and opened the locker room door, letting Harry go out first. They walked through the reception area towards the entrance in a rather uncomfortable silence.

Harry said his goodbyes to the gym staff behind the desk and was halfway outside when he heard Louis say “I’ll text you later, Liam.” Harry was just about to turn around with curiosity to get a look at who he was talking to when he noticed a man with a telephoto lens camera standing on the other side of the street.

“Fuck…” Harry mumbled halting in place, and as a result of his sudden stop, Louis bumped against his back.

“Sorry.” Louis apologized but Harry just shook his head at him and pushed him back inside.

“No, no. It was all my fault.”

“What’s going on?”

“I totally forgot Jeff hired a pap for today to take pictures of me leaving the gym.” Harry told him and added soon “For promo.”

“Okay…” Louis frowned, still looking a bit confused and Harry couldn’t blame him for it. Maybe he’d give him a better explanation later but now wasn’t the time.

“Yeah, ok.” Harry talked more to himself now. “We need a plan.”

“Plan…?”

“To get you into the car without that pap noticing you.”

“Wouldn’t it just be easier to take my phone to the repair shop on my own?”

“No!” Harry almost shouted.

“No?”

“Well, yeah it would be easier, but I don’t want you to do that,” Harry said firmly.

“You don’t? Are you sure?” Louis double-checked.

“Yeah, I am,” Harry replied slowly, looking Louis straight into his eyes, in a moment of boldness. He saw a small flicker in Louis’ eyes telling him that maybe they were on the same page after all. Although Harry had no idea what that page was, he was just hoping he was going to find out later. But now, they needed a plan and he repeated it to Louis too.

“Let’s think,” Louis said thoughtfully. “What was your original plan? Before I came along.”

“I was just supposed to go to the juice shop across the street, buy a smoothie and walk back to my car.” Harry explained.

“And where is your car parked?” Louis wanted to know next.

“It’s the black one right there.” Harry pointed to a gleaming black Tesla parked just a few metres away from them.

“Good,” Louis said and then paused for a moment to think, at least that’s what Harry thought he was doing. He looked so pretty when his blue eyes squinted slightly, creating tiny crinkles around the corners of his eyes.

“How’s this sound?” Louis suddenly spoke again which caused Harry to drop the car keys he was fiddling with. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you.” He grinned at Harry, looking anything but regretful.

“So, I thought we could use your original plan and just add a couple of things to it,” Louis continued. “You could go get the smoothie and keep the pap’s attention on you. I could have the car keys and at the proper moment I could sneak inside your car and wait for you inside.”

“You want my car keys?” Harry smirked as he arched his brows.

“Maybe that sounded a bit too forward. I didn’t think about it enough.” A cute giggle escaped from Louis and fuck, Harry would have given him the whole damn car after he heard that if only he just asked.

“Of course I’ll give you the keys, you wanker.” Harry nudged him gently on the shoulder, causing Louis to smile widely in response.

“Ok, great. Are you ready, then?” Louis asked when Harry dropped the keys into his palm.

“Yeah. Good luck!” He said to Louis and just barely restrained himself from giving him a kiss on his cheek. Instead, he walked to the door and pushed it open with enough grandiosity to fully catch the pap’s attention.

As he strode across the street to the Juice Bar he began to hear the familiar clicking of the camera. Usually, he hated these aspects of his fame but now he wanted to keep the lens aimed solely on him so Louis could get into the car without being noticed, or in the worst case -- photographed. Harry was just about to enter the shop when he saw the flash of the car lights as a sign the central locking was opened. He quickly looked at the guy behind the camera, but he hadn’t paid any attention to it.

But Harry wasn’t going to take any chances and faked that he dropped his wallet on the ground and bent over to pick it up. He was quite sure the picture of his arse would soon be plastered on some online tabloid but for once, he couldn’t care less. He stepped inside the shop and ordered two of his favourite smoothies, and while waiting he signed a piece of paper with a short message to a fan who had shyly approached him. This time Harry politely declined to take the photo but gave her a big hug instead. Harry loved his fans, he truly did but sometimes he hoped he could just be a regular person again. This one had been really nice and after the hug, she had walked away blushing furiously and Harry had let out a relieved sigh.

When he got his drinks, he walked out preparing for the pap again. Suddenly he felt more nervous than he thought he would feel. As he stepped out of the door he looked across the road to see if he could spot Louis inside the car and fortunately he couldn’t. One bright green smoothie in each hand he looked seemingly cool but inside he was almost shaking. He couldn’t even explain why he was feeling like this. Was it because of Louis himself or the knowledge that he would be caught in his car with the same guy again? Either way, it would cause too much speculation to figure it out right now. He had to play it cool.

He sidled up to the car easily but when he placed one of the smoothies on the roof to open the door, the damn cup fell and was about to spill its contents down the car’s exterior but Harry’s last-minute reflexive save prevented the catastrophe. His hands were ridiculously shaky when he tried to open the door, now balancing both drinks in one hand and cursing himself even more for not taking the drink tray offered by the cashier.

”Why didn’t you take a tray?” Was Louis’ first question when he appeared from behind the front seat after Harry had finally made his way inside the car and drove away smoothly leaving the pap behind.

”I thought it would cause questions as to why I was carrying two drinks.” Harry explained even though he knew it didn’t make sense.

”You still had two drinks.” Louis reminded him. “The difference was that now I had to worry if that green slimy-looking shit is going to spread everywhere.”

“I made it anyway. Here...” Harry said and handed the other one to Louis who had climbed into the front passenger seat once the coast was clear.

“I almost wish you hadn’t.” He winced at the smoothie but took it anyway.

“Just taste it. It’s not as bad as you may think. And besides, it’s quite refreshing after a workout.”

“Is this a good time to confess that I really wasn’t working out?” Louis glanced at him cautiously, teeth playing again with the lip ring.

“You weren’t? Was I just hallucinating when I saw you in the gym lifting weights a bit out of your range?” Harry smirked.

“Well… I was there, yes. But maybe mainly because I kinda sorta had a mission.” Louis confessed as he wrapped his soft pink lips around the paper straw and began to take a tiny sip from his cup.

“What kind of mission did you have?” Harry asked even though he thought, or should he say hoped he knew, what Louis was implying.

“Do you really have to ask?”

Harry shrugged, smiling inwardly.

“Ok. You really want me to say it aloud, don’t you?” Louis asked, clearly amused and Harry just raised his eyebrow in answer, making Louis sigh exaggeratedly. “My friend Liam, who is married to my best friend Zayn, works in the gym you go to. I had no idea about that, neither did Zayn. And may I add there might have been a little fray between the marrieds after he found out.” Louis grinned.

“Uh oh.” Harry winced.

“Exactly!” Louis yelled. “That was my exact reaction when I heard that too.”

“What happened then?”

“I don’t know. I snuck out of the flat for a fag.”

“No, I mean how did you end up going to the gym then.”

“Oh,” Louis said embarrassed. “Well they, besides millions of other people, obviously knew that I had met you. Although, I didn’t know I had just met “the Harry Styles” until Zayn pointed it out to me the following day. I just thought I had met a very interesting bloke and if I’m honest, I was disappointed to hear who you were.”

That revelation felt like a blow to his chest. “Why?” Harry hadn’t expected to hear that. Although, it kind of felt refreshing.

“Because if you were famous, I knew I wouldn’t get a chance to see you again.”

“I think we did anyway.”

“Yeah, thanks to Liam,” Louis said. “Even though I’m quite sure it was Zayn’s idea to get me to the gym and Liam had no choice than to accept it to keep the peace.”

“So, you came to the gym to find me?” Harry asked, eyes twinkling with curiosity. With any other person, he probably would have thought how creepy that was but now he was just happy to hear it.

“Yeah. Sorry. I know I’m a horrible person.”

“No, you’re not,” Harry said firmly.

“You think stalking someone isn’t a horrible thing to do?”

“Well, I do—“

“I was basically stalking you so that officially makes me a creepy little shit.”

“Look—“ Harry started and paused because he didn’t know how to tell Louis he had been ecstatic to see him, without sounding too needy. “Ok, yes. Generally speaking, stalking would get you on my — and my body guard’s — shit list —“

“I knew it!” Louis said a satisfied grin on his lips.

“But I guess I can let it go this time.”

“And why is that?” Harry felt Louis’ eyes burning hotly into his, making his cheeks gradually flush a deep rose colour.

“Because I like you.” Harry breathed out and after a sharp inhale he quickly continued before he would lose the courage again. “And I wanted to see you again too.”

“You like me?” Louis asked. “Like, as a…mate?”

“Not as a mate,” Harry said and didn’t dare to look at Louis again. This was probably the fastest he had ever outed himself to a stranger and it could have dire consequences if his instincts had been all wrong.

“Are you saying what I think you’re saying?”

“Depends…” Harry replied, biting his lip and still keeping his eyes strictly on the road. What if he had misread all the signs? What if his faded memories (what little he had from them) from the weekend had all been false? What if Louis wanted to just be his friend, nothing else. Or if he even fancied guys at all. Harry had a horrible feeling he had fucked up really big this time. His hands were sweating as the silence continued and Harry definitely didn’t have any words to cut it now.

Suddenly a voice filled the air but it wasn’t Louis’ like Harry would have hoped for, but instead, the steely navigator voice which was giving them their final instructions as they approached the repair shop. Harry focused on following her orders, and a quietly sat Louis let him.

When they reached the front of the shop, Harry wasn’t sure if he was relieved or disappointed. Without thought, he snatched the busted phone Louis had placed in the empty cup holder and mumbled something vague excusing himself from the vehicle.

“You can’t come!” Harry shouted when he saw Louis was about to open the passenger door sounding even a bit too rude for his usual politeness and immediately regretted his choice of words. “I mean, I’ll just take the phone inside and will be back in two minutes. There’s no need for both of us there, you know, fan sightings or the shop owner could sneak a picture of us together.” Harry rambled on and then without looking behind him, he slammed the door closed and ran inside.

Harry greeted the repair technician and he quickly explained the problem, although it was clearly visible what had happened. He paid the bill even though he knew Louis wouldn’t be happy with it, but Harry felt it was his responsibility to do so. He was the reason the phone had dropped in the first place.

In fact, Louis getting angry that he had paid for the repair of the screen was the least of his problems right now. Somehow, he had to find the right words to express himself and tell Louis he indeed was into guys, and especially into him. But the years in the closet, even if he lately had been budging the door slightly open, had made him insecure in these types of situations. So far, his flings and short relationships, if you could even call them that, had been found in the same circles and with similar situations as he had; other celebrities who were in the closet too. At least to the general public. He knew it would be too risky to even consider starting anything with someone non-famous, and now he had not only already outed himself, but he also lost all ability to think straight (pun intended) because of his major crush.

Shit. Harry was fucked.

***

Louis sat on a tall bar stool and quietly observed Harry halving ripe cherry tomatoes and dropping them in two low-rimmed bowls which were already home to some sort of salad leaves that most likely had some fancy name but Louis had no idea what it might be. To him, they all looked — and tasted — same and if he was completely honest, he barely ever bought them. His mom would have been very disappointed but even she hadn’t been able to make Louis change his mind and now here he was, stuck in Harry’s kitchen and it seriously looked like his lunch today would be some kind of rabbit food.

Well, he wasn’t exactly stuck here. He had very much followed Harry first to the car, and then here into Harry’s house soon after a short stop to drop his phone off at the repair shop, where it would be delivered here later. When Harry had relayed that information as he climbed back into the car, the protesting words had been playing on the tip of Louis’ tongue. He didn’t know why he had given up so easily this time but after sighing internally he had just given Harry a sheepish smile with faint ‘Ok’. Maybe it had been the knowledge this would give him some extra time with Harry before their paths would be severed again.

Realistically, his words wouldn’t have made any difference anyway. The car had already returned to the main road and was flying towards the Hollywood Hills. Despite Harry’s sweet smile and friendly face, the final part of the drive had been slightly odd. Louis wasn’t sure if it was because Harry already regretted coming out to him.

At least Louis was almost sure Harry had implied he wasn’t totally straight…

But the silence in a car had been strained, or perhaps charged would be a better word to describe it. It hasn’t been awkward, but the air inside the car had been so thick with something and Louis didn’t know what to think about it at all.

Eventually, the car stopped in front of a massive metal gate that Harry opened using a remote attached to the sun visor. He parked the car in the garage between a brand new Range Rover and a bloody Harley Davidson. While he was fawning over the bike, Louis couldn’t help but notice that these two definitely weren’t the only motor vehicles parked in there. Louis, on some level, had understood what Harry’s celebrity status might mean but until now he hadn’t realized what that really came with. But here in the underground garage, it finally started to become clear.

Not to even mention the house itself, in all of its grand mid-century modern glory.

Once they had entered Harry’s house, he had left Louis alone downstairs and rushed to the shower located upstairs, mumbling something about the gym and sweat. Louis wasn’t able to fully comprehend the sentence of garbled words but got the idea. Not five minutes later Harry had appeared behind him on the large terrace, where Louis had wandered out to, still trying to digest everything around him. Louis focused his attention on Harry, who was now smelling like orange and looking cute as a button with his damp curls and dimpled smile. Louis had barely restrained himself from poking his finger into the deep craters that sat in Harry’s cheeks or doing something even worse like pushing him against the formidable glass terrace rail and kissing him senseless.

Harry had been completely unaware of Louis’ dirty thoughts and just suggested something about having a light lunch. Perhaps Louis’ wandering mind had betrayed him at that moment and without any thought, he had uttered some sort of agreement to the plan.

And now Louis was sitting in Harry’s kitchen watching as he made them a lunch Louis didn’t necessarily want to eat but the reality of it was that he couldn’t say no to Harry again if he tried. But the good side of this cooking thing was that it seemed to relax Harry and he was happily chatting about the Niçoise salad he was preparing as he dropped three eggs into the boiling water and set the timer.

“Do you like to cook?” Harry asked, smiling when he picked up something that suspiciously looked like green beans.

“Not really.” Louis laughed, admiring Harry’s knife skills while he chopped up the vegetables. “My specialities are curry takeaways and Domino’s delivery.”

“You don’t cook?” This time Harry stopped and looked at Louis with wide eyes looking slightly horrified. “At all?”

“Well, I can make decent toast and an excellent cup of tea. Pot noodles have also been quite successful so far.” Louis grinned. Harry giggled at the admission, but Louis saw he wanted to say something more but at the last moment decided not to.

“How did you end up in LA?” He asked instead. “I know you might have told me that already, but you know…” Harry bit his lip looking uncertain.

“It’s ok,” Louis assured. “I’m on me holiday. Gonna fly back home at the end of next week.”

“Oh.” Harry said and Louis couldn’t tell if the ‘oh’ was a delighted or a disappointed one. “So, you’re staying with Liam here then?”

“Technically I’m here to see Zayn, and Liam comes as a bonus,” Louis told drawing figures with his forefinger on the worktop.

“You mentioned him earlier, Zayn I mean.”

“Yeah, he’s my best friend. He moved here a couple of years ago after he met Liam in The Bahamas and they got married a few weeks later. This is the first time I’ve had the chance to meet him since then—” Louis explained and just then he realized what he was actually doing.

“What is it, Louis?” Harry asked, big green eyes aimed towards Louis who was sitting on the stool biting his lip nervously.

“Nothing…”

“You can tell me.”

“I just realised how shitty a friend I am.” Louis grimaced, dropping his feet onto the floor. “I haven’t seen him for ages and this is already the second time that I’ve ditched him for you, you know.”

“Do you not want to be here? I could give you a ride back to your friends?” Harry said in a tone that lacked any discernible effect.

“No!” Louis blurted before he had time to stop himself. “I mean yes, I want to be here. I mean only if you want me to be here too, of course. But now I feel guilty for doing it.”

“What if Zayn was visiting you in England, and let’s imagine he met Liam during that time… Wouldn’t you want him to spend time with him?” Harry slipped the question in before he had time to think it over. Maybe he didn’t mean to compare his and Louis’ situation to Zayn and Liam’s but that’s exactly what it sounded like.

Louis couldn’t help but stare at him and feel the frequency that was vibrating between them again, and even stronger than earlier in the car. Only the soft knocks of the eggs in the saucepan from the boiling water that batted them around, alongside their heavy breathing were audible in the kitchen. Harry had frozen in place, but Louis’ feet seemed to be moving by themselves.

The timer beeped, cutting the silence, but their eyes never unlocked from each other. Not even when Harry hastily scooped the eggs from the saucepan and dropped them in the ice bath waiting on the worktop beside the burner. He shoved the empty pot further on the stove and turned his whole body to face Louis who was now only a couple of steps away from him.

Louis took one step forward and Harry stepped one foot backwards. Forward. Backward. Forward. Backward. Until Harry was leant against the worktop, hands clasped against the edge and rested just beside the soft lines of his hips, his panicked eyes strictly aimed at Louis. His chest was heaving noticeably and if Louis had dared to take a closer look, he was sure could have seen the telltale sign of a growing bulge in Harry’s shorts.

Louis stopped in front of him. He had no idea where his courage suddenly came from. Maybe it was the look in Harry’s eyes that gravitated him closer to where he was caging Harry against the kitchen worktop but still avoided touching him in any way. Just then he stopped and raised his chin so he was face to face with Harry.

“What does it depend on, Harry?” Louis asked. Harry’s face contorted in confusion. “In the car, you said you liked me but didn’t clarify what you meant, you just said ‘depends’. What did you mean?” Louis pushed.

“Erm. I, uhh, well, I, erm” Harry scratched the back of his head while he stuttered to explain what he meant. “I guess it depends on how you would answer that same question if I asked you if you liked me as just a mate, or not,” Harry replied all the while looking down at a knot in the wood grain of the kitchen floorboards.

“I wanna kiss you,” Louis announced in a tone that he barely recognized as his own, at the same time that Harry snapped his head up to the confession. “I’m gonna count to five. If you haven’t said no by the time I’ve reached those gorgeous lips, I will do it. Clear?” Louis said to Harry who nodded slightly and still appeared like a deer in headlights.

“One.” Louis started the countdown.

“Two.” He continued watching Harry who was licking his plump lips nervously.

“Three,” Louis said placing his hands next to Harry’s on the worktop, still avoiding any physical contact.

“Four.” Louis brought his hands to Harry’s and slid his thumbs over the backs of his hands, brushing the smooth skin for the first time and sensing the warmth radiating from him.

“Fi—“ Louis barely got the first letter out of his mouth before Harry closed the distance and pressed his lips to Louis’, leading him to discover a whole new meaning of life. Because, fuck, if this wasn’t it, he had no idea what else could it be.

One thing was for sure, Harry knew how to kiss.

The deeper and more intimate their kisses became, the firmer Louis’ grip on Harry’s wrists became. He was fully leaning his body against Harry’s and now there wasn’t any doubt at all Louis wouldn’t feel a massive boner pressing against his belly and making his own cock fill up more and more with every frantic lick and roll of their tongues.

“Fuck.” Harry grunted as he gasped for air and before Louis had time to react in any way Harry had broken loose from Louis’ grip, lowered his hands to Louis’ waist and spun them around before lifting him into the air to have him perched on the kitchen worktop with Harry between the V of his legs.

He was kissing Louis with more fervour and Louis couldn’t hold back the little moans escaping his mouth anymore. Harry’s hands were everywhere before coming up to cup his face slightly and tilting Louis’ head to the side as he started to trail his kisses lower until he found the pulse point and sucked at it carefully.

“Oh, fuck.” Louis moaned, leaning the back of his head against the cupboard door and giving Harry more room to do whatever it was he was doing. His hands slipped into Harry’s soft curls gripping his fingers tightly around them guiding Harry lower.

“Can I take this off?” Harry asked, sliding his flat palms against Louis’ torso under his t-shirt, eliciting a shiver and the rise of gooseflesh. As Louis nodded emphatically, Harry pulled it off and dropped it precariously onto the floor.

Soon Harry’s lips were back on Louis’ kissing him in a softer, more yearning way than earlier. His lips moved slowly, and his fingers were burning his newly exposed skin with every touch they made. At a ridiculously slow pace, he popped the button of Louis’ jeans open and pulled the zip down giving his cock some much needed room. His thumbs made small circles on the line where his jeans’ waistband started, fingers almost slipping underneath but at the last moment, he pulled them back.

“If you don’t do it, I will.” Louis grunted between the kisses guiding Harry’s hands lower and lifted his bum up so Harry could grab his jeans and pull them down alongside his boxers.

Harry licked and bit his lips a couple of times and Louis could see the same lust in his eyes that must be visible in his own. He leaned to press his mouth against Louis’ one more time before he sloppily kissed his way down to meet Louis hard awaiting cock. Harry gave the tip a tentative kiss and then carefully took him into his mouth. He hollowed his cheeks and sucked it gently causing Louis to inhale loudly. Maybe it was a signal to Harry, or maybe he had done it regardless but before Louis even had time to exhale again Harry had already taken him fully into his mouth, his nose grazing the thatch of hair on his groin and it felt so fucking good.

Maybe even too good, if Louis was being honest. Was it Harry’s expertise or the fact no one had given him head for a very long time but only after a few bobs Louis felt the too-familiar pooling in his lower belly, telling him that unless Harry gave him a second or two to collect himself, it would all be over very, very soon. He tugged Harry’s hair trying to make him pause only to notice it just made Harry even more eager. Hmm, he’ll have to remember that if he ever gets this opportunity again.

“I’m close—“ the suction intensified and Louis glanced at how hollow his cheeks had become and how stretched his lips had become around the base of his cock, and that was all Louis was able to say before coming intensely into Harry’s mouth who was now beginning to violently jack himself off. It was relieving to see Louis wasn’t the only one who’s stamina was sitting at a zero out of ten. Harry lapped the remaining drops of come off Louis’ cock and licked his lips before standing up, and after a few short tugs, Harry came with a grunt and shot his load on their naked bellies as he buried his face in Louis’ neck, subconsciously savouring his pheromones.

They stayed like that coming down together, Louis softly scratching Harry’s scalp. Louis was given a head start after all and he patiently waited until Harry was able to move again. They were not in a rush and Louis really, really enjoyed taking care of this beautiful soul who almost in that same moment, straightened himself up whilst looking slightly embarrassed as he peered at Louis sheepishly from under his fringe.

“Mmm,” Harry mumbled and quickly pecked a kiss on Louis’ lips.

“I don’t know if you’ll believe me, but I usually last longer.” Louis grinned, trying to cover his uncertainty. He had been like a teenager who had just been sucked for the first time and came almost untouched.

“I do,” Harry smirked. “And I don’t think I was any better. It’s been a while and you are so fucking hot.”

“So, it was my fault that your stamina was that of a sixteen-year-old?” Louis laughed and kissed away Harry’s embarrassment.

“I’m gonna show you later how long I can keep it.”

“Is that a promise?” Louis crooked his brows in question.

“Of course. Do you really think I’m gonna let you go and this was all you would get? No, babe. This was just an amuse-bouche.” Harry winked making Louis cackle aloud.

“Oh. My. God.” He managed to say between peals of laughter. “That was an awful joke.”

“But I made you laugh,” Harry said, seemingly pleased with himself. There was a distant memory from the night they had met that warned those jokes might not be just an occasional thing.

“It still doesn’t mean it was a good one.”

“Ahh, but you got it anyway.” Harry hummed, sounding pleased.

“I got it and it was horrible.” Louis pulled Harry closer to kiss him one more time before gently pushing him a bit further away. “Look at this mess.”

“If it was your come, I would lick it all away, but I think now we have to settle on kitchen paper,” Harry said, reaching for the roll and tearing a couple of pieces off it. He moistened them under the tap and wiped the mess off first from Louis’ belly and then from his own, and finalized the job by drying their skin with a dry piece of slightly rough paper.

“Thanks,” Louis said and jumped off from the top. Suddenly he felt way too naked standing there, Harry’s mossy green eyes aimed at him and all Louis wanted to do was to escape. “I need to use the bathroom if it’s ok,” Louis asked, without looking at a now worried-looking Harry and just quickly gathered his clothes from the floor and placed them in front of his groin.

“Sure, umm, yeah. There’s one right next to the stairs one floor up and it’s the first door on the right-hand side. Here, I can show you.” Harry made an effort to step towards the stairs but Louis stops him by placing his hand firmly on Harry’s arm, right over the tattoo of an anatomical heart.

“No!” Louis enforced, a tad too strongly and added with a strained smile, “Thanks, but I think I can find it me’self.'' and dashed out of the room before Harry had time to say anything else.

“Feel free to use anything you need.” Harry shouted after him and Louis felt his eyes on his arse as he rushed out of the kitchen.

Louis shot up the short flight of stairs to the bathroom Harry had directed him to and closed the door behind him. With fumbling fingers, he locked it, spun around and slid down the cool surface behind him. Only then was he able to relax again. Well, at least try to anyway. He leaned against the white door and for a moment he just concentrated on breathing in and out at an even pace. It would be too easy to get himself oxygen-deprived and begin hyperventilating, even if there was no real danger causing him to panic in the first place.

Simple. But not easy.

Luckily, Louis hadn’t had a full-blown panic attack for years now; something he was very grateful for. But still sometimes, like now, situations caused his body to experience various degrees of the fight or flight stress response, despite there not being any physical reason for them.

With every breath in and out, his mind slightly calmed down, but it didn’t make him feel any better overall. Yes, the peak point of his anxiety had faded but it had left behind feelings of shame regarding his behaviour. And he absolutely had no reason for it. The fact he had just been blown by some superstar shouldn’t be one. And after all, this wasn’t even about Harry’s status. It was just an extra bonus on top of everything. It all had just happened way too fast for him to handle it well and as a result, he had locked himself in the loo and is now staring at his blanched and pasty reflection in the mirror.

The man staring back wasn’t him anymore. He could see remnants of himself in the form of his naked body, but more so he saw that shaky, insecure teenager he had once been and he surely felt the same way right at that moment. He just had to pull himself together and go back downstairs before Harry would start to wonder what he was doing.

Louis picked up the pile of clothes on the floor where he had dropped them and dressed again. Then he turned on the tap and let the water pour out into his palms. He washed his face and the feel of the cold refreshing water on his skin actually helped him to calm down and get back into the present. Now all he had to do was to dry his face and go back to Harry.

“Fuck…” Was all he could say when he looked in the mirror again.

How was it possible he had totally forgotten he was wearing eyeliner? A routine he performed every day. Of course, the water had made it streak around his eyes and made him look like a fucking panda bear. There was no way he could face Harry looking like this.

He pumped some soap on his hands and this time using warm water, he washed his face. It helped a little bit, but something other than plain water and soap would work so much better. Louis saw a small basket on the other end of the vanity surrounding the sink and Harry’s words ‘use anything you need’ echoing in his head, he checked if there was something that would help him now.

“Perfect…” Louis said aloud when he lifted the small bottle of micellar water. He soaked the cotton pad with the liquid and wiped his eyes. Obviously, the stuff worked but Louis couldn’t keep from wondering why Harry had such items stocked in his bathroom.

Maybe he just wanted to be hospitable to all his guests and it had nothing to do with the womanizer image he had read about since he had found out who Harry actually was. Louis wasn’t proud of that, but he just couldn’t help himself.

And right now, he hated it even more as the unwanted thoughts began filling his mind.

He pushed them away and dropped the used cotton pads into the wastebasket beside the toilet. His face looked way too vulnerable again without his eyeliner, but the eye pencil was in the pocket of his backpack that was laying in Harry’s hall and out of his reach.

He nodded to his reflection once to encourage himself, turned around and unlocked the bathroom door and pulled it open.

***

Harry watched Louis disappear upstairs, his clothes hastily gathered in front of his lap while confusion plagued his own mind. Harry listened from the kitchen doorway as the bathroom door was slammed closed and then it was just him again in a big house. His first instinct was to rush after him to see if he had done something wrong, but the small voice inside him told him to back off. Even if he had, he certainly had no idea what it had been. After all, it had been Louis who had made the first move so he couldn’t have misunderstood that either.

Still puzzled, he bent down to collect his neglected pants from the floor and since he couldn’t hear any sign from Louis either, Harry decided it was probably alright if he made a quick stop to the bathroom too. He was already at the foot of the stairs when he realized he’d have to walk past the bathroom Louis was using if he wanted to use his own en-suite.

It might be embarrassing if Louis were to open the door at the exact moment Harry would be sneaking past it and making him think he was spying on him. Because the situation was somewhat mixed already, Harry didn’t want to take any risks by pushing it any further. He made a quick u-turn and headed towards the laundry room hoping he would find some clean clothes to wear. He tossed the clothes he was carrying to the dirty laundry basket and retrieved his third pair of shorts for today from the folded basket of laundry. He decided on white ones this time, along with a similar coloured vintage Kiss t-shirt that was falling apart, the fabric had become threadbare and full of holes over the years but still, Harry wasn’t able to give it up.

He quickly showered again, this time using the small corner stall that serves useful for pool guests. Once he was dried off, he slipped into the clothes he placed on the marble top next to the sink. The whole process hadn’t taken more than a few minutes, but Harry was worried that Louis would be wondering where he was.

But his worries were needless.

No one was seen or even heard anywhere near the kitchen, where Harry had practically run back to. With a low sigh, he slumped himself on one of the bar stools Louis had been sitting at earlier and leaned his elbows against the cool surface of the island. If someone had asked him what he would have expected to happen after they left together from the gym, this definitely wasn’t the scene he would have painted; him sitting alone in the kitchen after quite a mind-blowing orgasm and wondering in confusion if Louis might have already left his house without saying a word.

Shit. Fuck. Shit.

The demanding ringtone of his work phone cut through his thoughts. It was ringing somewhere nearby because the sound was clear and loud, but it took a few moments for him to locate it. It must have slid out from the pocket of his shorts while they had dropped off because Harry found it on the floor near the worktop where they had just had sex.

He wasn’t surprised to see Jeff’s face on the screen. Yeah, Harry adored him but right now he was tempted to chuck the phone, which included Jeff, into the pool and focus on the dilemma that was Louis, whose whereabouts were unknown. He had barely swiped his thumb across the screen to accept the call when Jeff’s voice already echoed through the speaker.

“Harry, hi.” He replied, not bothering to wait for Harry’s greeting and immediately continued to talk. “I’m calling to confirm the plans for tonight.”

The response: ‘What plans…?’ Had been a nano-second away from slipping through Harry’s lips but at the last possible moment, he was able to swallow it back and ended up mumbling sounds even he couldn’t understand.

”Pardon?”

“Fuck…” he muttered more to himself but of course Jeff had caught that too.

“You forgot the dinner?” Jeff asked, rather icily.

“Well, kinda…” Harry mumbled, sounding embarrassed. He had always been so well organized especially with his work-related endeavours and he knew exactly where and when he should be somewhere. And now he had forgotten the biggest appointment he’s ever made with his label. How had he been able to erase that from his mind?

Louis, Harry quickly realized.

Louis had occupied the majority of Harry’s mind over the past few hours and nothing else had been relevant, fuck, he forgot the rest of the damn world existed. Harry absently listened while Jeffrey preached on and managed to write down the time Jeff said he was sending the car to pick him up on a sticky note, and stuck it on the fridge door.

Not that he was ever going to forget that now, but just in case.

When the call with Jeff finally ended, Harry muted his phone before tossing it aside, he realized he was still at square one with his original issue: Louis. There was no sound coming from upstairs and Harry had to use all of his willpower not to go and knock on the bathroom door to ask if everything was alright. Because that was the normal human thing to do. But something in his mind kept saying to stay away and wait for him to come down.

But patience had never been a virtue of Harry’s, particularly in situations like this, and he just had to do something. He took his other phone from the table and went directly to recent calls to find the number he was looking for. It felt a bit embarrassing to call Niall about this, but this was what friends were for.

Emergencies.

And this, for sure was one. Right?

As soon as the phone started to connect, Harry regretted his haste. But backing out now seemed impossible as it didn’t take more than half a second for Niall to answer.

”Harry!” He screamed in his Niall-y way and even if it was sometimes just a loud, albeit annoying habit his best friend had, it was also something familiar and made Harry immediately relax a degree or two. Despite knowing the exact reason, he was still experiencing stress levels higher than he’d felt in a long time.

”Hey.” Harry drawled slowly and simultaneously thinking about what he was going to say next. Again, another thing that was so unlike him. What the hell was happening to him and how had he managed to create such chaos in such a short amount of time in his usually structured and organized life?

Louis. Louis happened.

”How are you?” Harry asked because that was something he was expected to say, and his stupid mind was still refusing to invent anything better.

Slackly he listened to Niall’s reply that he was on his way to some golf tournament. Whereabouts; that remained a mystery. Harry was sure he heard a sound coming from upstairs as Niall asked him a question.

”What…?” Harry whispered into the phone, immediately catching Niall’s attention.

“What’s going on?”

“Nothing.” Harry sighed after a small pause he used for listening for approaching steps, but the house has fallen into its previous deafening silence.

“C’mon, H. You know how this goes. You can spill now, or I keep pestering you for a couple more minutes and you tell me. It’s your choice.”

Harry knew Niall was right and that was the reason why he had called him in the first place, but he still didn’t know how to actually begin.

”So…” Harry started, “Do you remember that guy I met at the party trolley the other day?”

”The one whose pictures you were jerking off to afterwards?” Niall laughed.

”I wasn’t jerking off.” Harry tried to object weakly because he really didn’t have a winning case here since he literally just jacked off while looking at Louis. But Louis had been so hot with his hooded eyes boring into his soul as he sucked him dry. What else could he have done?

”Whatever you say…” Niall said, probably rolling his eyes to strengthen his words. ”What about him?”

”I met him again!” Harry yell-whispered because even in an empty kitchen, he was worried Louis would somehow hear his desperate phone call.

”Where?”

”At the gym. This morning.” Harry replied quietly while crossing the room to the sliding panelled door leading to the garden. He slid it partially open and seated himself at the threshold. He could have gone fully outside but then again, if Louis would call out for him upstairs, he wouldn’t hear it.

”That’s great. Are you going to meet again?”

”Ummm—” Harry mumbled sitting on the floor and leaning his back against the wall. ”He’s actually here now…”

”Why the hell are you talking to me on the phone if he’s there? We can talk later.” Niall shouted.

”But— But he is in the bathroom. He’s been there almost fifteen minutes now.” Harry said, mindlessly stress-rubbing the back of his neck.

”Tummy problems. They aren’t fun.” Niall sympathized.

”I don’t think that’s the case here...” Harry bit his lip. He took a deep breath and poured all that had happened out to Niall.

”So, let me get this straight,” Niall said when Harry had finished his story ”You’re telling me you met this Louis guy less than an hour ago and you’ve already fucked him?”

”More like two hours and I didn’t fuck him.” Harry corrected him.

”You just said you had sex with him and then he locked himself into the bathroom.”

”Other kind of sex, Niall.” Harry hissed. ”No fucking.”

”So you were jerking off! I knew it!” The sound of Niall cackling wasn’t doing anything to help calm him down.

”I wasn’t even going to tell you anything.” He huffed out.

”Yeah, yeah..” Niall replied with a pondering tone and then paused for a moment. ”Are you sure you did everything right? The sex I mean.”

What—?” Harry didn’t hear that correctly, did he?

”Well it sounds like you already managed to drive him away.”

”I don’t mean to sound rude Niall but what the hell are you talking about?” Harry was about to get fully pissed off and Niall, for sure, wasn’t helping him at all.

”Dude, did you like, uh, bite him or something?”

”God, NO!” Harry shook his head furiously. ”Niall, stop. Now. Please.” Harry begged.

”Ok. Then what do you think happened?”

”I don’t know!” Harry cried out, equally as baffled. “He made the first move. Everything seemed to be good before and after, then suddenly something happened, he freaked out, and ran away.”

”Maybe he just got scared of the situation? It all happened quite fast, H. It can be a bit overwhelming sometimes. Especially if it’s something you don’t usually do.” Niall countered.

Harry had to admit, Niall had a point this time. Because Harry himself was a mess with the feelings going inside him, so could he really be to blame if someone else had a similar reaction. But before Harry had time to respond, he heard footsteps descending the stairs and this time he was positive they were not just a figment of his imagination. It definitely was someone of flesh and blood approaching the kitchen. Harry quickly jumped up from the floor.

”He’s coming, I gotta go!” Was all he had time to exclaim on the phone before Louis stepped in looking even more beautiful than before.

Harry had no idea what he should do next, but he had to try. He had nothing to lose.

Except for Louis.

Shit.

Knowing he had never been good with unexpected situations, there was a major chance this would turn into a disaster in any minute now.

***

Louis heard Harry’s low voice long before he even was near the kitchen. It was more like unclear muttering than actual words but the pauses between the speech made it quite obvious he was on the phone with someone.

”He’s coming. I gotta go!” Was said hastily when Louis was about to step into the kitchen and was enough to make him understand he had been right and to top it off, been the topic of the conversation, or at least part of it. The uneasy feeling, he had just managed to shake away tried to crawl back, but this time Louis was more determined and shut his mind from all the speculation his unintentional eavesdropping had stirred up.

He formed a smile on his face, hoping it wouldn’t look too forced and stepped into the kitchen.

”Hi.” Louis said timidly and watched as Harry swiped some invisible dust away from his shorts near the doorway to the garden, a guilty smile plastered on his face.

”Sorry it took so long but my little sisters just called and it took longer than expected to get through the call.” Louis explained uneasy. Hearing Harry on the phone had given him an idea for a little white lie. He wasn't a fan of telling porkies but this time it just felt easier.

”Oh.” Harry said in a confused tone. ”Uuh— It’s all right, I was just on the phone with Niall too.”

”My best friend.” Harry added when Louis gave him an inquisitive look. ”Hope everything is good back home.”

”Yeah, yeah. All good. They just reminded me that I have to get them souvenirs.” This wasn’t so far from the truth anyway. Louis already had gotten a few demanding messages from the twins and the list of the make-up they wanted, got longer every single time. Why on Earth were they asking him to buy them when there was Lottie who actually knew something about that stuff?

It was just then when it hit him. His fucking phone was still at the repair shop and now he had just explained to Harry, in great detail, that he had been talking to his sisters from the bathroom! No wonder he had looked baffled, even though he didn’t confront Louis on the contradiction. However, that still didn’t change the fact Louis felt like an utter idiot.

”You have sisters then?” Harry asked while he started to do something in the cooking area again. Louis had wandered near the opened garden doors, hoping the fresh air coming outside would help him to gather his thoughts together. Pretending his lie never happened.

”Yeah,” Louis turned to look at Harry and grinned ”I have five.”

”And one brother.” Louis added to a surprised-looking Harry.

”Really?” Harry’s voice was still astonished, and his tone didn’t give up anything until he continued. ”That’s amazing!”

”Most of the time, yes, but being in the same house with all of them wasn’t always easy.”

”I can only imagine that. I only have one and she caused enough trouble.” Harry grinned. “I’ve always wanted to have a big family.”

”I love kids.” Harry added dreamily before Louis had time to clarify if he was talking about his childhood family or perhaps his future one. So, the latter it was, Louis smiled inwardly. At least, they would have one thing in common then.

”Tell me about your siblings.” Harry asked as he tied an apron around his narrow hips. Just then Louis noticed he was wearing a different outfit again, so Louis guessed he had taken a brief shower too.

”The youngest ones are twins; Doris and Ernie. They are now nine.” Louis began to explain. Harry smiled at him supportively and then turned his gaze towards the chopping board again. Maybe Harry had sensed how tense Louis still was and had picked up a neutral topic to talk about.

And Louis must admit Harry was right, at least partly.

The topic of the family had never been a neutral topic for Louis in the past, but talking about his siblings today seemed to strike a strange sense of calm throughout his body and he didn’t know quite what to make of that. He’d remain that way as long as the conversation stays on just his siblings. There are branches of his family tree he’s not sure he’s ready to discuss.

”Then there’s Phoebe and Daisy who just turned 17.”

”Another set of twins?” The chopping paused for a moment when Harry twisted his head towards Louis to see if he was serious.

”Yeah, it runs in the family.”

”Apparently.” Harry laughed. ”Must be quite hard for your mum.”

”Must have been. She never complained though.” Louis smiled fondly. If Harry heard the past tense, he decided to say nothing, and Louis was grateful for that.

”The next one is Fizzy, or Felicite like she wants to be called nowadays. But within the family, she will always be our Fizzy.” Louis said softly. They only had a one-year age difference and maybe for that reason, she had always been the closest of the siblings to Louis. ”She’s a teacher, she trained specifically to work with kids who have special needs.”

”That’s admirable work they do.”

”She’s awesome with kids. I think since she was ten, she has always known she wanted to be a teacher, there was never another option for her.”

”When you know, you know.” Harry agreed.

”Yeah.” Louis sighed lazily walking across the room and sat on the same barstool he used earlier. ”Did you?”

”Know that I wanted to be a musician?” Harry checked and Louis confirmed the question with a slight nod.

”I guess I dreamed about it years before I dared to admit it to myself and really go for it. I’m so lucky with how it eventually worked out.”

”Just luck isn’t enough. You need a massive amount of talent and hard work to make a career as you’ve done.” Louis reminded him.

”I know, but you always need a little pinch of luck for that combination too.” Harry said and Louis couldn’t help but agree. He watched Harry walk to the fridge, taking something out and placing the package on the exact spot Louis had just a while ago been sitting on with his bare arse.

“Don’t worry, I already disinfected it so you don’t have to worry about the butt germs you might have left behind.” Harry winked a mischievous smirk on his lips.

“Shit, Harry. You’re terrible!” Louis burst into a laugh.

“Made you laugh again.” He reminded. “But really, are you alright?” Harry asked now with a serious look on his face.

“Of course. Why wouldn’t I be?”

“You just left so quickly earlier, and I thought I did something to hurt you.”

”Ummm—” Louis didn’t know what to say. Somehow, he had hoped they wouldn’t have to come back to that topic again but now he had Harry looking at him with worry in his big beautiful eyes and waiting for an answer. Louis knew he had to say something.

”I don’t do one night stands.” Louis blurted. When Harry just stood there quietly, a blank expression on his face Louis hurried to explain more.

”I know it’s not even a night or anything. It’s not even night.” What the fuck was he even talking about. ”I mean—”

“I think the situation just took over me.” He sighed and forced himself to shut up.

”You think it’s normal for me?” Harry said in a strained voice. As soon as Louis raised his gaze to meet Harry’s, he quickly turned his whole body away and walked to the package sitting on the kitchen top. But Louis was sure the glimpse he had seen in eyes had been something near…affliction?

”No, but…”

”Well, everyone else seems to. That I fuck everyone I’ve ever been seen with. So, I understand if you do too.” Harry said leaning against the worktop, shoulders hunched, and all Louis wanted to do at that moment was embrace and hold him close.

Take the pain away.

”But I don’t.” Harry whispered, twisting himself towards Louis again and staring him straight into his eyes.

Why me then, was the question waiting on the tip of Louis’ tongue. He just wasn’t ready to hear the answer so the question itself also remained unasked. What he was afraid of, Louis couldn’t tell.

Eventually, it was Harry who unlocked his gaze first. Louis’ heart was beating frantically without any good reason.

Except, Louis knew something had just happened and it felt too important to ignore. He just couldn’t get a good grip on what it was. But one look at Harry made it pretty clear, he seemed to be as overwhelmed as Louis. His expression didn’t give him away, it was his shaking hands when he pulled out a heavy-looking griddle pan and placed it on the stove.

”Umm— If you like, you could set the table? Food is almost ready.” Harry asked while putting the burner on. ”You don’t have to if you don’t want to, I can do it instead.” He hastily added before Louis had time to respond in any way.

”I’m totally capable of doing it, Harry.” Louis laughed and walked closer to the drawers that looked like they could hold cutlery inside them. ”I’m happy to do it. Just tell me where I can find what we need.”

In a heartbeat, Harry was next to him and opened one of the drawers that Louis had been guessing was the one. There weren’t more than three inches separating their bodies. Louis’ skin was itching with the need for Harry’s touch. Chills scampered down his spine where Harry’s hot breath met the sensitive skin of his neck. All Louis had to do was to turn around and he would be in Harry’s arms again. Louis felt a butterfly-light touch on his hip and then it was gone.

And so was Harry.

”Hope you like tuna? I didn’t think to ask you before.” Harry asked, placing something in the pan causing it to sizzle loudly.

”Sure.” Louis replied absentmindedly, clutching the cutlery in his hand. For a moment Louis thought he had just imagined Harry’s touch but the spot above his hip bone where his fingers had gently lingered over was still tingling so it must have been real.

Or Louis was really starting to lose his mind.

Before he could do anything stupid, like start to kiss Harry senseless, Louis grabbed the pair of drinking glasses they had used earlier from the kitchen island and flew out of the room into another big white room with a large glass dining table placed strategically in the centre.

When he realized he was alone, he carefully placed the glasses he was holding in his hands onto the table and sat down and leaned against the back of a chair in an effort to pause and clear his mind. But his mind was way too restless for now. He pushed himself up and rushed to his backpack still sitting on the floor near the front door. First, he dug out his eyeliner and quickly lined his eyes feeling instantly better. From the zipped pocket he grabbed a wrinkled cigarette carton and checked if his lighter was in his jeans pocket as it usually was. Only when he was at the far end of the terrace with his ciggie lit was he actually able to relax enough to stop and think. Or at least try to.

What the hell was happening to him? How was Harry able to affect him this much every time he came closer than three feet? Even now, he was already sporting an inconvenient semi.

Because of one single graze from Harry’s fingers.

This was so not him. He usually needed to go on at least double the number of dates than the usual third date rule to even consider getting or giving a blow job, nevermind sleeping with them. And now he was thinking of dozens of different ways he wanted to be taken by Harry. Or how he could make Harry moan just by using his fingers…

Louis pushed himself up angrily. He needed to stop right now. Harry might have confessed in the kitchen that he wasn’t alone with his desire for another round, but he still didn’t know what he should do. Go for it and enjoy it as long as it lasts?

Louis knew this wouldn’t be anything more than a week-long holiday shag at its peak. And if he was a realist, this would end the moment he got his phone back. Would he want a rematch from earlier? Louis had to admit it was really tempting. But would he really do it?

No.

The answer came into his mind loud and clear. As soon as he would get his phone back, he would be out of the house. It would be for the best. He even didn’t know anymore why he had even agreed to this entire plan in the first place.

Still rather tense, Louis killed the fag on the ground but couldn’t see any ashtray on the tables. He ran up to the already familiar bathroom and flushed the butt down the toilet. He washed his hands with soap and dried them carefully before returning to the dining room.

The noise from the kitchen startled him from his thoughts as he entered the room and Louis quickly placed the cutlery on the table. On the side table, he saw a silver rack holding a bundle of serviettes and folded a couple of them under the cutlery so they wouldn’t be laying directly on the glass table. He could set the table, but it definitely wasn’t something he could do artfully, Louis thought when he looked down at the table.

Well, this wasn’t a formal occasion anyway so this would be fine for now.

But at the last moment, before Harry stepped in carrying two plates, Louis grabbed the big vase sitting in the middle of the dining table full of pastel pink peonies and moved it closer to the end where they would be eating.

”What do you want to drink?” Harry asked, placing the plates on the table. ”Beer, wine, soda…?”

”Water is just fine.” Louis said, trying to be modest.

”You sure?” Harry confirmed before disappearing and soon arrived holding a glass jug filled with water and some lime slices in his hands. Like a good host, he filled Louis’ glass before sitting down.

”Bon appetit!” Harry wished and avidly stabbed his fork into his salad. But Louis just stared at his plate.

The salad looked good. Well, as good as a salad can look. Bright green vegetables, boiled eggs with bright yellow yolks that looked like tiny suns on the plate and the red cherry tomatoes completing the colours in the bowl. They all looked fine. The problem was the plum-coloured lump on top of them.

The fucking tuna.

How he hadn’t realized Harry had been talking about fresh tuna? Louis had seen it on the worktop but still his brain had associated Harry’s question if Louis liked tuna to be that of the canned variety. Which he liked quite a lot. This instead…

Well, not so much.

He just didn’t know how to say it to Harry, so he just kept circling it while eating. Eggs he liked anyway, and tomatoes were sweet and delicious, even the green beans were edible; thanks to the tasty lemon dressing Harry had made. But the piece of fish, no matter how skilfully it seemed to be prepared, Louis hadn’t been able to bring himself to taste yet. He knew he didn’t have much time left before Harry would notice something was wrong and decided to be brave. He cut the tiniest cube possible from the tuna avoiding the red center of it. Slowly he started to move the fork towards his mouth, and he got it almost there but then in a last second, he dropped it back on the plate taking a gulp of water from his glass instead.

“You don’t have to eat it if you don’t like it. I can get you something else.” Harry said.

“No, I’m good. The fish is good.” Louis lied smoothly.

“You haven’t even tasted it.” Harry reprimanded, nodding towards his plate, with a small amused smile on his face.

“It’s raw,” Louis whispered, finally admitted the problem.

“Fresh ahi tuna has to be cooked to medium rare, at most. Otherwise, it will be very dry, and you could just eat canned tuna instead.” Harry advised him.

“Would it be wrong to say I might actually prefer the canned one?” Louis winced apologetically.

“Of course, not. I just thought it was okay because you said so.”

“I didn’t realize you were talking about fresh tuna. I’m sorry.” Louis knew he was really picky with his food, but now he felt extra embarrassed while trying to explain himself to Harry.

“No, don’t be.” Harry tried to convince him.

“I hate to be such a picky eater. My sister Lottie had tried for years to get me to eat sushi, but she still hasn’t been successful.”

“Lottie Tomlinson really is your sister?!?” Harry cried out.

“How do you know my surname is Tomlinson?” Louis said slowly. “I don’t remember ever mentioning it to you…”

“Umm—” Vigorously blushing Harry mumbled biting a frayed cuticle from his right thumb.

“I don’t think ‘Ummm’ is a valid answer here, do you?” Louis pointed at Harry with his fork where the bite of tuna was still stuck onto.

“Maybe not…”

“Well…?” Louis asked and without thinking at all, he popped the fork into his mouth.

“Eww.” When he realised he just ate the tuna he had been trying to avoid for the last ten minutes. Actually, it didn’t taste as bad as he thought it would. It barely tasted of anything other than the seasoning but the texture of it was a bit too weird and it tasted, well, like raw fish… Maybe he could finish it this time but if Louis had a choice, it would stay off his plate in the future.

“You tasted it!” Harry sounded delighted as Louis placed his empty fork back on the plate to get his glass and drink some water after his tuna struggle.

“Don’t you even try!” Louis warned.

“Try what…?” Harry asked, looking way too innocent not to understand what Louis was implying.

“My surname. How did you know it’s Tomlinson?” Louis repeated, keeping his expression steady while inside he was feeling mainly curious. This, indeed, had been a very interesting slip from Harry.

“Umm…” Harry started again rubbing his nose and avoiding eye contact with Louis at first. Then he halted for a moment and raised his gaze towards Louis making a vague confession “I might have bumped into your name on Tumblr. And on Twitter.”

“Maybe on Instagram, too,” Harry added, sheepishly.

“But not on Facebook?” Louis cocked his brow and tried to fight against the laughter bubbling from within.

“I don’t have Facebook anymore.” Harry bit his lip.

“Why didn’t you say anything before?” Louis started to laugh and immediately Harry’s face turned into a relieved smile.

“Because I still wasn’t sure if it was your name. It was mainly fan speculation after all. Even if the Louis part of the name matched.” Harry explained and then continued with an accusing tone “And you didn’t have your face visible in your profile pictures and I couldn’t be sure if it really was the same person I’d met earlier.”

“Are you saying it’s my fault you were off your face that night, or that your detective skills suck?” Louis deadpanned.

“No, sorry. Sorry. Of course, it’s not your fault. I just—”

“Harry, eat your salad. I was just kidding.” Louis laughed.

“You’re not mad at me being nosy?”

“I don’t think I can afford to accuse someone of doing something I did too.”

“You aren’t mad at me?” Harry double checked one more time.

“No, Harry. Really.” Louis assured him. “If anyone should be mad, it’s you. I practically stalked you to the gym. Not to even mention all the research I did on the internet.”

“Should we call it even then?” Harry grinned.

“Fine by me.” Louis smiled at him widely. “But I’m still not sure if I will forgive you for tricking me into eating that piece of tuna.”

Harry’s smile faded and Louis hated himself for doing that. He was only joking but Harry transformed into a good-host mood immediately.

“Can I get you something else?” Harry asked with worry in his eyes and was just about to go to the kitchen to find something to feed Louis.

“I’m good.” Louis assured him once again. “And if you want to know, it really wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. But don’t tell Lottie that.” Raucous laughter burst from Harry’s mouth.

“Don’t worry, I don’t even know her. In person, I mean.”

“But I guess you’ve heard about her anyway?”

“Well, she’s quite a big name in the beauty and fashion world, isn’t she?” Harry said and Louis couldn’t help but feel like a very proud brother. “I think she has worked with Gemma too. My sister.” Harry added as an explanation.

It was an easy bridge to discuss their families. Harry told Louis about Holmes Chapel, where he had grown up and he still regularly visited his mum who still lived there. Louis was happy to hear Harry hadn’t forgotten his roots when he’d become famous. Family was the most important thing in the world to Louis and he would do anything for it.

Like giving up your own dreams, the little voice inside his head reminded him but Louis quickly silenced it.

After they had finished their lunch, Harry shooed him into the living room while he took care of the dishes, and it popped into his mind again. He was feeling too restless to just sit down, so he wandered around the room. And perhaps he was a bit too curious to know who Harry really was and what would be a better way to satisfy his curiosity than look around a little bit.

The art on the walls was modern and some of them slightly too quirky for Louis’ taste but somehow, they just fit the mental image Louis had drawn of Harry so far. There was an acoustic guitar laying on the oversized leather armchair as if it were waiting for the right moment to be picked up again. There were a lot of framed photos scattered around the room. Most of them were of his family members; his mother and sister were especially easy to identify as they both looked like female carbon copies of Harry, but Louis was quite sure he guessed correctly which ones were of his dad and stepdad. The rest of the photos were a mixed collection of friends and babies alongside some photos of Harry taken on different occasions.

But it was the shelf loaded with books that got Louis’ mind to wander back to his previous thoughts. Louis let his finger slowly run over the spines of books. When he closed his eyes, he could almost smell the scent of the old leather books in the library he used to love to spend time in. He could reminisce about the feeling of thin paper under his finger when he flipped from one page to another. He could hear his own voice reading some of his favourite poems to his mum when she was already in a hospital.

The familiar sting rippled through his heart, just like any other time when too-painful memories caught him by surprise. It was already quite easy to talk about her without getting too emotional but when he remembered some actual situation, the longing felt so much sharper.

Just like now.

“Do you like to read, Louis?” Harry’s husky voice whispered into his ear, startling him from his painful reveries. Louis didn’t know how long Harry had been observing him since he hadn’t heard him enter the room; he had sunken so deeply into the memories. Not that it even mattered. But now that he was here, all Louis wanted was for him to pull him into his arms and hold on tight.

”I used to.” Louis gulped trying to keep his focus on the books, but Harry’s presence made it almost impossible to think about anything else other than him. The sharpness of his cologne was something Louis usually hated but combined with Harry’s natural smell it suddenly felt irresistible.

Not to mention the kind of effect his proximity was conjuring up in him again.

Louis wasn’t even sure if Harry’s purpose was to be seductive or if he was just curious to see what Louis was doing near the bookshelf. Probably the latter but it didn’t stop his curls from tickling Louis’ cheek, from how closely he was standing. All Louis had to do was turn his head a little bit and he would be able to capture Harry’s delicious mouth with his lips.

Don’t do it, was the last decent thought Louis’ brain made and then it all went fuzzy.

He had no idea what the hell happened but two seconds later he was pressed against Harry’s body again and kissing him like he was taking his last breath. Or was Harry kissing him? Louis didn’t know, and to be honest, he couldn’t care less about the technicality of who was kissing whom. All he cared about was that it was actually happening.

Again.

The hardwood of the bookshelf was pressing harshly against his spine. But it was just the tip of the iceberg compared to what he was already feeling. Harry’s hands were all over him, singeing his skin wherever they touched and left invisible imprints he hoped would last a lifetime. Louis had his fingers sunk through Harry’s chocolate-coloured hair in a vain attempt to pull him closer and consume him whole.

“What do you want, Louis?” Harry asked, biting gently at Louis’ earlobe.

“I— I want you to fuck me.”

“Are you sure?” Harry questioned as he tilted Louis’ head up, forcing him to look straight into his eyes and for a moment Louis was sure Harry was able to read his motley emotions.

No.

“Yeah.” Louis gulped loudly.

“Yeah, ok, but you can always say no, you know that, right?”

“I want you.” Was the only thing Louis could say under Harry’s intense gaze.

“Hold on tight, spider monkey.” Harry ordered as he chuckled at the Twilight reference, then grabbed Louis behind his thighs and lifted him up.

“You’re awful” Louis admonished, secretly veiling his own smile by tucking his chin over Harry’s shoulder. Instinctively he wrapped his legs around Harry’s waist and crossed his ankles to secure his position.

He was filling quickly in his jeans as his captured cock pressed against Harry’s belly and as he started to walk, every single step abrasively rubbed him in a way that shouldn’t feel good at all, but it did anyway.

With strong arms Harry carried him upstairs as though he weighed nothing and if he was totally honest, he liked the feeling of being manhandled by Harry, and probably for the first time in his whole life he was happy that he wasn’t any bigger than he was.

With the same ease that he scooped him up, Harry put him down on the biggest bed Louis had ever seen and settled himself between Louis' legs. He propped himself up by placing his hands on the mattress next to Louis’ face and just stared at him, smiling down for so long that eventually, it was Louis who pulled him into a kiss again.

“I promised you earlier that the next time I would take it slower.” Harry whispered to Louis who had already eagerly sat up and tore off Harry’s t-shirt. He let it happen, but when Louis tried to do the same with his own shirt, he gently untangled his fingers from it and held them in his own.

“As I said earlier in the kitchen, I don’t normally do this, and when I have its been in some dark corner booth of a private club with someone else that I don’t particularly have ‘romantic feelings’ for. It’s literally just to get off.” Harry whispered into their hands.

Louis sat still for a second, trying to comprehend what Harry had just said. Most of the blood in his brain had gone south so it took him a minute to realize what he was saying.

“Sooo, this whole thing today, coming back to your house, the blowie, the lunch. You’ve never done that before?” Louis asked, with a slight incredulity to his tone.

“Nope. And not for lack of opportunity either. I just never met anyone I felt this kind of connection with.” Harry answered truthfully, pointing his finger back and forth between their bodies.

“Hmm...Maybe you just haven’t had enough doors to crash through or phones to break.” He suggested with a poorly-managed straight face.

“Oi, that’s it you menace!” Harry separated Louis’ hands by grabbing one and pushing them above his head before Louis let his head fall back down onto the pillow. Once Louis was firmly on his back, Harry swung his leg over Louis’ and straddled his lap, slowly grinding his hips back and forth into little figure eights.

“What am I gonna do with you now, huh?” Harry asked, eyes full of mirth.

Louis loved the feeling of being held down like this by Harry, despite having zero physical control in this situation, he felt safe and still believed he had the upper hand. Which he did. Without thought, he leaned up towards Harry’s face as though he was going to kiss him, but instead, licked up from Harry’s chin to the tip of his nose and giggled.

“Oh it's gonna be like that is it?” Harry ducked his chin down and his lips landed below Louis’ left ear and he bit and sucked his way down his neck, then down his sternum, before working his way over to swirl his tongue around each nipple and sucked skillfully until each one was puffy and red, flicking each nub at the end while making filthy eye contact.

Once satisfied, he continued south and stopped right below Louis’ belly button. He inhaled loudly through his mouth and pressed his lips to Louis' tummy and proceeded to blow raspberries into it with all of his might. All the while Louis had lost his mind, laughing and trying to squirm away from Harry. Which was almost impossible to do with his hands still pinned to the pillow on either side of his head and a bloody great big lump of Harry on top of him.

“This. Is. What. You. Get. When. You. Are. A. Bad. Boy. Louis. Tomlinson.” Harry spoke in a staccato rhythm as he peppered different spots on Louis’ belly between words with kisses.

“Okay OKAY! I surrender, I’ll be good.” Louis said seductively and widened his eyes in an effort to prove his innocence.

“Hmm…. We’ll see about that.” Harry said as he released Louis' hands and began to remove his jeans and his pants. He removed his own shorts and pants as well, in solidarity, of course.

Once he and Louis were fully naked, he looked down at Louis from the end of the bed in complete adoration. He grasped each ankle and proceeded to rub circles into the sides of his shins with his thumbs.

“You’re so beautiful Louis. I’ve never told anyone that, never wanted to. But seeing you here, spread out on my bed, you look too good to wreak. I want to watch you come apart carefully, inch by inch, piece by piece.” Harry bent down and placed his lips on the inside of Louis' left knee and meticulously kissed and licked his way up Louis’ inner thigh until he was met with his hard cock, that leaked against his hip bone.

Just as he was about to take the tip into his mouth Louis bellowed out “No!”

A stunned Harry stopped what he was doing and looked up at Louis with panic in his eyes, “Shit, Louis, I’m so sorry, have you changed your mind? It’s okay Lou, it's okay if you have.” Harry reassured wholeheartedly.

“No, Harry, no, it’s not that. In the kitchen earlier, on the worktop. Fuck, you were incredible. You sucked my brains out through my dick. I feel like I’m going to explode if I don’t get to return the favour.” Louis admitted.

Louis observed what looked like relief wash over Harry’s face, and he seemed to settle down and pick up where they left off. “Fuck. Yeah, of course. Umm...” Harry proceeded to mumble as he started to turn around to lay on his back.

“Wait, no. Don’t lie down. I want to try something. Umm, something I’ve never done before. If you’re up for it?” Louis timidly asked.

“Yeah, anything Lou.”

“Climb up here onto my chest, yeah? I want you to fuck my mouth”. Louis suggested as he patted his chest for Harry to follow.

Harry spluttered out what sounded like a cough or a choking sound. Louis thought to himself, if all goes well I will be the one making those sounds due to actually choking on Harry’s cock.

Harry carefully crawled up the bed and stopped once his knees were in line with Louis’ armpits and then sat down apprehensively on Louis’ chest. “Are you sure? How will I know you’re ok, that you can breathe?”

“That’s the fun part Harry, you won’t.” Louis lasciviously replied. Earning a scolding look from Harry.

“Lou, I’m serious. Look, just tap my hip hard, like this, if you need me to stop OK?” Harry demonstrated how and where he wanted Louis to notify him to stop.

Louis appreciated the concern Harry was showing for his well being. He agreed to the gesture but added his own rules. “If I grab your arse, that doesn’t count OK?” Louis bargained.

“Ok. Alright baby, open up.” Harry ordered as he rubbed the leaking tip of his cock over Louis’ lips, leaving behind a glossy sheen. “Fuck you look so good like this, it looks like lip gloss. Goes well with your pretty-lined eyes.” Harry croaked out, eyelids fully hooded.

Louis licked his lips and rolled his eyes back into his head. The taste of Harry was almost enough to make him shoot a load onto Harry’s lower back as he towered over him, cock shoved right in his face.

Louis opened his mouth as Harry slowly fed his cock into it, thrusting ever so gently. He watched the expressions on Louis’ face as they went from apprehensive to full on orgasmic. Louis hummed and moaned as every inch of his massive cock slipped further into his mouth and hit the back of his throat. Louis sputtered and choked for a second and Harry started to pull out but Louis grabbed onto the back of his arse and shoved him more into his mouth. He squeezed and rubbed his arse cheeks with every thrust Harry made in his mouth. The patch of hair at the base of Harry's dick tickled his nose and he inhaled deeply in an effort to file it away in his senses for a later date and hoped he could recall it when Harry was no longer around.

He felt an ache in his stomach at that thought but redirected his feelings to the present and hollowed his cheeks and sucked hard as if that were enough to erase the anguish burgeoning at his core.

Harry looked down at him and from the look on his face, he was just as far gone as Louis was. Louis decided it was time to move to the next level of whatever this was and inched his right middle finger from where it sat on Harry’s left arse cheek and hovered it over Harry’s hole. Without another thought, he began to rub it over his hole, making Harry’s hips stutter while he gasped at the sudden intrusion. Before Louis could pull his finger away Harry grunted out “yeah, yeah, do that again”.

Louis knew when to follow orders and placed the pad of his finger over his hole again and circled it roughly. Harry continued to moan and speak in tongues so Louis took it one step further and began pushing the tip inside, just past the nail and swirled it around gently yet expertly. Harry stopped thrusting, looked directly into his eyes and came forcefully down Louis’ throat. Louis could barely breathe but didn’t feel like he needed to tap Harry’s hip quite yet, so he let him finish coming, it was too good to be true, seeing Harry like this. Vulnerable and fucked out. Harry pulled out quickly, as though he just remembered that Louis couldn’t breathe. He let Louis take a couple of deep breaths before surging down and capturing his lips with his own and licking fiercely into his mouth.

***

“Holy shit. What the hell was that?” Harry asked his mind (and cock) completely blown.

“It’s called sex Harold. You should try it sometime.” Louis smirked as he laid there, slowly stroking his own cock.

“Hmm..well it just so happens I’ve got something I’d like to try now”. Harry retorted, as he batted Lous hand off his dick and rolled him over onto his stomach. He slapped Louis ass and marvelled at how long each cheek jiggled for. He began to squeeze and knead each cheek in his hands and every few seconds Louis’ pink hole would be on display. Harry had never eaten arse before, but he was feeling brave and hungry for it. “Hands and knees.” He ordered, grasping around Louis’ hips and hauling him up.

This was a side to Louis that he hadn’t seen yet. Pliant. Obedient. Louis appeared to be comfortable as he rested his head onto his folded arms beneath him. Harry’s hands were still holding onto his hips when he felt Louis drop his abdomen and tilt his pelvis up in a way that flaunted his arse.

They both moaned at the same time, it was hard to tell who was enjoying themselves more.

Harry dropped his head down so his face was within inches of Louis hole, and softly inhaled, filing the scent away in the recesses of his mind, trying not to think of a time when Louis wouldn’t be there. He quickly shook that thought from his mind by rubbing the pad of his thumb against Louis’ opening, testing its resilience. He removed his thumb, shoved it in his own mouth till it was dripping wet and brought it back and rubbed it with fervour.

Louis moaned, and rocked his arse back and forth, still on his hands and knees. Harry had to chase his movements, put one hand on his hip and hook his thumb on his rim to maintain constant contact. “Stay still, baby.” He requested. He tugged on his rim in a downward motion and then leaned in to lick around his thumb, adding the other thumb with it once Louis had gone motionless.

“Ahhh fuck, Harry.” Louis whined as he wiggled his bum against Harry’s tongue.

“Shh, love. I’ve got you”. Harry removed his thumbs then began licking at it like he hadn’t eaten in days. He had no idea what he was doing, but he just did what felt right and used Louis’ mewling as an encouragement to keep it up or change what he was doing. He licked, he sucked, he nibbled, and he slapped his ass when the feeling of it all got to be too much, especially when Louis reached behind him to grab a handful of Harry’s hair and began pulling on it, slamming Harry’s mouth and nose further into his arse. That action alone sent Harry reeling and almost ready to come on the spot. The combination of hairplay and breathplay was something Harry didn’t know he needed until now. God did he need it.

He pulled himself together again and reached around to tug on Louis’ cock but after the second pull, Louis spoke up and pleaded “Harry, love, please, don’t wanna come like this. Want you to fuck me. Please.”

Harry dropped his hand from Louis’ cock and pushed himself back up to a seated position, wiping the excess saliva from his mouth with the back of his hand. “Yeah? You sure?” He questioned, Louis was blissed out at the moment and Harry wasn’t sure he had all of his faculties in order.

Louis turned around and sat up, so he and Harry were eye to eye. He brought his hand up and placed it on Harry’s cheek. “I’ve never been more sure of anything Harry. I want this. Whatever this is. I want it.”

Harry leaned into Louis’ hand and smiled sheepishly before getting up off the bed to pull out a metal box with a lock on it from under the bed.

Louis raised his eyebrow at that and Harry laughed, before admitting dryly, “I am a private person Louis, I don’t want anyone snooping through my drawers and discovering I have a dildo collection and several bottles of lube made specifically for anal play.”

Lous sat up slightly and leaned back onto his elbow “Fair enough. Now, why don’t you take out that lube made specifically for anal play and get to work?”

Harry shook his head and laughed as he took out what he needed for now; a condom and a bottle of lube. Maybe the other items could come out another time before Louis leaves for the UK. Shit. He doesn’t want to think about that. He feels that ache again in his stomach. Moving on.

“Okay, uhh, now what happens? Do you want to prep yourself? Do you want me to? How do you want me to do this? On your back? Straddling me? What hurts the least?” Harry asked, leaving the many choices up to Louis.

“Slow down Harry.” Louis urged as he took the condom and lube from Harry and placed them down on the bed beside them. He rolled Harry over onto his side.

“Why don’t we both lay down on our sides, facing each other. That way we can see each other and you can know I’m okay.” Louis said as he rolled onto his side and proceeded to raise his leg up and over Harry’s hip, giving him all the access he would need to finger him open and kiss him senseless whilst doing so.

Harry brought his hand up to Louis’ chin, raised it up and kissed him softly, taking his time to savour every second of their tender kiss. He trailed his hand down from Louis’ chin along the side of his arm, to his hip and slowly around to his bum. He made his way toward the centre and tentatively poked his finger around his hole and then pulled his lips away from Louis’.

He reached over him, grabbed the lube and snicked the cap open with one hand and started to tip the bottle upside down. Louis grabbed the bottle, as if he’d already anticipated the mess Harry was about to make trying to dispense the liquid onto the same fingers he held the bottle with.

He squirted some of it onto Harry’s fingers and stopped to allow Harry to rub his fingers together to spread it around. Before any could drip from his fingers onto the sheets he swiftly brought his fingers to Louis’ hole and continued his ministrations.

After circling his entrance for what felt like eons for both of them, he pushed the tip of his middle finger in and began to pump it in and out at a snail’s pace for a good two minutes.

“Oh for God's sake Harry, please before I have to get back on the plane!” There it is again, the reality of their situation.

Harry then added his index finger alongside the middle one and picked up the pace. Louis was writhing around and panting in Harry’s face. Louis' eyes were squeezed shut and his cheeks flushed as red as his lips. Those lips that Harry must have again. He started to nip at them, causing Louis to open his eyes and reciprocate, biting and sucking on Harry’s lips as Harry feverishly fucked two fingers in his arse, slipping in his ring finger when Louis bit down on his lip particularly hard, drawing a bit of blood.

“Oops, sorry.” Louis apologized, with lustful eyes and swollen lips.

“S’Fine,” Harry replies, swiping at the bit of blood on his lip with a tongue. “Too much?” He asks.

“No, fuck no. Keep going.” Louis practically begged. After a minute of swirling and rolling his fingers around to stretch out his walls, he rolled Louis over on his back with his body weight so Harry could get his pinky finger in as well. He folded all four of his fingers together, to make them as cylindrical as possible before slowly but firmly twisting his fingers in until he got up to the knuckles, curling his fingers to prod and stroke away at Louis’ prostate.

“Oh fuck.” They both say at the same time. Louis has his head thrown back and Harry has his eyes glued to the place they pumped in and out of, he can’t believe he’s getting to do this. With Louis. He can’t wrap his head around the fact that this beautiful body and soul is laying here before him, begging to be fucked by him. HIM!

He snapped out of his thoughts to the sound of Louis literally begging him to stop because he’s going to come without being properly fucked.

Harry pulled his fingers gently out of Louis and listened as he whimpered at the loss of being stuffed full of Harry’s fingers. Harry leant over to the edge of the bed and retrieved the condom. After what felt like hours to gently rip open the packet with his teeth, he put on the condom, used both hands to pour lube onto his covered cock and gave it a few tugs.

“Fuck that feels good,” he said, kneeling before Louis on the bed, rubbing his cock all over his hole.

“It’d feel better if you’d just fuck me”. Louis spat out, with an impatient tone to his voice.

Harry continued to rub his cock back and forth over Louis’ hole, and side to side for what felt like an eternity. “Shh baby, just making sure you’re wet enough.” Harry reassured him.

Only when Harry felt like Louis had been prepped enough did he push in slowly, at the same pace with which paint dries. Thus beginning a new method to torture Louis with.

“Please Harry, please.” Louis begs, bringing both of his hands up into his own hair and tugging on it in desperation to feel something.

Harry started thrusting in, one inch at a time, still making sure to check in with Louis’ facial expression before asking “This ok?” Louis responds only by wrapping his legs around his hips in an attempt to pull his arse up higher, closer, to Harry.

Harry took the hint and wrapped his hands around Louis’ hips and raised him up in the air so Louis’ head and shoulders were the only part of his body still making contact with the bed. When his grip on Louis was solid, he canted his hips forward to the hilt of Louis arse and began to deeply grind the base of his cock in circles inside of him.

Harry fucked him slow, he fucked him fast, he fucked him soft, and he fucked him hard. Just when Louis got settled on a pace or pressure and thought he could come from it, Harry changed up the cadence.

After ten minutes of this type of relentless fucking, Louis was practically screaming and his body was seconds from convulsing. His eyeliner was smudged around his eyes so it was hard to tell if it was from the sweat of their bodies or from tears of ecstasy.

With what little strength he had left in his fucked out body, Louis grabbed the headboard behind him and tried lifting himself up to fuck Harry instead. Needless to say it doesn’t work.

Harry picked up on his despair to come which prompted him to ask “Can you come untouched?”

“I… have… never… Aaah!” Louis panted between Harry’s thrusts. Before he had time to say anything else, Harry lifted his legs over his shoulders and the change in the angle made him cry out loud.

“Oh god, oh god.” Louis chanted, his hands were now gripped tightly onto the sheets, his knuckles turning white.

Harry looked at Louis’ cock and it was a deep red from all the built-up blood pressure and he looked like he desperately needed to be stroked. That’s too bad, he thought to himself. This time he’s coming untouched.

Harry changed his angle one more time as he stopped thrusting, looked down at where they were connected and just ground his hips hard into Louis’ arse before pulling back out almost all the way and slamming back in a rhythmic pace. Louis must have needed one small change in angle because he placed his hands under his knees and held his thighs up in place while Harry grabbed hold of the headboard and fucked Louis as his life depended on it.

Yes, yes, yes…fuck.

Harry watched the orgasm rock Louis’ body as he came with a shout, his eyes rolled back as waves of pleasure shook throughout his body.

Harry groaned and came at the sight of Louis’ coming completely undone from coming untouched, he crashed his body down on top of Louis and kissed him lovingly.

They laid there in silence. Appearing to still be in a blissed-out state, Louis closed his eyes. He was curled into a ball in the centre of the bed and began to breathe deeply. Harry set an alarm on his phone to take a short nap before he had to get ready for dinner with Jeff. He pulled the duvet up onto the bed from where it had been discarded on the floor and covered himself and Louis with it before wrapping himself around Louis’ body and joining him in sleep.

*

“Good night!” Harry wished cheerfully just before the car door slammed closed leaving Jeff on the other side of it.

Finally, Harry thought and immediately reproached himself being ungrateful even if that wasn’t the case here at all. Harry was so fucking thankful for many reasons, and today wasn’t any exception.

Almost the opposite, in fact.

They had just had dinner with the CEO of his label, and they had settled the publishing date for his upcoming album and almost half of his tour dates were already confirmed. The litany of mundane paperwork had been done earlier and tonight had been more about celebrating it with good food and some bubbly; and even though his album still lacked a couple of songs, Harry wasn’t too worried about it.

Yet anyway.

The champagne had been pink and crisp, so yummy that Harry might have ended up drinking many flutes and as a consequence, he was happily tipsy right now. He rested the back of his head against the headrest and made a small, satisfied hum closing his eyes for a second. It would have been easy to fall asleep as the purr of the engine was the only sound that could be heard.

But Harry was feeling way too restless to sleep when he knew the Night Black Range Rover was on its way back home where Louis, Harry hoped, would already be waiting for him. Not for the first time tonight, his mind easily went back to his bedroom where he, just a few hours prior, had the most mind-blowing sex ever. He had done things he had only dreamed of while watching some shoddy porn from his laptop, and even now, the thought of eating Louis’ pretty arse again made him both blush and also very horny. Like he already hadn’t had sex twice today, which was double the amount he had had during the past six months altogether!

Harry dug his phone out from his pocket. There were numerous messages and missed phone calls awaiting his reply but right now, Harry only cared about getting a message from one person only and to his disappointment, there was still no word from Louis.

There was no reason for him to physically and emotionally feel the way he does… Almost like Louis had abandoned him. It was a stupid thought because it hadn’t even been half an hour since Harry had texted him, they were leaving the restaurant and Louis had replied with a yellow thumbs-up emoji. Why wasn’t that enough?

Harry closed his eyes briefly and sighed. Deep inside he knew the answer; Harry already missed him. And that definitely didn’t make any sense.

Like how is it even possible?

They have known each other less than a day, just a few lousy hours actually. Technically, of course, their association had lasted a bit longer. And it wasn’t lousy in the least, but Harry really couldn’t count that, could he? Harry started to giggle aloud when he realized he had shaken his head to strengthen his own thoughts. The driver gave him a weird look through the mirror, but Harry didn’t mind him.

Instead, he tried to peer through the tinted windows to see where they were and how long it would take to get home. They had dropped Jeff off first at his house, even though it made more of a detour for Harry. But he wasn’t going to take the risk of Jeff deciding to invite himself in for a nightcap while dropping Harry off. Of course, he could have made a plausible excuse why he couldn’t do it this time, but Harry didn’t trust himself to tell a believable white lie, and Jeff bumping into Louis would have raised more concern just when the last one over the trolley pic had faded. That time Harry had been able to tell him with honest eyes that nothing more than a photo with a fan had happened, no matter what various social media platforms were buzzing about. But now that explanation had gone out the window and probably just one look at Harry would have exposed him if Jeff just asked the right questions.

Was this never going to end?

Over the years it had become second nature for him. In the interviews, lies flowed easily, as a well-practised mantra, but still, it didn’t stop the silent rebellion he had to fight every time. He had grown used to the numbness that followed every new tabloid headline whenever he was photographed with any female, no matter who they were. The usual “Is she Harry’s new girlfriend?” question had been asked even after his pics with his sister. Then Harry had wanted to throw up, it had just felt so gross. But otherwise, he had always taken the womanizer image part of his life as something that went hand in hand with his career and so far, he hadn’t had any conflicting reasons to say ‘no’ to it.

Harry didn’t know where all that anger suddenly came from. If they hadn’t right at that moment stopped behind the gate leading to his private driveway, Harry didn’t know what might have happened. He likely wouldn’t have been bold enough to tweet “I’m gay btw” but Harry knew returning to his old habits (he had promised to forget) and posting some cryptic lyrics would have been enough to cause an uproar over social media within his fan base.

Harry pulled out the remote for the gate and pushed the button to open it. They waited in silence as the heavy metal bars slid aside giving the car enough space to drive through. Just when they had pulled in front of the house, Harry saw a flash from another car’s headlights behind them.

Immediately his breath became laboured, and his mouth felt awfully dry as he tried to gulp his fear down. Only when he recognized the car in the darkness did his hammering heartbeat start to slow down.

“It’s alright, Brian. It’s a friend of mine.” Harry said with a slightly shaky voice to the driver who has also paid attention to the intruder. He hated how wary he had become with his own safety. He was able to push his fears aside most of the time, but then something would happen again, and he ended up staying awake the next night because of some innocent incident.

“Thank you, Brian.” Harry acknowledged and slipped a tip to the driver as he opened the door for him when he stepped out of the car. Brian nodded with a polite smile and drove away leaving Harry on the steps of his front door.

“Where do I park the car?” Harry startled as Louis’ bright voice divided the air in the darkness.

“Drive it inside the garage!” Harry shouted and opened the door with the remote. He walked closer to meet Louis.

“Oi, catch!” Louis yelled and threw the car keys to an unexpecting Harry who miraculously caught the flying pair of keys into his hand.

“Thanks.” Harry said nodding towards the keys. “Was everything ok with the car?”

“It was your Tesla.” Louis reminded him. “Of fucking course, it was ok. What else could it have been?”

Harry settled with a shrug of his shoulders and a satisfied smile on his lips. It had been a tiring battle to explain to Louis why borrowing Harry’s car to meet his friends for dinner and also get his belongings from Zayn’s would be an excellent idea but finally Harry had succeeded because it was clear from the shine in Louis’ eyes that Harry had been right and that it had been the right decision.

They walked to the front door in silence and Harry typed the security code into the alarm system. As soon as they were both inside, Harry activated the alarm to the entrance again. He saw Louis watching his ritual but said nothing about it. Harry would most likely tell him later about his fears but right now he was feeling way too happy to ruin his mood and instead, he pulled a surprised Louis into his arms and kissed him.

“I’ve been thinking about this for hours now.” Harry murmured against Louis’ lips.

“Me too.” Louis muttered quietly.

“You have?” Delight warmed Harry’s chest as he gently pulled up Louis’ chin with his fingers.

“Yeah…” Louis breathed out when Harry stroked his cheek with his thumb and then finally looked up at Harry, locking their gaze.

Those eyes are stunning, Harry thought as the azure colour enraptured his mind and soul making him smile sappily at the smaller lad. Harry knew he looked embarrassingly smitten right now and his only saving grace was that Louis looked equally infatuated. But then he quickly twisted his head away and the moment was gone.

This was already the second time that Louis left Harry baffled by his behaviour in a short period of time. And he couldn’t stop thinking about what was actually going on. Harry hadn’t said anything to him about noticing his little lie about the phone call to his sisters earlier because he hadn’t wanted to embarrass, or even worse, to drive him away altogether. He had thought maybe it had been just Louis’ nerves. He had been in the same position so he couldn’t really blame him for it. But now this…

To rid himself of the confusion left behind from Louis’ sudden shift in mood, Harry led Louis to the living room whilst he went to get some drinks from the kitchen. When Harry re-entered the living room balancing a glass of red in one hand, and a beer bottle and bowl of salted peanuts in the other hand, his phone started to repeat ‘It’s Britney, bitch. It’s Britney, bitch…’ signalling an incoming call.

“Shit.” Harry hissed more himself than to the smirking Louis sitting on the sofa. “Could you…?” Harry handed over the beer bottle and peanuts to Louis and hurried to take the call.

“—‘ello” He greeted when he finally managed to dig out his phone. “Yeah… Mmmm. .. I think so… Maybe tonight then. Yeah. Good. See you there. Bye.” Harry ended the phone call and switched it to silent mode before turning to Louis again.

“Harry wants me to pierce my ear.” He announced nonchalantly, as he took a sip from the red.

“Are you talking about yourself in the third person, now?” Louis tilted his head, an amused smile on his lips.

“No, no. That was my stylist Harry who called.” Harry told him, and felt it essential to add “He loves Britney Spears — hence the ring tone.”

“If you say so.” Louis smirked, twisting the cap off the beer bottle.

“So…?” Harry questioned, staring at Louis with a tilted head.

“What…?” Louis furrowed looking confused.

“Pierce my ear.”

“Pierce your ear.” Louis repeated parrotlike.

“Yeah. Louis, please.” Harry begged “You are a professional.”

“I’m a tattoo artist, not a fucking ear piercer,” Louis replied sharply.

“But they do piercings in tattoo shops, don’t they?”

“Yeah, they do. I don’t.”

“Oh.” Harry let out a disappointed sigh. Within moments his eyes brightened again as he pulled out his beloved iPhone one more time. “Maybe I can do it myself.” Harry announced more to Google than Louis, this time typing his question in the search field.

“Or maybe you can wait until tomorrow and I can take you to Zayn’s studio to get your ear pierced.” Louis sighed and took a sip from the beer bottle.

“It has to be done now.”

“What’s the sudden hurry?” Louis wondered.

“I have to fly to New York tomorrow.” Harry said and immediately he saw Louis freeze on the spot. Fuck, he hadn’t mentioned this to him before, had he?

“Awesome.” Louis said dryly. “Maybe you could have mentioned that before I went and grabbed all my stuff from Zayn’s.”

“I’ve—” Harry paused, biting his lip and gave an apologetic look at a newly offended-looking Louis. “I’ve been wanting to ask you to come with me, there…”

“What…?” Louis stared at him with wide eyes and then added “No.”

“Why not?” Harry pouted.

“Because it doesn’t make any sense. I just met you and now you’re just asking me to come to New York with you. It’s just— I don’t know…” Louis' voice faded when he took a big gulp from his bottle. “So, the piercing…?”

Harry sighed inwardly when he noticed Louis’ topic change but let it be this time and turned his interest back to the step by step piercing instructions he had found on Wikipedia. “You’ll help me then…?” Harry asked with a hopeful smile on his face.

“Give me that.” Louis snapped the phone from his hand and started to scroll through the instructions.”

“You will do it.” Harry hummed satisfied but Louis just glared at him back.

“I need to sign some liability agreement that keeps me out of jail if your ear rots and falls off, or you die of blood poisoning or something.”

“I knew you’d help. I love you.” Harry smiled and picked the smaller guy up into the air and spun them around a couple of times. It was when he put him down again that Harry realized what he had just said. No, he didn’t love Louis that way, but the words had just come out so easily without any thought or meaning behind them. Louis didn’t seem to pay any extra attention to Harry’s Freudian slip but it made him ponder how it would feel to say the same words to someone when he really meant it.

“We need hydrogen peroxide or similar to clean your ear.” Louis' voice bluntly interrupted Harry’s daydreaming. “A marker pen, ice pack and a piercing needle… Maybe we can use just a regular needle.”

“Grab some ice from the kitchen and I’ll try to find the rest of the stuff we need.” Harry said and was already halfway out of the room.

A few minutes later when Harry returned to the living room, he found Louis sitting on the sofa, Harry’s phone still in his hand. As soon as Harry managed to drop all the things he had gathered on the coffee table in front of the sofa, Louis silently handed him a small reusable plastic bag full of ice. Harry pressed the package against his right ear lobe and turned to watch a laser-focused Louis in action. In any other situation seeing someone else using his phone like it was their own, Harry would be freaking out just at the thought but right now, he almost enjoyed observing Louis, who organized the pile of objects Harry had tossed on the table like he was a surgeon and nodded as a ‘checked’ every time he could tick something off the list. It was mesmerizing for Harry to watch when Louis turned on professional mode and seemed to take his task very seriously.

“You know that we should use alcohol externally.” Louis grinned when Harry sucked his wine glass empty with one big gulp.

Harry giggled and placed the bag of ice into his left hand, shaking his right hand in the air.

“Is it getting numb?” Louis asked, pointing to Harry’s ear.

“Little by little. My fingers, too.” Harry winced.

“Good. Not the fingers but otherwise. Maybe we’ll just wait a few more minutes then.” Louis stated and Harry nodded in agreement.

“How did you have a sterile needle handy?” Louis asked, picking up a single-packed needle from the table.

“I thought about piercing my ear earlier and even bought the needle and earring but never got the motivation or the guts to do it until now.” Harry shrugged his shoulders. If he was being honest, he had actually forgotten he even had the needle. It had just popped into his mind while he had been gathering the needed items that now sat on the table ready to be used. Once again, his habit of keeping everything organized had paid off and Harry had found the needle exactly where he remembered he had put it back then.

“It’s good. It makes this a little less risky for infection.” Louis said and got up. “I just have to wash my hands and when I come back, we can get started.”

Harry stared at the big needle still in the sterile wrap laying on the table and just then it hit him that it was the needle that was going to pierce his earlobe very soon. He wasn’t scared of the pain. No, he kinda even liked the pain, but he just hated the needles. Blood tests were always a nightmare for him and now he was going to do this voluntarily. Fuck.

“Ready?” Louis asked, stepping inside the room.

Harry wanted to yell a big fat ‘no’, but instead he just nodded weakly. He just hoped he wouldn’t faint or anything. Not in front of Louis; that would be too embarrassing.

“Could you sit here and move the floor lamp a bit closer so I can see better. Ok, that’s perfect.” Louis guided him. “Is this the correct spot for the piercing?” Louis asked next and when Harry agreed, he marked it with the pen.

Harry watched as Louis began to peel the wrap off around the sterile gloves Harry had found from the emergency kit and pulled them on. The sharp odour of the alcohol reminded Harry of doctor’s appointments when Louis cleaned his ear with the wipe and when he saw him picking up the needle that seemed to have grown much bigger since Harry saw it for the first time upstairs, Harry had to close his eyes to keep from passing out.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Louis' voice echoed somewhere near. “Harry, look at me.”

Harry forced his eyes open.

“You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.” Louis said in a soft voice.

“I do, I want to.” Harry croaked. “I just hate needles.”

“With the number of tattoos you have, you’re honestly telling me you hate needles?”

“It’s not the same thing. This needle is so big and it will go right through my flesh.” Harry said disgust in his voice.

“Would it help if I tell you all the time what I'm gonna do next?”

“It might.”

“Ok, love. Just relax and close your eyes if you don’t want to watch.”

Louis started to explain the steps, but all Harry was able to hear was Love. Louis had just called him 'love’ and Harry felt a big dopey smile spread across his face, but he just couldn’t help himself. Only when he felt the sharp pain piercing his ear lobe followed by a pinch when Louis fastened the backing, did his smile begin to fade.

“Done!”

“Really?” Harry had to ask to be sure. He had felt it but it still felt so unreal he had to check.

“Really.” Louis laughed and slapped Harry’s hand down when he tried to touch his ear. “No touching! It has to stay as sterile as possible.”

“Am I allowed to see it?” Harry grinned.

“Of course, you numpty.” Louis rolled his eyes and handed him a small mirror. “It looks good, doesn’t it?” Harry asked as he admired the golden piece of jewellery in his now-slightly throbbing ear.

“It does. Everything looks good on you though.”

“You look good on me.” Harry grinned pulling Louis to sit on his lap and kissed him.

“Oh, we’re on that again, are we?” Louis teased and nipped Harry’s lower lip between his teeth.

“On what…?” Harry asked innocently, even though his cock was already throbbing in his pants.

“Mmm, nothing. Maybe I misunderstood…” Louis playfully tried to untangle himself from Harry who immediately pulled him back.

“I… want to… thank you…” Harry panted between the kisses.

“And how have you planned to do that…?” Louis asked, slipping his hands into Harry’s curls.

“I’m gonna fuck you first…” Harry drawled, grabbing Louis’ firm bum with his hands.

“And then…?”

“And then I'm gonna take you to New York tomorrow…”

***

It was never meant to happen, but the next afternoon Louis found himself squeezed into a crampy economy class middle seat on his way to New York.

Yes, after Harry had managed to talk him into going on the trip with him, he had obviously promised to buy him a plane ticket (business, of course) too. It had been like a reprise from their locker room conversation, but this time Louis had kept his sanity intact and declined the offer. Instead, he booked himself a ridiculously expensive last-minute ticket to New York for the same flight Harry was taking. Of course, a few minutes later he had his ticket in his email and his credit card charged for five hundred and forty-nine US dollars, to which Louis cursed his own pride and stubbornness into the seventh circle of hell.

Right now, Harry was sitting at the front of the plane in a big comfortable seat, while Louis was stuck in the back row where the seats didn’t even recline. On his other side sat a lanky teenage boy whose only focus was on the video game in his hands. The seat to his left was occupied by a grey-haired grumpy looking woman in her late sixties filling in her sudoku squares. When Louis took a closer look at the puzzle, he was quite positive the numbers drawn into the crisscross didn’t fulfil the requirements for the correctly filled sudoku. When the lady sensed Louis was observing her, she cast a gaze of disapproval over her low hung glasses and twisted her whole body away into an angle where Louis couldn’t see her booklet anymore. Louis rolled his eyes in protest and tried to hide his laugh. He turned the music louder and closed his eyes.

When the aircraft landed a few hours later at JFK, Louis didn’t rush to get off the plane. Not that he could have, even if he had wanted. The Airbus had barely stopped at the gate when the first passengers were already jumping up into the narrow aisles. It's a wonder there weren’t more arguments happening, Louis thought, as he watched how people argy-bargied about, pulling out their luggage from the overhead lockers, simultaneously hitting other passengers with them.

Louis also knew whilst he was jammed in the chaos in the rear, Harry would be escorted off the plane first. There should be someone waiting for Louis too, and they would take him to the hidden car park where Harry would be waiting for him. When Louis stepped out of the gangway leading into the airport terminal, there was only one man left standing with a sign which was written in blue block letters ‘Mr T.’.

“Mr Tomlinson, I assume.” The guy holding the sign stepped closer with a big smile.

“Yeah, how’d you guess?” Louis grinned and took a look around the empty hall.

“I was told to look for a small cute guy with a good bum.” He winked and checked Louis out by wiggling his eyebrows.

Louis burst into laughter and the handler, whose ID badge read Jamie, seemingly looked relieved that his shameless flirting hadn’t gone too far. Louis didn’t mind a little harmless banter from time to time. And he had to admit the guy was quite good looking after all; tall, blond and sun-kissed. Maybe he looked a bit too artificial for Louis’ type, with his wide line of pure white teeth and clearly chiselled jawline, but he was definitely funny and Louis enjoyed his company for the time it took for them to walk through the terminal.

When they reached the car where Harry was already waiting for them, Louis couldn’t help but notice the glum look on Harry’s face. He quickly tipped Jamie and pulled Louis closer to kiss him on the lips despite the audience they had. Jealousy, in big amounts, was a red flag for anyone but Harry looked as harmless as an angry little kitten ready for a fight at the idea of someone trying to take Louis away from him. As a consequence, he just held Louis close to him all the way into Manhattan pressing light kisses on his temple every now and then and Louis couldn’t help but purr in response.

*  
It had been well past midnight when they had arrived at Harry’s flat. Cabs had been zipping along the avenues in a constant stream of yellow but the neighbourhood near the building Harry lived in seemed to be much more tranquil. Neither of them had been extremely tired and when Harry suggested an evening walk, it was easy for Louis to say yes.

Harry had known a deli nearby that was open 24/7 and they had picked up huge sandwiches and a couple of sodas for a late meal. They ended up sitting on a worn-out wooden bench by the Hudson River and ate their takeaway while admiring the scenery.

For Harry, of course, it wasn’t something new and exciting but Louis couldn’t stop marvelling at the flickering lights from Lower Manhattan where skyscrapers pointed their frames towards the skies. Across the dark river, the silhouette of Jersey City greeted them with a modest profile compared to Manhattan. A casual dog walker or late-night jogger passed them from time to time where they sat long after they had finished their sandwiches. Even Harry had relaxed and stopped looking over his shoulder like he had done while they had been walking the streets. But when Louis had mentioned they could go back to his flat, Harry had just waved his hand in the air and told Louis not to worry about him.

Now that they had been sitting together in peaceful silence, Louis conjured up enough courage to ask Harry a question that he almost surely already knew the answer to.

”Is it me, or is it your celebrity status that makes you so scared to be seen right now?”

”What do you mean?” Harry asked, staring out into the night.

”You’re not out, are you?” Louis said quietly.

”To the public?” Harry replied after a long pause that Louis was almost sure he wouldn’t even answer. ”No. But my family and friends know who I am.”

”How about your team? Do they know you’re gay?” Louis hated to ask these questions but he also just needed to know. Not because of his own curiosity but to understand who Harry really was.

”Yeah, obviously.” Harry laughed bitterly. ”I was quite open about my sexuality when I was younger but they thought it wasn’t a good idea to mention it at all because of my fanbase.”

”Sorry that I asked.” Louis said, gently stroking Harry’s forearm. It was easily detectable that the subject wasn’t something he wanted to talk further about.

”You can ask whatever you want to.”

”But I don’t want to upset you.”

”You don’t. It’s the situation that bothers me, not your questions.” Harry assured, smiling faintly but Louis wasn’t convinced about that. Before Louis had a chance to say anything else, Harry had started to whine about being cold and the conversation had ended there. On their way back to Harry’s, the chatter had circled back to lighter topics once again.

*

The next morning Louis woke up alone inside a massive apartment. Even though Harry had told him it might happen because he had a very busy day ahead with fittings, dinner and only god knows what else, it still stung a bit. It was almost scary how much he needed Harry next to him, to feel his firm body wrapped around him like a lovesick octopus. Harry definitely was a cuddly sleeper. And Louis, who usually hated to be touched when he was sleeping, was now longing for it without any reasonable explanation, giving rise to an uncomfortable sensation that took up space in his belly.

After stretching his stiff muscles, Louis tossed the duvet aside and hopped out of bed. He grabbed the first t-shirt he saw laying on the chair across from the bed and pulled it on. It was Harry’s and the hem was long enough to cover his bum and other critical parts so he didn’t bother finding a pair of clean boxers before taking a shower. Now he just settled on brushing his teeth after using the loo.

He took his time wandering around the empty flat and took a peek out of every window. It wasn’t a penthouse but still located on the upper floors so he could still take in the scenery over Manhattan that was quite magnificent. It had a completely different kind of decor than Harry’s LA home but despite that, there were some details that were easy to connect to Harry, feel his presence here. Pink peonies on the tables, intersectional feminism books on the shelves, pieces of art that reflected Harry’s goofy personality; just to name a few.

Louis had no idea when and how Harry had had time to prepare pancakes but when he found himself in the kitchen as the final destination on his self-guided house tour, Louis found a stack of golden pancakes waiting on the plate alongside a bowl of plump blueberries and maple syrup. Louis put them in the microwave to warm them up a little bit and then pulled the hem of his shirt lower to save a chair from his bare bum before sitting down at the table next to the window to ravenously devour them.

There he had time to think about what he wanted to do today. He probably wouldn’t see Harry today until late at night so he could do whatever he wanted to. Tomorrow, Harry had said, he could tag along with him. Not to the MET gala, of course, but he could go to the after-party.

MET Gala.

Louis hadn’t even heard about it before and when Harry had told him with pride in his eyes that he was going to co-host the event, Louis hadn’t been able to ask what the MET gala even was. Later he had briefly texted Lottie, asking if she knew something about it. She had almost come through the screen when she had explained and Louis had come to the conclusion it was, in fact, a big fucking thing. However, when Lottie had inquired why Louis was asking about it, he had just sent her the emoji with a zipper-mouth. Lottie knew too many people from her fashion circles and Louis wasn’t going to take any risks that she could slip and reveal something to someone she shouldn’t.

So as a safer alternative, Louis had opened up to Fizzy a bit more. Well, all of it. He poured his whole heart out to his sister because he needed to get it off his chest. This whole thing with Harry was something he couldn’t understand at all and he had hoped when he could talk about it to someone, he could maybe see it from a better perspective afterwards. He hadn’t mentioned Harry by his full name, but Louis knew Fizz was smart enough to solve the puzzle; she had seen his photos with Harry after all.

So, at the end of the day, Louis wasn’t any wiser to his situation with Harry, and Fizzy’s ominous words ‘Don’t fall in love with him, he is totally from another world than us.’ echoed in his mind long after the phone call. Too late, a small voice from within tried to warn him but Louis quieted it curtly and muttered the same phrase to himself from Fizzy about the holiday romance.

Last night Harry had offered a car for Louis to use for sightseeing, but Louis had politely turned down the offer. This time it had nothing to do with his stubbornness, only that he felt the experience would be more authentic and real if he were to walk around and use the New York subway system. Louis fit in as much as he could on one of those garish double-decker sightseeing tour buses, including stops at the Empire State Building, Times Square, the Broadway theatres, and Rockefeller Centre (including a tour of the Saturday Night Live studio thanks to a last-minute cancellation).

Later in the evening, he returned back to Harry’s empty flat carrying multiple shopping bags filled with souvenirs and a greasy brown paper bag of Chinese takeaway that he had picked up on the way from the subway station. It was exhausting trying to see everything in one day in a place like New York was virtually impossible but Louis had done his best in the given time frame. After crashing on the sofa with his takeaway and finally giving his feet the rest they have been begging for, Louis didn’t regret his choice to see the City at all. It was all worth the effort and Louis couldn’t feel more content.

Two hours later he crawled in bed, belly full of food and fell asleep almost immediately. He didn’t even wake up when Harry climbed into the bed and pulled him close to his chest and kissed his forehead good night.

The next day they slept in, having a lazy morning in a bed cuddling and talking about whatever came to their minds. Pillowtalk was something Louis had always thought he was way too restless to enjoy but with Harry, even that felt like coming home; safe and familiar.

*

The blond short-haired man who notably reminded Louis of Gunther from the tv show ‘Friends’ busied himself around Harry and made him change his outfits one after another and handed the previous clothes to a thin young man who ran them somewhere and returned with a new dressing bag. From time to time, an older long-haired man who spoke English with a strong Italian accent came into the room and the words ‘fantastico’ and ‘magnifico’ filled the Gucci showroom they had gathered in.

People were rushing around carrying garments, cameras were flashing, photographers were snapping pictures and Louis felt like he was trapped in a gigantic beehive from where he wanted to escape before he became crazy. The buzz around him was draining and sitting in the corner doing nothing felt just stupid and frustrating. Almost as though Harry could read his mind, he strutted over to Louis and dragged him into the next room, away from the campy madness.

“Sorry,” Harry said after he had kissed Louis briefly.

“What are you apologizing for now?” Louis asked, tilting his head.

“Because you’re bored and clearly want to be anywhere else than here,” Harry said nodding towards the phone that Louis had used to entertain himself that was still in his hand.

“I’m fine.” Louis insisted slipping the phone into his back pocket but the power behind his words was lacking.

“You’re not and it was selfish for me to force you to come here with me simply because I wanted to keep you around.”

“Harry, stop that! I’m capable of saying if I don’t want to go somewhere.” Louis cursed himself for not being able to hide his inner feelings well enough. But sitting anywhere and just doing nothing was something Louis had never been good at.

“But also, too polite to say if you want to leave earlier.” Harry challenged before adding, “You can go if you want to.”

“I know I can go, but I don’t want to,” Louis said with a firmer tone now. “I admit the chaos on the other side of the door could be too much from time to time, but I also know how much this all means to you and that’s why I’m not planning to go anywhere,” Louis said, and when a broad smile spread across Harry’s face, Louis knew he had made the right decision when he had decided to stay.

The feeling just didn’t last long.

“Oh shit, I forgot about Jeff!” Harry shrieked, suddenly slapping his hand against his mouth. He nervously started to walk around the small room glancing at Louis every now and then. Finally, he stopped in the middle and stated, “We have to downplay you.”

“We have to do what?” Louis asked, regret already starting to sneak back.

“Make you less visible.”

“Ok...” Louis nodded as though the reply would have made Harry’s declaration perfectly clear. He opened his mouth to speak but paused for a moment, rubbing his temples before sighing. “I’m quite sure I'm gonna regret even asking but what the hell are you even talking about? Your train of thought is sometimes so tangential that I’m not sure if even you can follow along with it.”

“I don’t want Jeff to recognise you.” Harry simplified.

“Why would he care? I thought he knew.” Louis frowned.

“Because of the picture of us. From the trolley. He uhh, wasn’t a fan of it.” Harry winced, looking seemingly uneasy.

“Why? There was nothing incriminating about it.”

“Apparently, we looked too cosy together.” Harry scrunched his nose.

“You were clingy, I can’t deny that, but I still don’t understand what all of this has to do with your need to ’downplay me’.”

“The MET after party.” Harry sighed. “Jeff is coming too. I don’t want him to connect you to the guy from the photo.” Louis couldn’t deny that those words had hurt, but at the same time, he understood what Harry meant. This was his big night and Louis wasn’t going to ruin it.

“I really can’t change my face, you know. Maybe I should just stay at your flat instead. I don’t want you to get in any trouble because of me.” Louis offered.

“No, no. I’ll figure out something.” Harry said and sprinted out the door.

“That’s what I’m afraid of…” Louis muttered in the empty room, stopping in the front of a wide mirror to observe his reflection. Of course, Harry was right, Louis admitted. Maybe no one paid attention to him in the streets of New York but at a fashion event, Jeff and everyone else would notice him in a heartbeat.

“Here!” Harry rushed back carrying a bunch of hangers adorned with clothing. He hung them on the rack and handed the first outfit to Louis. “Sorry, I don’t have the proper shoes yet. When we find you the perfect ensemble, we’ll choose the shoes then.”

“I don’t think shoes are the real problem here now…” Louis muttered when Harry pushed him behind the curtain in the corner.

“Show me!” Harry’s excited voice demanded.

“I have just one word for you,” Louis said when he stepped out of the cubicle. “NO!”

“What’s wrong with it?” Harry sounded disappointed.

“It’s a windbreaker,” Louis said, with a trace of disgust in his voice.

“It’s Gucci,” Harry said, offended.

“It still doesn’t change the fact that it’s a windbreaker and my final answer is no.”

“Ok, try this one next.” Harry gave up and handed Louis the next outfit that didn’t look any better than the one he was wearing right now. Stripes have never been Louis’ thing.

“Harry,” Louis said, watching himself in the mirror wearing the second set of clothes “promise me something.”

“What?”

“Never ever try to do a makeover on anyone else again.”

“This isn’t so bad. I like your bum in these.” Louis had to admit Harry was right that his bum looked good in snug, red chinos but this definitely wasn’t his style.

“I look like a twink from some boy band with these,” Louis announced wrinkling his nose and stretching the braces out a couple of times.

“So, is this a no too?” Harry pouted.

“Yup!” Louis laughed, “Let’s hope this last outfit is a success then.”

Not one minute later Louis emerged from behind the dressing curtain.

“Oh, Louis!” Harry slapped his hands together delightedly. “You look wonderful!”

Louis quietly looked at his reflection in the mirror. Turned around. Then turned in the opposite way. “Hmm.”

“Does that mean you like it…?”

“It doesn’t look too ba—” Louis couldn’t even finish his sentence before Harry was already dragging him out of the door.

“Now, let’s find you some shoes and get your hair done!”

Yeah, this was going to be a long night, Louis thought and followed Harry to the bustle awaiting them from the other side of the door.

*

Drink in hand, Louis sat alone at one of the tables that lined the walls of the basketball-court-turned-nightclub, where the after-party by Gucci was held. The venue was still half empty, but Louis knew the Gala itself was just about to end any minute now and then the big names participating would start to appear. Now, Louis assumed, most of the people were Gucci personnel; dressmakers and designers, and there must be some other guests of the co-hosts like himself.

It had been easy to get into the venue with the printed invitation and when his name was also matched up on the guestlist, the host at the door had welcomed Louis in with a genuine smile and guided him towards the bar. Louis had hesitated between his usual beer and some kind of fancy cocktail, and in the end, ordered a vodka-based drink from the menu. From the first sip, he knew it had been an excellent choice; it was sweet and tangy and that would make it dangerous because it tasted more like lemonade than alcohol and he would get drunk without even noticing it.

Maybe the plate of appetizers he had been sampling with his drink would prevent the booze from going straight to his head. Earlier, when he had been sitting in Starbucks having a cup of tea and a blueberry muffin while following the red-carpet event live stream from his phone, Louis had been way too nervous for Harry to eat even half of it and now he was starving.

When Harry had finally appeared onto the screen, Louis had almost screamed, just like the hundreds of fans outside the museum were screaming through the live stream. There has been no sign of the nerve-wracked Harry that Louis had seen earlier in the afternoon. Louis soon realized that focusing his energy on Louis and his outfits had been Harry’s way of getting rid of his own anxiety, and it had been easy to play along. But now seeing him walk on the red carpet, Harry looked cool as a cucumber. Even with the cameras flashing around him as he went from one interview to another, Louis was so fucking proud of him.

And not to mention how fucking hot Harry had looked!

Even though Louis had seen his outfit earlier in the showroom, it hadn’t felt the same there. Now that Harry’s hair and nails were finished, and the single pear-shaped pearl earring hung from his freshly-pierced ear (ouch!) in his sheer black blouse, the sight of him parading around with a fresh take on ‘camp’, went straight to his dick.

Only then did it occur to him that they never ended up having sex the previous night or this morning. Louis had been so totally content to just have Harry next to him that he hadn’t even realized that something essential was missing from their usual interaction.

Harry arrived with his entourage just as Louis had almost finished his third drink. He had sent a quick text prior, so Louis expected him to appear soon. However, Louis didn’t expect that it would take almost half an hour for Harry to acknowledge him personally. The disappointment burned behind his eyelids but there was no way he would let Harry see it. No, because he assumed when Harry arrived it would be them again. Just like it had been the past few days.

Harry was also the ‘man of the hour’ today, and Louis had known it which became clearer every second as people gathered around him to congratulate and praise his outfit.

In moments like this, Louis felt like an outsider.

Fizzy was right, this wasn’t his world and right now, he didn’t know what the hell he was even doing here. Thankfully the outfit Harry had chosen for him - a dark red cowl neck jumper, black jeans rolled up at the ankle and a black silk bomber jacket - helped him to assimilate with the other guests, but mentally he couldn’t be further from them. A dark thought crossed Louis’ mind while he waited for his drink at the bar: Would it be like this all the time if he and Harry were dating?

Fuck, where did that even come from? Louis tried to assure himself it was just the vodka talking, but deep inside he knew that wasn’t the whole truth.

“Hi,” Someone whispered into Louis’ ear and it took a moment for Louis to realize it was actually Harry. His hands were balanced gently on Louis’ hips, his lips softly pressed against Louis’ cheek, Louis turned to see Harry smiling in his goofy outfit and instantly helped him forget all the doubts he just had.

“Your bow is a bit wonky.” Louis smiled and lifted his hands like he was trying to straighten the big red lopsided bow Harry was now wearing alongside a white blouse and extremely high-waisted trousers.

“You like it?”

“I do.” Louis admitted. Just then he noticed Harry hadn’t only changed his clothes, but his earring too. Now the pearl was replaced with the cross and Louis couldn’t help but to think how much it must hurt.

“How is it?” Louis asked, stroking his thumb gently near Harry's ear.

“Sore.” Harry admitted. “But I will survive. Now let’s party!” Harry said and wrenched Louis and himself into the crowd.

The night ended up being awesome, even though Harry wasn’t next to him all the time. But he introduced Louis to many people who dragged Louis on the dance floor even when he tried to say that he didn’t dance. All his objections fell on deaf ears and before the party was over, Louis realized he was dancing with Katy Perry dressed as a burger while Harry was playing songs behind the DJ’s mixing table.

If Louis had thought the party was over as the venue became emptier with every moment, he couldn’t be more wrong. There was an After-After Party. Of course! This private event was held on the rooftop bar of the hotel and only fifty guests were invited. The music was loud, champagne floated around on trays and Harry himself was circulating with platters of snacks taking care of the hungry guests like the good host Louis knew he liked to be.

At some point, Louis sat himself down on a sofa with a lovely couple. Louis had seen them at the Gucci party too, but Harry had never introduced them to one another; which actually seemed weird when Louis thought about it now. They had been chatting for a while when the woman finally stretched her hand and said: “I’m Glenne, by the way.”

“Louis,” Louis replied and took the hand she was offering. He saw the couple exchange a look that made Louis feel a bit uncomfortable. When he leaned back in his seat, Louis noticed that the man was still looking at him with a speculative gaze.

“Jeff.” He finally stretched his hand out to Louis without blinking his eyes but in that second Louis realized not only had he met the infamous ‘Jeff the manager’, but also received some kind of telepathic blessing from him. Since that interaction, Harry’s behaviour seemed to be more carefree than earlier and Louis must admit, it felt really good to see him relax.

After partying till dawn, they stumbled into Harry’s apartment where Louis continued kissing Harry eagerly, having already begun making out in the lift to his floor and their clothes had been long gone before they even ended up in the bedroom.

It wasn’t slow. It was a raw, almost animal kind of lust that engrossed them. Deep kisses, sweaty bodies and a level of heat Louis didn’t know even existed. There was no need for long foreplay because it had already lasted for hours now; all the teasing, dancing and secretly stolen kisses, it all led up to this moment. Louis barely contained himself while Harry quickly prepped him and then impatiently pushed his fingers out and replaced them with his marvellous cock.

And then Louis rode.

He was riding like his life depended on it. Every frantic roll of his hips took them higher and higher. The world around them disappeared and it was just them and this amazing feeling Louis didn’t want to lose. It wasn’t just the pleasure he was feeling, it was something embedded deeper that Louis couldn’t describe. But somehow the words ‘I love this’ spoke out in his internal thoughts, but Louis pushed the thought away quickly. It was way too soon, and anyway, it was out of his reach. He closed his eyes and gave into the euphoria he felt as he ground his hips into small circles.

The big bang finally shook their own little universe and stars flew around in Louis’ eyes, making him feel feather-light and happy. But when the bliss eventually started to fade into the darkness of the night, there was only one thought left in Louis’ mind.

Harry was out of reach.

***

”Thank you.” Harry smiled to the flight attendant who placed his fruit platter on the folding table. It felt good to eat fresh, healthy food after two nights of partying.

In the late afternoon, they ordered a four-cheese pizza and decided to eat it in bed because they had been too lazy to move to the sofa. Harry knew his housekeeper wouldn’t be thrilled about the grease stains in sheets, but Harry had left her a generous tip for leaving that level of mess behind. Usually, he took care of the daily light housework himself and opted to leave the more labour-intensive tasks like vacuuming for her, but today he just hadn’t been able to motivate himself to put things in order.

Harry took a gulp from his water glass and yawned. It looked like the fatigue was finally starting to set in. When they had boarded the plane, Harry had felt surprisingly energetic and the memories from the previous night, especially when they had returned back to his flat, began to flood back and had made Harry feel almost like he was high.

Watermelon sugar high.

Harry smirked at his own thought and bit into the slice of fruit that had conjured the words. He finished the rest of the plate while watching out the window, admiring the dusk that seemed to last forever as they travelled against time. The thick glass that shielded the cabin from the freezing air was enough to create the illusion of a warm summer night while the sun was setting. The taste of the sweet strawberries on his tongue just amplified the ethereal feeling of the scenery and painted a poetic image in his mind.

When the tableware had been collected and the table folded away, Harry stretched his hand up to lower the window shade so he could take a short nap. Louis, who at this time had easily complied to fly in business class with Harry, had already been asleep since the takeoff. Harry adjusted his travel blanket that was in danger of slipping off his shoulder and swiftly brushed his cheek with his finger, smiling fondly. Then Harry reclined his seat, and pulled his blanket up over his shoulders and closed his eyes.

Watermelon sugar high. Watermelon sugar high. Watermelon sugar high.

The line was playing on repeat in Harry’s head when he startled awake in the middle of very restless sleep. Shit, Harry thought and started to scramble around his faithful Mickey Mouse Gucci travel bag to find his moleskin journal and a pen. He didn’t have time to think as the words were welling up from somewhere inside of him and he felt out of the body, as if it was just the hand and not he, that was writing them down. After the last word was scribed on the white page, Harry slammed the book closed and tried to regain a steady breath once again.

The writing process usually was so all-encompassing that he couldn’t reach the feeling of the lyrics easily afterwards, but now his chest was filled with the warmth that the closeness of Louis seemed to increasingly stir up inside him -- an airy feeling, sweaty hands, a constantly fluttering heart... Harry considered himself an expert of love because he loved love. There were numerous couples he had brought together over the years and even more love songs he had written about, but he had never actually felt how it was to be in love.

Until now.

It felt almost impossible how swiftly and powerfully love had hit him when he finally had found the person to fall into it with. It was never meant to be like this. Three more days and Louis would be gone; out of his life almost as soon as he had appeared. From the beginning, there had been this silent agreement about how their relationship would be and it had always come with an expiration date and at the time Harry had figured that it was better than nothing from Louis at all.

But now, after his realisation, he wasn’t ready to give up so quickly. Harry decided at that moment there must be a way to change their trajectory.

*

“Could you tattoo me, Louis?” Harry asked after they had just finished their dinner and were still sitting on the terrace overlooking the Hollywood Hills.

“I suppose I could ask Zayn if we could use his studio tomorrow.” Louis offered as he began to reach his phone off the table.

“I was thinking more like now.” Harry clarified and added biting his lip “I might have a tattoo gun of my own. As well as all the needed equipment.”

“Of course, you do.” Louis snorted amusedly. “Ok, then. Was there something particular you had in mind, or do you want me to sketch something?”

“I was just thinking of a simple text ‘California’ on my thigh.” So I would have at least something permanent to remember about you, Harry added in his mind. His plans haven’t taken any major steps forward since their return and Harry started to feel desperate.

“With your handwriting or mine?”

“Yours!” Harry practically screamed, causing Louis to give him a weird look. “Could we do it now?”

“Someone is eager.” Louis laughed but followed Harry who had already begun his way downstairs to where his tattoo studio was located.

“You really have everything here.” Louis said looking around. “Have most of your tattoos been done here then?”

“No, not really,” Harry admitted, slightly ashamed. “Just this shamrock Niall made me a few years ago and my other friend tattooed these recently,” Harry explained, pulling the bottom of his trackies up to show Louis his Si and No tattoos on both his knees.

“Aha.” Louis muttered and then asked, swiping his hand in the air. “What’s the point of having this all then?”

“I had the gun and it felt stupid to have it without the other stuff.” Harry shrugged.

“Dafter that having a complete tattoo studio and never using it?” Louis asked, cocking his eyebrow.

“Well, when you say it like that, I think maybe I went overboard, a little.” Harry pinched his thumb to his index finger and held it up at eye level.

“Just a tad.” Louis laughed. “Good, then you’re finally able to use it again.”

“Yeah.” Harry admitted, watching how Louis was getting his instruments prepped and ready. “How did you end up as a tattoo artist?”

“It’s a long story.” Louis said shortly and wiped Harry’s thigh with disinfectant before shaving the area.

“I have time.”

“Yeah.” Louis replied without raising his gaze.

“Lou,” Harry said, taking Louis’ hand briefly into his own to magnify his next words, “You can talk to me, you know.”

“Yeah.” Louis nodded and this time Harry let him be. He couldn’t force Louis to tell him anything he didn’t want to. There was something behind the walls Louis had built up around him and it felt almost impossible for Harry to penetrate. Now that Harry had thought about it, it has been that way all the time. They had talked a lot but when it came to their childhood or families, stories that had shaped them to be the men they were now, Louis hadn’t actually revealed anything personal about himself.

The question who Louis really was, seemed to remain a mystery for now.

*  
Later that night when Harry retreated upstairs on his way from the laundry room, he heard muted music playing from somewhere on the second floor. As he walked closer, he realised someone was in fact playing the piano in his music room. And since it wasn’t him, the only other option was Louis.

Harry stopped in the doorway and listened as the sad notes of Robbie Williams’ Angels filled the air. Louis’ delicate fingers were running across the keys so easily that it was clear he had a long history with playing the instrument. His handwork looked much more effortless than Harry’s own, but it was strange as Louis had never mentioned anything about music when they had talked about it.

One more puzzle to solve, Harry thought and stepped inside the room.

“You play piano.” Harry said, trying not to scare Louis, who was sitting with his back towards the doorway.

“I used to play.” Louis replied, halting his adept fingers.

His answer sounded alarm bells in Harry’s head. On the first day, Louis had been to his house, Harry had asked him the same question about reading books, and his response had been almost word for word to what he said now. This time the situation felt different and Harry sensed he might be closer to breaking through the barrier between them but he had to tread lightly as one wrong word could take them both back to square one, or worse. Harry sat down on the sofa and feverishly tried to figure out how to continue the conversation.

This time, however, it was Louis who began to speak first.

“It’s been five years since I last played piano.” Louis said quietly. “It was this same song. At my Mum’s funeral.”

“Oh.” Slipped from Harry’s lips before he was able to control himself. “I’m sorry, about your mum.”

“Thank you.” Louis replied, hitting the final notes of the song. He hunched there on the bench, staring down at the keys and then as if in a slow-motion film he lowered the key lid. A fragile silence enrobed them in the room and Harry barely dared to breathe in case it shattered and the moment was gone.

“I have kinda learnt to accept that she’s gone forever. Because I really don’t have any other choice.” Louis whispered. “But I miss her so fucking much every single day—” Louis’ voice broke into a sob.

“C’mere.” Harry didn’t hesitate to close their distance and gently hoisted him up, cradling his left arm around his shoulder. Louis didn’t resist as Harry walked him to the couch he had been sitting on and pulled him into his arms. Louis felt tiny and fragile as his head rested against Harry’s chest and he soothingly stroked slow circles onto Louis’ back to help him calm down.

Or maybe to calm himself down.

Harry wasn’t sure anymore. Slowly, Louis’ rigid frame began to ease and noticing it helped Harry to relax as well. They both remained silent for a long time, and it would have been easy to forget they might be in the middle of something significant. Something that could push their relationship onto an entirely new level.

“Do you miss him?” Louis asked suddenly. He was now laying on the sofa and resting his head against Harry’s thighs. His eyes were now open again but instead of at Harry; his eyes were aimed somewhere on the ceiling.

“Robin…?” It took a while for Harry to understand who Louis was talking about. He brought up the passing of his stepfather, Robin, the day after they met, hoping it would encourage Louis to open up more about himself after he seemed to shut down when the subject of the family was brought up.

“Yeah. I do.” Harry easily admitted. Perhaps their situations weren’t exactly the same, but despite him not being Harry’s biological dad, he had been a big part of his life since he was a kid. It angered Harry that Robin had been referenced as just a stepdad in the headlines after his passing.

“Have you come to terms with it? His passing I mean.”

“I think I have.” Harry said, after considering his answer for a moment. “Although he was sick quite for many years prior and since the beginning of his illness we knew what the prognosis was going to be. But when the time eventually came, it was still a huge shock. I wasn’t prepared for how much it would actually affect me and everything about my life.”

“How did you do it? How did you get over it?” Louis aimed his question toward the ceiling, to the same place his eyes seemed to be.

“Well, first I didn’t get over it. Death isn’t something one ‘gets over’. It’s not a physical feat or hurdle. It’s emotional. It’s spiritual. It's just something you have to go through, and grieving is one of the parts of that process. Time helped, as cliché as it sounds. And talking -- that was such an important part of the grieving process for me. The best way out of something as tragic as loss is through.”

Louis laid still as he inhaled slowly and deeply. Harry sensed a change in the air as if the pressure in the room had shifted.

“She was my everything.” Louis said, his voice trembling slightly. ”She wasn’t just me mum, she was also me best mate. I told her everything, no matter how awful it was, and she never judged me. Of course, she was me mum and didn’t always approve of my actions, but she never used them against me, just tried to get me to learn from my mistakes.”

Harry silently acknowledged his admission by stroking the stray hairs away from his forehead. Allowing him the time and space to continue.

”Our dad left us when my twin sisters were just two months old.”

”That’s awful!” Harry couldn’t help but exclaim.

”Tell me about it.” Louis gave a dry laugh. ”You can only imagine what it was like to live in a house with a crying mum and two screaming, colicky babies.”

”We had to move to a smaller flat because we couldn’t afford the house we’d been living in before. Dad had said he would pay the rent to help us out, but mum was too stubborn and proud to accept his offer.”

Now Harry swallowed down the words ‘it must run in the family then’ because now wasn’t the time for that kind of banter. Harry realized this explained quite a lot about Louis’ own behaviour when it came to providing for himself and not accepting help, especially the monetary kind.

”So we moved into this tiny one-bedroom flat; me, Lottie and Fizzy slept in one room and mum and the twins slept in the living room. I know that my dad regularly bought us food and even she knew it would be stupid to refuse it. She had five kids to feed, after all.”

Harry sensed Louis was reliving his life story over again whilst telling it to Harry. He was going through all the buried feelings again; his voice and body language were betraying him even though his face remained almost expressionless as he spoke.

“I had to move to another school. I was a really late bloomer when it came to my height. Being a tiny newcomer wearing old-fashioned clothes was more than enough to make me the perfect target for these bullies.” Harry’s heart broke as he listened. He squeezed his free hand, the other one was resting on Louis’ belly, into a ball to transfer his anger out from somewhere.

“It didn’t take a long time for Lottie and Fizzy to notice I got bullied; they were in the same school after all and tried to defend me. As you can imagine, it really didn’t help when your sisters had to come and save you. I got them to swear they wouldn’t tell mum anything. I think they were willing to do it because they could see how hard a time she already had.”

“Of course I couldn’t hide for long, she found out later when I arrived home from primary school with torn clothes and scrapes and bruises scattered on my body. She pulled the whole truth from me and I must admit, it felt quite good to finally tell her about it. The next day she stormed to the school and spoke to the principal. The situation eased a bit after that, at least the physical side of the bullying ended there.”

“When I was fifteen, life took another path again. This time it was a positive one though. Mum worked as a midwife and she started to date this doctor who practised in the same hospital. Quite quickly it was clear that they had fallen in love. Of course, over the years mum had seen some blokes but she never introduced any of them to us children. One day she told us, “Dan” was coming for Sunday roast, we knew this was it.”

“Luckily, he turned out to be a decent guy. Great job, no skeletons in the closet and for the most part, he really loved mum. A few months later we all moved into his house, except Lottie who had just turned 18 and was already living in London. But it wasn't a new beginning only for mum, it was a huge opportunity for me too.”

“During that year, I had started to get the idea that I might be more into boys than I was girls. I found myself often jerking off to a photo of David Beckham on my wall instead of some third-page bird with massive tits. It was a scary thing to realise. Not because of my family, however. It was never a problem for them. Even my dad, who I had started to see again from time to time, turned out to be very tolerant when I finally told him a couple of years later. No, my biggest fear was the bullying and that it would start again and be even worse.”

“I didn’t realize it at the time, but I figured if I could change the outside, maybe the inside would change as well. Feel more comfortable in me own skin, ya know what I mean? During that summer I had got my first job and finally had some spending money. Not a lot, but some anyway. So, later that summer when I visited London, I had some money to do a bit of shopping. Went to Camden, and got enlightened.” Louis grinned for the first time since he had started sharing his life with Harry and hoisted himself up to a proper sitting position. He crossed his legs on the sofa and continued the story but this time actually facing Harry.

“You can only imagine mum’s face when she saw me coming back home wearing an electric blue mohawk.”

“My mum would have killed me.” Harry chuckled after the admission.

“Well, that’s not so far from what happened with mine either. But I had just seen the light at the end of the tunnel and was gripping onto that with all I had. Maybe that was the reason she eventually gave up. The only compromise I agreed to make wason my hair. So, at the end of summer, I had created an alter-ego before starting at a new school. Black hair, lined eyes, a few piercings, some new clothes...”

“You went pretty radical, huh…?” Harry solemnly enquired.

“You could say that.” Louis admitted. “But believe or not, it helped. Not that I would recommend it to anyone else, but for me it was salvation. I was finally able to be myself. If the way I looked gave me the confidence to read books publicly or admit I wanted to take piano lessons again or join the drama club, it was all worth it.”

“Drama club…?” Harry asked, surprised.

“Yeah.”

“I loved it. The atmosphere, being on stage, it was the best feeling ever. And the best thing was that in the theatre world it wasn’t a sin to be different, it was more like a bonus, in fact. And later, I was also accepted to study drama in London.”

“That’s awesome!”

“Yeah.” Louis replied grimly.

“It wasn’t?” Harry asked, confusion set between his brows.

“It was.” Louis nodded. “For as long as it lasted.”

”What happened then?”

”Mum got sick.”

“Oh.”

“I dropped out of school.”

“You did what?” Harry blurted out.

“Harry, she was me mum for crying out loud!” Louis retorted, sounding annoyed as he shifted his body away from Harry.

“I’m sorry, Lou.” Harry reached out to touch Louis’ shoulder to bolster the sentiment. “I really am. I guess I meant it like ‘why didn’t you take a leave of absence instead of making a final decision to formally drop out’?”

“It’s alright.” Louis answered. “And you’re not the first one to say it was a bloody stupid decision. Me mum was the first.” Louis added, grinning at Harry over his shoulder.

“She had leukaemia. Almost immediately we knew there was nothing they could do and her disease was progressing quite aggressively. The kids needed someone there to help, even though they wouldn’t admit it. The youngest ones were just toddlers and the twins weren’t even teenagers yet.”

“And you were the only one who could do it? How about your other sisters?”

“Lottie was busy, her career began to flourish by that time; I could have never asked her to give it up. And Fizzy always knew she wanted to be a teacher. I had only just discovered that theatre craze.”

“And that was worth sacrificing your own education and career? Because you thought it wasn’t as valuable as theirs?”

“It is what it is.” Louis stated shortly. “It’s how I came to be what I am today.”

Harry would have had more to say on the topic but let it go for now. “How did you end up a tattoo artist then?”

“Zayn.” Louis smiled shortly. “We lived in the same uni dorm when I moved to London. He studied Fine Arts but he knew he would end up tattooing later. During his second year in London, he had already found himself an internship in one parlour. I was practically his guinea pig when he was finally allowed to start practising on people.” Louis laughed as he pointed toward some of the smaller tattoos with his index finger.

“We had kept in contact after I returned to Doncaster. A year after my mum had passed and still had no clue what to do with my life, he asked me to come to London, promising he would help me find work. I never knew he had meant a job in the studio where he worked.”

“At first I was the ‘shop bitch’, but when the owner realised I could actually draw after he saw a few of my own tattoo sketches, he offered me an apprenticeship to ink.”

“Do you like it?”

“Yeah, it’s fine.” Louis shrugged.

“Do you think they would have taken you back to attend the Drama program at school?” Harry pondered aloud after hearing Louis’ response which he believed lacked the passion he had whilst talking about theatre.

“They might have. Never asked though.”

“Why not?”

“I just couldn’t go back.” Louis shook his head. “Since the beginning, she was so supportive of my dream to pursue a life in drama, and when I was accepted into the Drama program, I don’t know which one of us was more excited about it; me or her.”

“The downside of that was, that after she was gone, it all reminded me of her way too much. I just pushed it all aside; books, music, anything that connected me with that world, as if they never even existed. Even though I promised her I would go back to school, I just couldn’t.” Louis said, his voice trembling at the end.

“I promised her, but I just couldn’t…” Louis sobbed, wiping away the tears that cascaded down his cheeks with the back of his hand.

“Shhh…” Harry pulled Louis into an embrace and let him cry his pain away for a few moments.

“Now I look like a panda again.” Louis sniffed, trying to fix his smudged eyeliner.

“You look beautiful, Lou.” Harry said, cupping his cheeks with his hands. “You always do.” Harry dropped his hands from his face and grabbed one of Louis’ into both of his own and squeezed.

“I like you; you know. With or without your eyeliner. If you like how it makes you feel, then keep doing it. But what I mean is, that you don’t have to change your appearance to be able to be yourself. You don’t need to put on a mask to be who you are.”

Whatever reaction Harry expected, it wasn’t Louis pulling him into a kiss filled with so much emotion and tenderness that Harry felt he was about to burst from the feelings swirling about inside him.

Louis moved further into the kiss by straddling Harry’s lap where he was still sat on the sofa. He plunged his hands into Harry’s hair and cradled his head in his hands as he lunged in and out of kisses, angling his head occasionally from left to right, taking moments in between to look deep into Harry’s eyes, as if searching for something beneath the surface.

A surge from deep within came over Harry as he cupped Louis’ arse with both hands and stood up, squeezing his cheeks, encouraging Louis to wrap his legs around his waist as he bumped his way out of the music room and into his bedroom where he slowly lowered Louis onto the bed and crawled up to hover over him. Harry took this time to observe the soft expression and lines on Louis’ face and try to decipher the meaning behind the glow and expansion of his pupils.

Before he could form words in his mouth to describe what he was feeling Louis leant up to capture his lips with his own and slowly sucked onto his bottom lip as if to distract Harry from his thoughts.

It must have worked, Harry pulled back and began to trail kisses from below Louis’ ear and down the side of his neck, stopping briefly to lick and suck at his collarbones, breathing deeply in a subconscious effort to remember every detail and appreciate every pheromone that emitted from Louis’ pores.

Harry inaudibly mumbled “God, I need you. Always”

“Whassat?” Louis enquired, between moans.

“Umm, shirt. Off. I need you to take your shirt off.” He replied instead.

Louis pushed himself up with his hands into a semi-seated position in the middle of the bed. He raised his arms up slightly, silently asking to be undressed. Harry obliged as he pinched the hem at the bottom from both sides and pulled it up and over Louis' head, hurling it over his shoulder onto the floor. Louis raised his bum up slightly, enough for Harry to curl his fingers around the waistband of his trackies and boxers and shimmied both items down his legs before tossing them aside. He took that time to take off all of his own clothes, leaving them both panting and eyeing each other up and down.

Harry manoeuvred himself back between Louis’ thighs, grabbing the side of each one as he gently yanked him down the bed so they both fit like puzzle pieces when he laid down on top of him, elbows resting on either side of Louis’ head.

He dipped his head back down and began another session of slow, wet kisses, tongues sliding in and out of their mouths, sucking and nipping at whatever bit of flesh they could.

“Can we…?” Louis asked before pausing, hesitation filling his voice.

“What? Can we what?” Harry whispered back onto his lips.

“Can we..do this...like, slow?” Louis asked.

Harry felt his heart burst. He felt the hormones and neurotransmitters battling it out in his bloodstream. This. This is what he’s wanted since the first time they had sex. He enjoyed the fast-paced, lust-filled fucks they’ve had, but this. This is what he had been waiting for his whole life. To feel that connection with another person that goes beyond just physical pleasure. As he looked back into Louis’ eyes for confirmation as to what “slow” could be interpreted as, he saw it. He saw the walls crumble down and the barrier opens.

Harry dropped his forehead down to rest on Louis’ as he responded, “Yes, love, of course we can. We can take all night.”

Louis wrapped his arms around Harry and trembled slightly.

“Shhh….I’ve got you, love.” Harry kissed his forehead, then each cheek, and mapped a trail of kisses from his chin to his chest, down his sternum to his belly. As sexy as Harry tried to make his ministrations, Louis couldn’t help but giggle as his lips and his breath tickled his tummy.

“Stop, Lou, I’m trying to be sexy here”. Harry admonished, poorly disguising his grin.

“Ok, ok. I’m good. Just go somewhere a little more south, could ya?” Louis impatiently replied.

“No Lou, we have all night, just let me, please?” He pleaded. Harry knew Louis would normally have bit back with a sassy comment but he must have felt the urgency in Harry’s plea and remained silent, choosing to placate Harry with a small moan instead.

“Mmmm” Harry mumbled as he worked his way across both hips, then opened Louis’ legs into a relaxed V shape and peppered the inside of his left thigh with nips and kisses, all the way down to his ankle and back up the other leg to his opposite hip.

Louis began to gently thrust up, in a vain attempt to signal where he wanted Harry’s attention.

Harry sat up and tapped the side of Louis’ hip, encouraging him to turn over. Louis sighed but cooperated and rolled over onto his stomach, resting his head on his clasped hands.

Harry climbed up and sat on Louis’ arse before grasping the flesh of his neck and shoulders between his fingers and thumb, massaging and kneading his tissue into a further state of relaxation. Between ministrations, Harry bent down and littered kisses from his neck down the bumps of his spine, stopping just above his gluteal cleft. He squeezed his hands around each arse cheek as if he couldn’t get enough of it and compressed down on the muscles, aiding them to relax as well.

When Harry deemed Louis’ upper body had been sufficiently manhandled, he bit his way down each cheek and the backs of his thighs and calves. He bent one knee up and kneaded the arches of each foot before placing them back gently and trailing his tongue up one leg until he reached his arse and nipped his way up toward the middle of his low back.

He paused to look down at the beauty beneath him. How did he get so lucky? He thought back to the day they met, when it didn’t feel so lucky and he was getting snapped at by a random emo boy in the locker room, that, turns out, he first met on a trolley in WeHo when he was wasted. If only Harry from then knew what Harry from now was getting to do.

Louis’ wiggled his bum at the loss of movement, plunging Harry back into the present moment.

“Love, I’m gonna prep you now, K?”

“Hmm….yes please.” He replied.

“Let me know if you need more or need me to stop ok?”

“I’ll be fine, H”. Louis assured.

“Ok, but still. If you need to. You know you can.”

“Mmm-hmm”. Was all Louis’ would acknowledge.

Harry placed a pillow under Louis’ hips and again, squeezed and circled the muscles of his arse in each hand a few times before slowly dipping his tongue to his hole and tracing circles around the rim, every time it became visible between his hands. He blew cool air onto it from between his pursed lips and watched it flutter and relax.

“Mmmmm fuck that feels good.” Louis said.

“Mmmmm fuck that tastes good.” Harry added.

After several minutes of lapping slow and gently, circling his tongue around his rim, Harry sat up and grabbed the lube from the bedside table. He sat between Louis’ open legs and lifted his thighs up onto his own lap so that Louis’ cock was lined up on top of Harry’s. Harry snicked open the cap and poured a small amount onto his fingers and thumb. He began to massage Louis’ hole with the pads of each thumb, and after a few seconds, Louis began to grind his cock down onto Harry’s.

“How's that feel, baby? You like that?”. Harry innocently asked, knowing full well he did.

“You know I fucking do.” Louis replied before moaning and grunting.

“Mmmm, yeah I bet this feels really good.” Harry concurred. He definitely wouldn’t mind if the tables were turned.

He continued alternating the pads of his thumbs across the rim of his arse in a successful effort to loosen the outer ring of muscle to get inside of Louis.

After another minute of this, Louis began to grind down and hump so hard he had to stick his arse up to get away from the friction stating, “I don’t want to come like this.”

“How do you wanna come baby?”

“On your cock, Harry, please. I’m short of begging here.”

“No no, you’ll never have to beg for me or my cock. I’m always here, love. I’ll always be here.” He soothed.

He sealed off his confession by latching his mouth onto Louis’ hole, which was just inches from his face anyway. He worked as much of his rim open with his tongue as he could at this point, and simultaneously opened the lube up and coated his hand and squeezed some out right into Louis’ cleft and watched it slowly trickle down to his hole, and some going right past it and dripping down onto Harry’s cock.

The cool liquid caused Louis’ hole to flutter open and closed again, tormenting Harry into licking his lips and moaning again before shifting his body slightly to the right to get at a good angle to work his middle finger into his now slightly-relaxed hole. After working it in up to his knuckle he pulled his finger out just enough to slide his index finger in with it as well. The extra lube he used caused a squelching sound that went right to his dick. He used his free hand to squeeze and fondle his own balls that were practically blue by now. Harry reminded himself that he had all night and chastised his body for being so impatient. After all, this might be the last night they have like this.

With his mind back to the task at hand, no pun intended, Harry began to work those two fingers in and scissor them enough to fit in his ring finger. Harry, being the size that he is, knows that three just isn’t enough. After a few seconds of mewling from Louis’, he knew that the three were ready to become four and he slowly and gently screwed four into his hole, causing him to sweat at the sight.

“Lou, love, you ok? Want me to keep going?”

“Mmmm, so good. Keep going for a bit… Want you to slip right in.”

Fuck. Harry thought to himself as he looked down at his own dick, practically twitching at the thought of when they’re joined together when two become one. Fuck. Who even says that? But he meant it, he needed to be as far inside Louis’ body that he could reach the inner depths of his heart. He needed Louis to believe how much he wanted and honoured this aspect of their time together.

After another few minutes of careful swirling and scissoring, Harry pulled his hand out from Louis’ arse and grabbed the condom that sat by his foot. Louis’ whined at the loss of his fingers and stuck his arse up in the air a bit.

Harry chuckled as he fumbled to open the condom wrapper and place it properly onto himself. “Soon love, soon.” Once he rolled it to the base and made sure there was space at the tip, he generously applied lube to himself and onto three of his fingers which he ceremoniously plunged into Louis’ arsehole, still making sure he was open enough to ‘slip right in’.

“Come on love, turn over, wanna see you, wanna kiss you.” He encouraged.

Louis rolled over onto his back and hitched his legs up over Harry’s hips.

Harry bent down and placed soft, tender kisses onto his lips, blue balls be damned. He was going to enjoy every moment and savour the feeling of anticipation that brewed deep in his chest and his belly.

When satisfied that he waited as long as he possibly could, he lined his cock up with Louis’ hole and held an intense gaze into Louis’ eyes as he pushed in to the hilt. Once there, Louis’ eyes fell shut and his chin raised up high before moaning out “Ohhh fuck, Harry, fuck, yes stay there”. Harry obeyed and ground his hips into Louis’ arse for a few extra seconds before slowly pulling back out to the tip and slowly pushing back in at a snail's pace, for what felt like hours.

Harry raised his head back up, leaving a six-inch gap between their faces, as he panted, breathing in and out of his mouth. He watched Louis’ blissed-out expression as he took his time, feeling every centimetre of Louis’ walls, while Louis surely felt every inch of his cock fucking in and out as if in slow motion.

The feeling of anticipation in his gut gave way to feelings of euphoria but also with something he couldn’t quite put his finger on. It was light, and it fluttered, but it was more than the typical butterflies he had felt since he met Louis. This felt more grounded, almost as though it could be constant and everlasting.

The feeling was so overwhelming Harry felt tears well up in his eyes and quickly blinked them back, crashing his lips down onto Louis’ so he wouldn’t see them.

If only Harry kept his eyes open a moment longer he would have seen the same event happening in Louis’ eyes.

Harry dropped his chest down onto Louis in an effort to close off every gap between them, keeping Louis’ legs now loosely wrapped around the back of his legs.

“You ok?” He whispered to Louis.

“Yeah love, I’m really good.” Louis replied as he tried to inconspicuously swipe at his eyes.

Harry gyrated his hips in slow circles, clockwise and back trying to mentally stave off coming from the sensation and heat of Louis’ tight arse.

“I’m really close Harry, could you—”

Harry immediately sat up on his knees and leaned back onto his feet, and managed to keep Louis on his cock as he pulled Louis up onto his lap. He placed his arm around Louis’ lower back to keep him in place and snaked his right hand around Louis cock, aligned their chests up again, closing off the unwanted space between them. He kissed Louis with the same slow pace he fucked him with while jacking him off quickly.

Louis started to whimper into the kisses, letting Harry know what he was doing was working.

Harry picked up the pace of his tongue as it sucked and swirled around his mouth, grinding slowly into his arse and attempting to jerk the come right out from Louis. If Harry had stopped for a second to feel exactly what he was giving, he would have come right then in Louis. But he was so focused on feeling everything ‘Louis’ that he ignored his own body’s reaction and gave all that he had into making Louis come in a way he never had before.

Louis panted as the feeling of his climax took over every cell and fibre of his being and clung onto Harry as if his life depended on it.

Louis came all over Harry’s hand, and unbeknownst to them, some shot up to Harry’s chin.

“Come for me Harry, come in me love.” Louis pleaded.

That was all Harry needed to hear for him to grab Louis by the arse and focus on his own body as he thrusted up deeply into Louis’ arse as Louis wrapped his arms around his neck, encouraging him with “mm hmms” until he came inside Louis.

They both stilled in their upright position and panted laboriously over each other's shoulder to catch their breath.

Harry slowly lowered Louis back down on the bed, brushing his sweaty fringe off his forehead before kissing him gingerly on the mouth.

“That was different”.

“Hmm...yeah, it was.” Harry mused as he played with the short hair at the nape of Louis’ neck. He rolled onto his side, facing Louis as he continued to trace patterns onto Louis' neck and chest.

Louis rolled over onto his side to face Harry and smiled, his eyes crinkling enough to disappear altogether before stating, “I’m sleepy and you have come on your face”.

“What?!” Harry shouted as he brought his hand up to wipe it away. He was stopped by Louis, who darted in and licked it off his chin and pressed a chaste kiss to Harry’s lips, giggling wildly.

Harry laced their legs together and draped an arm over Louis’ back, pulling him close. As he lay awake listening to the rhythmic sound of Louis’ deep breathing turn fast and shallow, he couldn’t help but replay in his mind the sad story Louis told him a few hours ago and how it sparked hope inside that Louis would be ok in the end, and not close himself off anymore.

It’s not that Louis was a pushover, more so the opposite, but he seemed to trust Harry enough to share his deepest and most haunting memories with him. And the look in his eyes as their bodies lay intertwined in bed just before he closed his eyes to drift off to sleep, they had seemed to reflect Harry’s own feelings.

Or was this all just a figment of his own imagination about a deeper connection that was never really there to begin with?

***

“Are you happy?” Louis asked as they laid in bed the next morning, last night still fresh in his mind. It had been like a dream. Harry had fucked him in a way no one ever had before; everything he had done had been filled with so much tenderness, sweetness and love that in his sappy thoroughly-fucked mind he could even describe it as lovemaking. If he ever used that word in the first place.

“I am now.” Harry smiled, the remains of the afterglow still visible in his eyes as he looked down at Louis resting his chin on Harry’s chest.

“I mean generally. Are you happy?”

Something dark flashed in Harry’s green eyes before he turned his gaze away and just quietly stared off into the distance.

“Thank you.” Harry whispered in a small voice, finally breaking the silence between them.

“For what?” Louis furrowed his brows in confusion.

“For asking me if I am happy.” Harry explained, taking Louis’ hand into his own and brushing his knuckles while he spoke. “I don’t remember anyone doing it for ages. Everyone just expects me to be because of who I am. What reasons would I have to be unhappy?

“Are you then? Unhappy I mean.”

Harry quieted again but then slowly shook his head as a mark of denial. ”I wouldn’t call myself unhappy. I have too many things to be grateful for to be unhappy.”

“You can have everything and still be unhappy.” Louis reminded him.

“That’s true, too.” Harry agreed. “But I think most of the time I’m quite happy with my life.”

“And the rest of the time?”

“I think there might be moments when I feel lonely. Does that sound crazy? I have so many people in my life and still, when I come back home, I sometimes feel I have no one.” Harry responded in a melancholic voice.

“It doesn’t sound crazy at all.” Louis assured, his thumb stroking one of the swallows on Harry’s chest. “But do you know what does?”

“What?” Harry tilted his chin a bit to get a better look at Louis.

“I realised that yesterday, too. That since mum died, I have actually been quite alone with my thoughts.” Louis admitted.

“How about Zayn? And your family?” Harry asked. “I thought you’re very close to them.”

“I am.” Louis sighed. “This all feels really stupid.”

“No, talk to me. Please.”

“I just don’t want to bother them with my own shit.”

“What even makes you think your ‘shit’ would be some kind of burden for them.”

“Zayn has a new life with Liam.” Louis shrugged. “And my siblings have been trying to cope with life after losing their mum.”

“She was your mum as well.”

“But they needed someone they could turn to when they needed to talk.”

“And you say you weren’t justified to receive that too? Lou, talk to them about how you feel.” Harry gently urged.

“I said it feels stupid now.” Louis sighed. “Talking to you opened so many doors I have kept locked over the years. All the things I would have told mum, I have just kept them hidden away inside the safety of those rooms.”

“You don’t have to do that anymore, Lou. You can talk to me.” Harry said, planting a soft kiss on Louis’ lips. “Always.”

*  
Later, while finishing their late breakfast that should really be called lunch on the terrace, freshly showered and satisfied (because unsurprisingly one thing had led to another and an innocent shower soap drop had taken a turn in another direction), Louis thought about the conversation they had in bed. He knew Harry was right, he always had this habit of putting everyone else’s needs ahead of his own without thinking of the consequences it might cause him personally. But selflessness, if it could be called that, wasn't the only thing preventing him from expressing his thoughts and himself to anyone. He had completely closed himself off from the world.

Then he met Harry and all that changed.

But when he’s with him, the words just fly out of his mouth without a filter. It had felt so natural and right to confide in him things he never thought he would talk about ever again. Because he had felt Harry needed to know how he had become the person he was now. Know his history, give him all the pieces to work with and Louis even didn’t know why.

Because I have fallen in love with him.

The thought hit him as Harry was topping up Louis’ glass of water, wielding a blinding smile and then disappearing inside the house with their empty plates; leaving Louis sat there frozen in his realization. It felt like he had just been hit by a truck, gobsmacked by his own admission. An admission that shouldn’t have even been a surprise to him because in a way, he had known it ever since New York but never just admitted it.

“Do you want to go to the beach?” Harry’s voice stirred him out of his thoughts. Harry was looking up into the cloudless sky shielding his eyes with his hand. “Might be the last warm day before you go back home.”

Bang, and it all was gone.

He didn’t expect the cruel awakening back to reality to be delivered from Harry’s mouth. Tears burned his eyelids from behind the safety of his sunglasses, but Louis never let his smile fade, no matter how much it hurt.

“Yeah, sure. I’ll just go and grab my stuff.” Louis smiled tersely and rushed inside through the terrace doors. Harry didn’t seem to notice his sudden mood change and Louis was relieved at that. Maybe I could have become a good actor, after all, Louis thought bitterly as he closed the bathroom door behind him. He may have been able to fool Harry, but here in the darkness of the bathroom, there was no way of hiding the truth from himself.

Maybe this was a sign, Louis thought.

He’s come full circle. His journey in this house, in Harry’s life, had started in this very bathroom. He had known since the beginning this day would come soon. It had been the deal all along; just having fun as long as he was here. If only he knew then just how dangerous getting to know Harry would be. He had sensed how it might end and despite the little voice in his head that warned him not to, he still agreed to a holiday hook up. He should have followed his instincts and he wouldn’t be in this situation of unrequited love.

*  
Against all intentions, Louis hadn’t been able to say farewell to Harry after returning downstairs with his backpack, ready to move on. One look at Harry and all the promises he had made to himself while hiding upstairs had vanished into thin air and Louis had found himself sitting in the front seat of a marvellous yellow convertible on his way to Malibu.

Music had been blasting from the stereo as Harry sped down the world-famous Pacific Coast Highway and Louis silently kept his focus on the fleeting scenery. A couple of times he noticed Harry in his periphery looking at him but Louis ignored it, making him feel more of a total arsehole.

Before they arrived at the small private section of the beach, Louis had managed to pull together his best award-winning act again. A passerby would have seen a couple enjoying a fun day at the beach; sunbathing, throwing a ball in the silky sand and chasing the waves in the still too cold ocean. But inside, Louis was in turmoil.

Tick-tock. Tick-tock.

The clock was ticking way too fast and every minute brought him closer to losing Harry. The feeling was suffocating; his chest was aching, and he could barely breathe anymore. Louis had always thought when he finally found someone he would fall in love with; he would be in seventh heaven all the time.

Instead, he felt like a dead man walking.

Tick-tock. Tick-tock.

*

“Right, what you want to do next?” The innocent question from Harry was the straw that finally broke the camel’s back.

“Go home, Harry.” Louis said in an exhausted voice.

“What?” Harry turned to look at Louis frowning.

“I said, go home.” Louis repeated and sat upright on the sun lounger he was perched on. “And I’ll go to Zayn’s and we can forget this all ever even happened.”

“Where did all this come from?” Harry asked, now perched on the lounger, directly facing Louis with worry surging in his eyes. “I don’t understand Lou. Why do you suddenly want to forget everything?”

“I just can’t do this anymore.” Louis sniffed, kicking at a small piece of driftwood in the sand out of frustration.

“I, umm, thought you liked me too.” Harry said in a monotonous voice.

“I do.” Louis whispered.

“Why then? Darling, talk to me.” Harry reached out earnestly for Louis’ hand.

“I’m not your darling.” Louis yanked his hand away.

“I'm never gonna be anyone’s darling…” Louis muttered, pressing his clasped hands against his chest, as though the gesture would protect him from what’s happening right now.

“Why not?” Harry persevered. He got on his knees in the sand in front of Louis, gently untangling Louis’ tensed hands and brushed the thin skin on the back of it soothingly, making him feel home just by being there and Louis couldn’t take it anymore.

“Because everyone leaves me at some point anyway.” Or before I push them away when I get scared, Louis added inwardly.

“I have no intention of doing that.” Harry smiled and Louis wanted to believe him so much. But he knew better.

“Of course you don’t. No one intends to leave. It just happens and then I’m alone again.” Louis huffed and then more words spewed out of his mouth, “I don’t want to be alone anymore.” Louis had never allowed himself to be this vulnerable and open around anyone since his mum. It’s as if he has no control over his actions and something is speaking through him or for him, and it's unsettling.

“If I have anything to do with it, you’ll never be alone again.” Harry whispered.

“Why would you even say that Harry?” Louis turned to look him fiercely in the eyes. “Words are just words. They never mean anything after all.”

“What about actions speaking louder words?” Harry countered.

“And what’s that supposed to mean?”

“What do you say about a road trip to Las Vegas?”

“Vegas?” Louis snapped. “You think now is a proper moment to start talking about some fucking road trip?”

“Well, yeah, if there’s a reason behind the proposal.”

“And what would that be?” Louis huffed.

“A proposal.” Harry said, tilting his head.

“Yes, a proposal. But could you elaborate on this ‘proposal’ for me.” Louis spat out, using air quotes around the world proposal.

“Marry me.”

“Excuse me.” Louis laughed, he was sure he heard wrongly.

“Marry me. In Vegas. Tonight.”

“You’re crazy!” Louis burst out laughing. “We can’t do that.”

“Why not?”

“Because it’s— it’s just mad. You don’t get married without a good reason and certainly not to someone you’ve just met!”

“I have a good reason. You.” Harry justified, bopping Louis on the nose.

“Why me?” Louis ignored the gesture and kept asking these questions even though he knew it would all end in the same fashion, he was merely slowing down the process by a few minutes. On the other hand, it felt amazing to experience -- even if just for a short time -- the excitement Harry’s “proposal” had incited in the deeper recesses of his mind and feeling invigorated from the rush of endorphins once more before they would say their final goodbye.

“Because I love you.”

“—“ He tried to respond but the words got stuck somewhere on the way. Louis felt the muscles in his face begin to tremble and tears-- happy ones this time -- were just seconds away.

“You love me…?” He pinched his cheeks as a shy smile caressed his lips, but he just had to double-check he hadn’t fallen asleep and dreamed this all up.

“I do. And look, I know this is ridiculously soon,” Harry pressed his lips onto Louis’, “and management is going to fucking explode, but I don’t care. There’s no way that after meeting you, and experiencing what we have together, that I could ever let you get on that plane and lose you forever. I don’t think it’s possible even if I tried. Lou, I have fallen unconditionally and irrevocably in love with you.”

“You love me.” Louis hummed pleased. “Shit, well, since we’re being honest here, I kinda had a freakout earlier because I finally admitted to me’self that I had, in fact, fallen in love with you too.” He cocked his head to the side and winked at Harry.

“You did?” Harry beamed.

“Of course, I did, you twat. How could I not after the way you fucked me last night.” Louis said planting a kiss on the tip of Harry’s nose, followed by a bop.

“And don’t think I didn’t catch that Bella Swan quote about how madly in love with me you are.” Louis warned, shit-eating grin plastered on his face.

“You caught that huh?” Harry said sheepishly before continuing, “So, I can’t believe what I’m about to say after that rather, ahem, poetic declaration of love from you. ” Harry changed his position so that he was now down on the sand with only one knee. “Louis William Tomlinson, will you marry me?”

Louis smiled down at him, pausing for a second before replying, “I will marry you on one condition.”

“And what might that condition be?”

“I want a prenup.”

“How romantic.” Harry huffed, sounding mildly offended. “We just decided to get married, tonight, and you’re already planning our future divorce.”

“Of course I’m not, you wanker!”

“Then why bring up a prenup.” Harry pouted.

“I don’t want to hear any shit about how I married you because of your money, that’s why.”

“I know you wouldn’t.”

“Yeah, but you also trust people way too much and I’m not going to be one of those taking advantage of it.”

“Ok, I’ll call my lawyer on the drive home and he can draw something up. Fortunately, they have an office in Las Vegas too so they can send the documents” Harry promised. “So…?”

“Yes!!!” Louis screamed and jumped up from the lounger toppling a happily-laughing-Harry to the ground. The sand was getting everywhere; hair, mouth, even their tear-covered faces were dusted with it while they were rolling on it smooching. Eventually, it was Harry who pushed them up and said.

“Let’s get married!”

*

“Shit, it’s almost four already!” Harry cursed aloud when they were about halfway to his house. “We have to act quickly when we get home; grab get our passports and some clothes, then we must go.”

“What’s the sudden rush now?” Louis wondered.

“The office where we have to get our marriage licence will be closed at midnight.” Harry replied, pressing down a bit more on the gas pedal.

The car sped up, but Louis was staring suspiciously at Harry now. “How do you know that?” He asked with narrowed eyes.

“Umm— I might have googled it earlier…” Harry mumbled, keeping his eyes focused on the road.

“Earlier like… when?”

“Last night. While you were sleeping…” Harry winced, biting his lip. “Look, I panicked. I knew you were about to leave soon, and I needed a reason to keep you here with me.”

“And getting married in Vegas was your first choice?”

“Well, it seemed to work, don’t you think?” Harry winked his eye and Louis couldn’t help but burst into laughter.

“I suppose so.” He replied, still laughing. The atmosphere now was so different compared to what it had when they had driven to the beach. Never in a million years would Louis have envisioned this would happen to him. He had been so heartbroken and anxious about their situation and now they were about to get married. It felt so scary and exciting at the same time, and every five minutes Louis had to pinch himself to believe it was real and not just a lucid dream.

“Rings!” Harry suddenly shrieked, almost giving Louis a heart attack.

“Eh…?”

“We need wedding rings!” Harry yelled and frantically tapped a new address in the GPS.

“Call me crazy, but my intuition says that they might sell wedding rings in Vegas.” Louis replied dryly.

“I want real rings, not some bubble gum machine ones.” Harry turned up his nose.

“Don’t you dare tell me that you have looked up rings too.” Louis asked, rubbing his temples.

“Well…”

“Harry!”

“I just had a tiny peek.”

“Meaning you have already picked the ones you’d like to have, haven’t you?” Louis translated Harry’s sentence.

“You can give your opinion on them, of course.” Harry promised.

“Of course.” Louis parroted. Thank god, they weren’t planning a wedding that would be held in a year or more; half an hour was enough to cause a headache.

Bloody hell.

If anyone was an expert when it came to rings, without a doubt it was Harry. Louis really had to give Harry credit on his selection when he saw them after Harry dragged Louis in tow to an extremely expensive jeweller on Rodeo Drive. Laying before him were two thick platinum rings which looked so smooth and shiny; and when Louis had tried his on, it fit like a glove. Reluctantly he took it off and handed it back to the jeweller who put it in the black square box and handed it to Harry.

“Soon, darling.” Harry whispered into his ear while paying. “Then you won’t ever have to take it off again.”

“I know. I can’t wait for that.” Louis whispered back and couldn’t stop wondering how easy and clear it was now to look back on all the little signs that indicated how Harry felt towards him now that he is aware of them. They had been there almost from the beginning; just like Louis’ own. But he had just refused to see them because he thought what they had was what he used to have; unrequited love.

Well, Louis hadn’t really been in love before this, but his previous flings and hookups had followed the same pattern time and time again and had prevented him from seeing the forest for the trees. Fortunately, Harry has been persistent enough not to give up when Louis had tried to push him away and they would actually get their happy ending.

However, once they were back at Harry’s, Louis was already ready to take back his words about getting a happy ending. There was a big chance he would end up throttling his fiancé before they would ever get married.

Louis has been sitting on the sofa after a quick shower, a small backpack packed and ready to go, but Harry was fussing around like a headless chicken double-checking every other minute that the rings and his passport surely were packed causing Louis to finally lose his temper.

“Harry, stop it!” Louis shouted when he was once again about to start up the same absurd routine.

“What?” Harry genuinely looked confused as he froze in place, looking around.

“That.” Louis pointed to the bag in front of him. “Yes, the rings are there. So is your fucking passport. Now could you please stop it and relax. Please, love.” Louis added in a softer tone.

“But I just want to make sure they are there. We can’t get married without our passports.” Harry pouted.

“Then we can get married some other day.” Louis sighed

“I said we would get married tonight, so we are getting married tonight.” Harry announced sharply.

“Ok, then…” Louis rolled his eyes. It seemed he wasn’t the only one in this household who was stubborn. Although Louis would describe himself more as tenacious than stubborn. “Maybe we should go then?”

“I’ll just grab the car k—” Harry halted in the middle of the sentence. “I’ve got a better idea!”

Oh, sweet mother of god, give me strength, Louis thought when Harry had appeared again carrying a bigger sized leather backpack and handing it to Louis.

“Put both our stuff in here, I think it’ll all fit.” Harry said, tossing his brown travel bag in front of Louis. Then he checked Louis from head to toe finally giving a nod of approval “You’re fine”, and rushed upstairs once again.

Louis obediently did what Harry had asked. They didn’t have much with them anyway, so their clothes and other personal things fit nicely into the new bag quite easily. By the time Louis was zipping the bag closed, Harry descended the stairs looking unbelievable hot. He had changed out of his baggy grandpa trousers into leg-licking black jeans and the blouse and pearls had been replaced with a simple white Harley Davidson t-shirt; a very similar outfit compared to Louis own, except he was wearing all black. What else.

“I thought we could take the bike.”

“You look utterly fuckable looking like this.” Louis ignored his words and pressed Harry against the wall kissing him passionately.

“So you do.” Harry smiled and then rudely, Louis thought, turned them around and detached himself from Louis. “Not until we’re married, honey.”

“Prude.” Louis muttered but Harry just laughed at him telling him to follow.

“Do you really think that I’m going to sit on that all the way to Vegas?” Louis asked when they entered the garage, and noticed that Harry had rolled out the fucking gorgeous Harley.

“Why not? It will be fun.”

“Maybe for you, you’re driving. I’ll be in the death seat.”

“Would you prefer I attach the sidecar?” Harry asked with a shit-eating grin on his face, knowing full well what the answer would be. Louis raised his middle finger in the air, and Harry stood correct.

“I’ll drive slowly. Here...” Harry promised handing over a shiny black helmet and taking the sparkly gold one.

“If that’s your way of staying incognito, may I suggest neon rope lights to wrap around the bike? Maybe those ones that flicker?” Louis said, staring at Harry’s helmet.

“What do you mean?”

“That!” Louis deadpanned, pointing to the helmet. “And the canary yellow speeder we drove to the beach in, that probably cost more than some houses by the way. Not to mention parking it in front of all those tourists wandering around Rodeo Drive. So, are you sure you don’t want to add a pair of golden boots or something that draws more attention to you?”

“Good idea!” Harry exclaimed, rushing out and then returning… Wearing the fucking glitter boots.

Golden.

“Yeah,” Louis sighed “can we just go before you get any other brilliant ideas, like lighting yourself on fire?”

“Hop on.” Harry said patting the leather seat and carefully Louis climbed on behind him.

“Hold tight!” Harry yelled when the motor roared.

As if he had even needed to ask.

*  
In the end, the drive to Vegas wasn’t as bad as Louis had dreaded at the beginning. Harry was a good driver and had taken it slow at first to give Louis time to get used to it. By the time they had driven out of the city, Louis to his own surprise was already able to enjoy the ride. It had been warm out, there was no denying that. The closer they got to the desert the dryer and hotter the weather had become. The descending sun eventually gave way to cooler temperatures but by the time they arrived at their hotel, he had noticeable tan lines on his arms. Thankfully the sunblock prevented them from actually getting sunburnt.

It was late when they finally checked in to their hotel. When Louis stepped out of the bathroom drying his hair with a fluffy white towel, he found Harry half-laying on the bed scrolling his phone with only a towel wrapped around his hips.

“It shouldn’t be too far.” Harry said without raising his eyes from the screen. “The office we have to go to get the licence from, I mean.”

“I called the hotel manager while you were showering.”

“Yeah?” Louis tossed the used towel on the back of the chair and grabbed his strawberry milkshake from the table — the only thing left from his meal of burger and chips. It had already half-melted but despite the decrease in viscosity, it still tasted good.

“Yep. Believe it or not, we’re not the first guests to get married here.” Harry grinned.

“Damn!” Louis laughed. “Thought this would be an entirely unique idea.”

“Sorry to disappoint you, love. But the good news is that they can arrange for us to get the licence, so we don’t have to wait. We just go there, and we should get it in a few minutes.”

“Sounds good! I knew there was a reason I wanted to marry you.” Louis smirked, turning to admire the view over the Strip. Thousands of neon lights illuminated the darkness, making the whole city one big sea of lights. “How do we choose the chapel then?”

“Do you have any special requirements?”

“No.” Louis shook his head. “You?”

“Umm… Maybe…” Harry replied, pinching his lower lip between his fingers.

“Yes…?”

“Never mind.” Harry got up from the bed. “It was just a silly thought.”

“Harry…? You want Elvis to marry us, don’t you?” Louis suddenly realised.

“We don’t have to!” Harry hurried to say.

“I never said I wouldn’t want that.”

“You approve of Elvis?”

“Why the fuck not.” Louis grinned. “We’re in Vegas after all.”

“You don’t think it would be too tacky?” Harry questioned, his hands resting on his hips.

“It’s definitely tacky, but it’s our wedding. We can do whatever we want to do. If what we want is Elvis, then Elvis it shall be.”

*

They got Elvis, and definitely from his portly later years.

They had found this small chapel on the Strip offering Elvis weddings 24/7 and bought the package with photos, video and a few songs. If the lady at the front desk recognised Harry, she was able to keep her poker-face. After charging them, she had led them aside waiting for the previous ceremony to end.

“Are you sure about this?” Louis asked when his nerves were really starting to set in.

“More than ever.”

“You won’t get a big wedding.” Louis reminded him.

“I don’t want a wedding; I want the marriage. I want you.”

“Next” A voice echoed in the reception area they had been waiting in.

“It’s our turn.” Harry squeezed Louis’ hand. “Are you ready?”

“Yeah.” Louis gulped but nodded anyway.

This was it.

Thank god, they had bought the video as well, because Louis had no memory of the first ten minutes in the chapel. Almost like he had just woken up when the minister asked them about the vows.

Shit. He hadn’t given them even the slightest thought if he was completely honest.

“We don’t have to.” Harry said, but Louis knew this was important to him. He could improvise while speaking.

“I want to.” Louis replied and when Harry’s eyes started to sparkle, Louis knew he had made the right decision. He cleared his throat and started to speak.

“When I first saw you, I thought you were the hottest guy I’d ever seen. I still do.” Louis grinned briefly and continued.

“Then I actually got to know you better and learnt new things about you. Like that you’re quite quirky. You have a very weird taste in clothes. You tell awful jokes and probably wee a little in your pants because you laugh so much telling them. And what’s worse; you suck at playing football.”

“Hey…!” Harry whined. “We haven’t even played football together.”

“I’ve seen the YouTube videos.” Louis reminded him and Harry just shrugged nonchalantly but Louis saw the delight in his eyes, and he couldn’t keep the dimples from appearing in his cheeks.

“But it didn’t stop me falling in love with you because I also saw a man that is just amazingly inspiring. You’re kind, funny and very loyal to those close to you. You would have every reason to have become an arrogant bastard, but you’re nowhere near that. You’re always polite and friendly, even to people who don’t deserve it. But what I love most about you, is how you make me feel safe. I don’t trust people easily, but I would trust you with my life because I know you would never betray me.”

“You’re a beautiful man, Harry. Gorgeous. But you’re even more beautiful inside and I love you so, so much.” Louis’ voice broke during the last words and he squeezed Harry’s hands tightly to keep himself in one piece while his emotions took over him. Harry’s eyes were glistening when he looked at Louis’ gaze filled with so much love Louis could never have imagined.

If a faint cough hadn’t interrupted them, Louis was sure they could have stayed there staring into each other’s eyes forever. However, Elvis was subtly trying to hint they should move on with the ceremony and Harry gave him an apologizing smile and dug the neatly folded piece of paper out of his pocket.

Louis fondly rolled his eyes when he saw that, however, the fact Harry had even written his vows in advance, didn’t really surprise him at all.

“Louis,” Harry began to speak and Louis already felt his eyes well up with tears. Thank god, he had this time decided not to wear his usual eyeliner knowing it would have just ended in a smudged disaster. “I never imagined I would meet the love of my life.”

“I always dreamt about it; envisioned how would it be. Believing it would be something I would never forget. How wrong I was...” Harry sighed and Louis couldn’t small giggle escape his lips, thinking back to the night on the trolley that Harry clearly couldn’t recall.

“Maybe my memory wasn’t co-operating fully, but still inside I just knew something significant had happened and when I saw you at the gym I knew it was fate giving us another chance.”

“I had hopes from the beginning that you were the one, but I still couldn’t have dreamed this was possible. Standing here in front of… Elvis— and I promise to love you for the rest of my life. I truly do.”

“I can’t imagine ever waking up again without you by my side. This is where your size becomes handy.” Harry grinned. “I just pack you in one of my suitcases whenever I travel and I never have to.”

“Oi,” Louis objected and jokingly punched Harry on his arm.

“You got the football one, I got this.” Harry smirked.

“Fair enough.” Louis admitted and then nodded Harry to keep talking.

“I promise to always put each other first. I know it won’t always be easy and there might be times we have to compromise. But at the end of the day, if I ever have to choose between something else and you; you will always be first. Because I love you. I love you so much I can’t even describe it.”

“You’re my soulmate, the love of my life. Someone I want to write songs about. I want to dance around the kitchen with you in fifty years when we’re already old and grey; but in a very sexy way, of course. I don’t even care where in the world that kitchen is because whenever I’m with you, you make me feel like home.”

By the end of Harry’s vow, Louis was already in tears. He tried, but he just couldn’t keep the tears from rolling down his face. When they had actually exchanged the rings and Elvis had pronounced them husband and husband, and telling them they could now kiss, Louis was a blubbering mess.

Not that Harry looked any better. The kiss tasted salty from their tears but it was by far the best kiss of Louis’ life. Elvis has already started to sing ‘Love Me Tender’ in the background when they finally pulled apart. Hand in hand they listened to the rest of the song and as soon as it finished, the ceremony was over. They got their marriage certificate and wedding photo was taken with that promised video and all the photos would soon be delivered to them.

“Thank you and congratulations.” The chapel manager decreed and gave them both a hug.

That was it.

They were married.

*

“We forgot the prenup!” Louis realised when they were on the lift taking them back to their room.

“Oh.” Harry voiced aloud faintly and carefree, pulling Louis closer to him.

“That’s all you have to say? Oh.”

Harry shrugged, smiling.

“I don’t want to hear rumours that I live on your money. And I’m definitely not going to be some ‘trophy husband’ you can just show around.” Louis ranted when the doors finally opened to their floor.

“You could still fulfil your dream in theatre if you wanted.” Harry suggested. “Go back to school. Or keep doing tattoos. I don’t care what you do, as long as you are happy doing it.”

“Right.” Louis snorted, raising up the water bottle he was holding and staring at it. “Could you imagine me up on stage holding a skull voicing ‘To be, or not to be.’?”

“Easily.”

“Liar.” Louis said and stepped inside the room. He dropped the empty bottle in the bin and walked across the room when the events of the day finally hit him.

“Holy shit, Harry! We’re married.” Louis’ eyes got wide with the realisation.

“Feels good, doesn’t it.” Harry smiled and planted a kiss on Louis’ cheek.

“Really good.” Louis admitted gripping his arm. “But we are married.”

“Yes, love. We really are.”

“No, you don’t get it. We just fucking got married without telling anyone!” Louis yelled to his husband who didn’t seem to realize the situation at all.

“I guess we did. Hubby.” Harry whispered the last word into Louis’ ear.

“Hubby,” Louis tasted the name dreamily. “I like the sound of it.”

“Good, because you’ve better get used to it.”

“But seriously,” Louis said, turning his gaze to Harry. “we just eloped. Without telling our families.”

“I think that’s what the word ‘elope’ means.” Harry grinned.

“Have you thought about how we will explain this to our families?” Louis stared Harry demanding, a hand on his hip.

“What’s there to explain? We fell in love and got married.” Harry smiled, taking out his phone and snapping a photo of the bed decorated with red rose petals forming a big heart.

“A week after we met!”

“Ten days.” Harry appeared next to Louis and took a selfie of them two.

“Potayto, potahto. We are still screwed.”

“They can throw us a party later.” Harry tossed his phone on the table and pulled Louis closer.

“How can you be so calm?”

“Because I’m on my honeymoon and my hubby is absolutely gorgeous. I have some other things on my mind right now.” Harry wrapped his arms around Louis kissing his neck.

“They’re gonna kill us y’know.” Louis said while Harry’s hands were brushing his bare skin under his shirt.

”Mmmm…” Harry mumbled, pulling Louis’ T-shirt off and pressing him onto the bed in the middle of the rose heart.

”And your team and label— What about them?”

Harry silenced Louis with a kiss, looked him in the eyes, full of love and determination and whispered powerfully onto his lips.

“Frankly, my dear. I don’t give a damn.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading; hope you liked my fic! Every kudos and comment is highly appreciated and each of them means so much to me.
> 
> Here is also a Tumblr [post](https://mizzhydes.tumblr.com/post/619359633561288705/frankly-my-dear-i-dont-give-a-damn-by%E2%80%9Drel=) you to reblog, if it is something would consider to do.  
> If you have something to ask, or just want to say hi, you can always contact me.
> 
> Tumblr [mizzhydes](http://mizzhydes.tumblr.com)  
> Twitter @MsHydeStylinson


End file.
